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I'm Ivy League educated, from middle class parents who are one generation removed from working class people. My extended family is lower middle class/working class. I am probably most comfortable with working class people, even though I have a decidedly white-collar job.
My advice to you is to just get over yourself and maybe work on finding some shreds of emotional intelligence. Does your wife know she married a snob? And given that she comes from this kind of background, how can you be anything but awed and amazed by what she has made of herself? Are you perhaps insecure about the fact that you were spoonfed opportunity while she no doubt had to work her rear off to get to where she is?
Unless you are spending excessive amounts of time with her family (like every weekend) or they are trying to sabotage your marriage, I don't see where they enter into it.
I suggest you figure out what you can live with and what you can't. Because if your wife is anything like me, she'll walk when she figures out that you hold her loved ones in disdain and contempt.
And FWIW, you might want to keep in mind that these people are the ones who helped your wife become who she is (you know, the woman you thought worthy of marrying).
When there is conversation in the family gatherings I have been to with my wife's family (99% of the time we just watch TV), it is about how terrible management or white collar people are who don't deserve to be making good money and aren't really working when they sit in an office doing research (directed by her family towards my wife) and they tell me college is a waste of time (directed at me the College Instructor).
So there is plenty of snobbery directed at white collar people from working class people too.
FYI: I had not met the family before we got married because we were living overseas and they don't believe Americans should travel overseas.
People put up with WAAAAYYYY worse from in laws trust me. You should consider yourself grateful that the only problem in their blue-collardness.
well, you're not married to her family.
Sounds like you two are similar, and you grew up with your smart family, so just you two hang out with your family, who are more intellectual like you guys. Wouldn't be the first time a person liked their in-laws better than their own parents
My wife's family fought her when she told them she wanted to go to college and she had to pay for it all herself because her parents would not help her with the tuition and refused to talk to her about her experiences at college or did they attend her college graduation.
My wife is more critical of her family than me, so the poster below would call her the snob.
Quote:
Originally Posted by JrzDefector
I'm Ivy League educated, from middle class parents who are one generation removed from working class people. My extended family is lower middle class/working class. I am probably most comfortable with working class people, even though I have a decidedly white-collar job.
My advice to you is to just get over yourself and maybe work on finding some shreds of emotional intelligence. Does your wife know she married a snob? And given that she comes from this kind of background, how can you be anything but awed and amazed by what she has made of herself? Are you perhaps insecure about the fact that you were spoonfed opportunity while she no doubt had to work her rear off to get to where she is?
Unless you are spending excessive amounts of time with her family (like every weekend) or they are trying to sabotage your marriage, I don't see where they enter into it.
I suggest you figure out what you can live with and what you can't. Because if your wife is anything like me, she'll walk when she figures out that you hold her loved ones in disdain and contempt.
And FWIW, you might want to keep in mind that these people are the ones who helped your wife become who she is (you know, the woman you thought worthy of marrying).
When there is conversation in the family gatherings I have been to with my wife's family (99% of the time we just watch TV), it is about how terrible management or white collar people are who don't deserve to be making good money and aren't really working when they sit in an office doing research (directed by her family towards my wife) and they tell me college is a waste of time (directed at me the College Instructor).
So there is plenty of snobbery directed at white collar people from working class people too.
FYI: I had not met the family before we got married because we were living overseas and they don't believe Americans should travel overseas.
Maybe they're picking up on the vibe you're projecting. Maybe you take this as an opportunity to engage them in conversation rather than taking it personally. Maybe you stand up for your wife when they run her down. Maybe you engage them in a different topic.
Frankly, they sound kind of amusing, even if there's a lot of rage there. But how much time do you REALLY spend with these people and how is it that you can't brush off what they're saying? Why does what a family of poorly educated misanthropes says matter so much to you? How is it that you are so thin-skinned you can't blow off what they say? They aren't really anything to you - why aren't you more concerned about what their words mean to your wife?
While there is nothing wrong with being low skilled working class,
Dude, there is a little bit. There are plenty of certifications and classes you cn take that are very affordable, and take less time investment than college.
All factory workers and fast food workers making under $9/hr, in their 30's!? Dude, their ****-ups. They're losers.
While there is nothing wrong with being low skilled working class, I have been doing a lot of thinking about the impact of living in this type of environment had on my wife and even with her current high level job and education she is still deep down a blue collar working class person in her attitudes and personality.
I highly doubt that you believe "There is nothing wrong with being low skilled working class."
Care to elaborate on "blue collar working class person in her attitudes and personality" ?
My only recommendation for a way to interact with these mouth-breathers is to play sports, everybody smart and dumb can appreciate a good game.
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