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In my case being 'the other man', since this is a gay thing...sort of....
Coming out of the loss of my partner 3.5 years ago and a very recent bad breakup, I am feeling...lonley...and decided to look at Craiglist.
Most of the ads are pretty...shall we say....impersonal. C.L. seems to be the online version of having sex in a park or something..fast, casual, anonymous.
But there was this one ad that seemed like the other party wanted more affection and romance.
So, I try to make contact, but have sort of a bad feeling about it since he is apparently straight and married. Based on some initial e-mails he is quite the family man (doing stuff for aged parents, husband, father, soon to be grandfather). So he wants to talk on the phone.
So I call, but he can't speak freely. Guess the wife is nearby?
After all this, and I am already feeling wierd about being a potential "other woman" in someones extramarital affair, I am going to pull the plug. I sort of am curious as to what this guy looks like, but no, this is NOT right.
There is also..how should I say this....something that rubs me the wrong way about this. He is able to claim heterosexual privelege, in that he is ostensibly the regular guy, with family, kids, grandkids, a normal life, but then dips down into this demimonde of a sexual underground, of sexual outsiders, such as myself...there is something about that that I sort of resent. Resent being used, maybe?
Not what I am looking for...no...not going to be the other woman, not going through with this.
It does sound like a situation to stay clear of! You would definitely be better off with someone single, free and clear, and confident in their preferences!
I do not think CL is the best place to go looking. Although I am sure there are quality legitimate people there, finding them among all the bad actors is like searching for a needle in a haystack!
I'm thinking that CL would be maaybe a place for something, but I need to make my own ad and see what comes of it....surfing in there and replying to that ad was sort of an act of desperation and feeling alone....
Stay away from CL period. It's the bottom of the Barrel. Do you think this guy is Gay and living a Lie? Or is he Bi and just endulging his fantisies? Either way you know the right thing to do.
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