Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I know quite a few people like this...one in particular is a young single mother. We've been 'friends' for years and it makes me really sad when she's got a young daughter to take care of and that kid has already seen at least 6 guys in her Mom' life and she's not even a year old yet. She even had a few boyfriends WHILE pregant. Some people are just really good at the relationship thing I suppose.
Well it doesn't sound like she's particularly good at it, just good at starting them.
do ppl like us have really weak & boring personalities? what's wrong with us? are we missing a certain ingredient that others seem to have??
There are too many variables. It just comes down to luck and situation in many cases; nothing wrong with such people. I don't think everyone finds love in our species, but that's why we have prostitutes.
do ppl like us have really weak & boring personalities? what's wrong with us? are we missing a certain ingredient that others seem to have??
Different people, different problems. Some issues among these people:
1) They view relationships as some kind of mechanistic process, kind of like writing code or pushing buttons on an Xbox. They have a list of requirements in a partner a mile long, so they automatically discount some pretty amazing people in their lives without realizing it. In my head, I kind of had the neo-platonic ideal of what my future wife would be. My wife fit almost none of those criteria, except for her sense of humor and her ability to create life and beauty and kindness wherever she goes. Upon meeting her, I figuratively crumpled up that mental list and tossed it away, for I had found something far better than my imagination could have ever dreamed.
2) They are spineless. Sorry to be so blunt, but courage is the foundation of all happiness. If you are afraid of heartbreak, betrayal, rejection, and a hundred other things, then you are automatically closed off to the possibilities of life. And don't dignify it by calling it cynicism. Cynicism is, in truth, a deep and pathetic weakness, a self-imposed blot on the soul. For life is a banquet, and yet there are people choose to starve to death.
3) They refuse to expand their circle of friends, interests, or avocations. If you continue just hanging out with the same handful of people, shlepping back and forth to your job every day, and perching on the sofa every night binging on Netflix, then you won't meet the person that's right for you. In short, be interested in the world, and the world will make you an interesting person.
4) They don't truly respect themselves. You don't have to dress like something out of the pages of Vogue or GQ. You don't have to be a triathlete. But, c'mon. Look at yourself in the mirror. Buy some new duds. Exercise a few times a week. Watch what you eat. Get a decent haircut. Because before that person can stare into the depths of your soul and really become bewitched by what he/she finds, they have to like the looks of you from across the room.
5) They are constantly searching for a relationship when what they should first be doing is searching for human contact. Stop hunting for romance and just embrace people in general. Because if you're hunting, you look desperate.
Some people just struggle with dating, while others thrive at it. Even the most attractive woman is gonna have a hard time dating if her personality sucks. Same applies to men as well.
I hope that I manage to say this with a minimum of offense so as to be understood. Yes. There is something wrong. Struggle to live life to the fullest, and love will find you. Struggle to find love, and you will be disappointed.
No there is nothing wrong with someone just because they can't find love. This notion that someone is inferior and defective because of this has to stop.
do ppl like us have really weak & boring personalities? what's wrong with us? are we missing a certain ingredient that others seem to have??
My feeling is that some people just simply haven't figured out how to put forth their strongest assets. A great personality isn't something that is easily summed up in an OLD profile.... but it is certainly one of the greatest things one can offer.
do ppl like us have really weak & boring personalities? what's wrong with us? are we missing a certain ingredient that others seem to have??
I am beginning to think so. I apparently am guarded and don't show feelings and affection enough, according to the current man.
I seem to only attract the project men, and since I have zero tolerance for needy projects... I eject them from my life quickly.
I value myself to much to put up with nonsense.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
