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Old 05-18-2013, 02:05 AM
 
1,843 posts, read 2,974,193 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pammyd View Post
I absolutely believe in introducing your new beau to your children fairly early on in the relationshp. To wait six months to do so only leaves you open to become attached to the new beau and then find out six mos. down the road he /she may not like children at all. Then what?

Nothing is more important in a single parent's life than their children. I was a single parent and stayed that way for 10 years until my son became an adult and was ready to go out on his own. I had divorced his Dad when he was 11 years old. I did date along the way but made sure the men in my life at that time knew I had a son and that my son was priority. If my son was treated with any kind of disrespect while I dated by any of the men, they were HISTORY. Some of the men hung around for a time but others ran with tail between legs..didn't want the responsibility and that was fine with me.

When a person decides to be divorced and be a single parent their life changes with focus becoming raising those children to the best of their ability...men/women take a back seat. It is just the way it is.

My son now?? Very successful, married with an amazing job, home and lifestyle. His Dad?? Not in his life; not my son's choice...his Dad is a loser. My son has an Uncle who has been like a Dad to him and a Father In Law who adores him..works for us!
Not attacking you at all, just a questions really…
Wouldn’t you know by 6 months in after extensive chats and dates sans kids that a man already knows he likes children and will accept yours?

It is pretty easy to know if a man likes children, wants to be in a relationship where the woman has children or a single child, what their feelings are and so forth, why do the children need to be part of the equation before hand?
Interested in hearing your mentality on this..
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Old 05-18-2013, 12:50 PM
 
Location: In my skin
9,230 posts, read 15,465,389 times
Reputation: 9131
Quote:
Originally Posted by NilaJones View Post
It's not withholding sex to get something, it's that I cannot feel sexual interest if I don't know who someone is. And seeing how they interact with their kids is a big part of that.
You won't do it until you "know who someone is", whatever that means to you. It's still withholding. Not saying it's a bad thing, necessarily. The person you are with will have to accept it as much as you will have to wait until they are comfortable enough to expose their kids to you - however long that takes. I'm not big on setting an X weeks/months/years time frame.

I will say that, in a way, it's not a bad idea. You really do get to the core of a person when you see how they raise their kids. There are some kids I wish I had never met.
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