Red Flags? (girlfriends, men, gf, like)

[findly185]

When I was with my ex I paid for 2 $2400 cruises 1.) because he didn't have the money and 2.) because I wanted to go on vacation.

IMO if you plan the trip, you shouldn't ask her to cover the expenses. If you both decide to go mutually, than it should be split.

[Cantabridgienne]

Unless you are looking for an excuse to break up with her, just talk it over. You may be reading more into it than is actually there.

[OdysseusNY]

if she doesn't drive or doesn't drive much (common where I am), she may have had no idea gas could get that expensive

not that this is a good thing but perhaps something that you haven't considered?

i feel it's a little lame of her, but also worth talking over rather than jump to any conclusions

[Lilac110]

No, you're not wrong for wanting her to pay half, especially if that is what you agreed to at the outset, and especially-especially if the trip was her idea.

I would just tell her flat-out that if she can't afford to live up to her agreement, we can just go another time. I mean, she's a physician. She can afford it. It sounds like she's playing games with you.

[L0ve]

Personally I would never date a man that asked me to pay for anything or split gas. I've dated a lot of guys and never had one ask me to pay for anything. I would be insulted to say the least. Makes a guy look cheap, selfish, and greedy. Chivalry is not dead.

[OdysseusNY]

Originally Posted by Bmachina

Personally I would never date a man that asked me to pay for anything or split gas. I've dated a lot of guys and never had one ask me to pay for anything. I would be insulted to say the least. Makes a guy look cheap, selfish, and greedy. Chivalry is not dead.

fair enough. just fyi, a lot of guys who pay for everything aren't doing it to be "chivalrous"...

[jaypee]

Originally Posted by burgler09

Started planning a trip with a girl i'm dating to go out to yellowstone. Originally when we planned it, she said she would pay half of gas.. and when i brought it up closer to the time of the trip to calculaute the costs, she got a little awkward.

I'm not in the wrong for having her pay half for a trip am i? This has to be normal... and in my defense she makes quite a bit more than me considering shes a doctor.. Not that i ever bring it up to her, I pay for most things when we go out.

I'm not sure what you mean by "she got a little awkward" but there's nothing wrong with asking:
"I'm estimating the cost of our upcoming trip and the gas will be $400 and food will be $200 so we'll each pony up $300. Is that still okay with you?"

Personally, I'd just front the money if the girl hasn't been friendzoned. Maybe I'm old-fashion but splitting the bill is only something I'd do with my guy friends when we go on roadtrips.

[BKSnook]

Originally Posted by Bmachina

Personally I would never date a man that asked me to pay for anything or split gas. I've dated a lot of guys and never had one ask me to pay for anything. I would be insulted to say the least. Makes a guy look cheap, selfish, and greedy. Chivalry is not dead.

*Princess Mentality*

Burgler, perhaps there was a misunderstanding but it's not a red flag for me. This response is the only red flag I see here.

[Djuna]

Originally Posted by Lilac110

No, you're not wrong for wanting her to pay half, especially if that is what you agreed to at the outset, and especially-especially if the trip was her idea.

I would just tell her flat-out that if she can't afford to live up to her agreement, we can just go another time. I mean, she's a physician. She can afford it. It sounds like she's playing games with you.

I agree ^^^

Game playing is shoddy treatment.

[14Bricks]

Originally Posted by Bmachina

Personally I would never date a man that asked me to pay for anything or split gas. I've dated a lot of guys and never had one ask me to pay for anything. I would be insulted to say the least. Makes a guy look cheap, selfish, and greedy. Chivalry is not dead.

You might want to get into the 21 century, luckily people who think like this are dying off. As far as Chivarlry , that died with the feminist movement and "equal" rights for women.