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There is this guy who is interested in me. But. His most recent wife (he's been married twice and he's in his thirties) separated from him because she said she was in an "unhealthy marriage". She was a stay-at-home-mom at the time, and she was trying to get away from him by starting her own business so that she could support herself and their daughter. After all that, they then got back together, but ultimately divorced a couple of years later.
I don't know this ex-wife personally, so I don't have a way of clarifying what she meant by "unhealthy marriage", aside from asking him directly.
Going on this information alone, would you continue to let this guy pursue you? Or would this be enough of a red flag to make you run?
I'd ask him directly. To me, any man I date is a potential partner. Now, he probably won't be honest if he was the problem or if he was abusive, unless he really believes that he was right to do whatever it was that wrecked the marriage (and there are plenty of those out there). But you can sometimes pick up on it.
Where did you get the idea that she was "trying to get away from him" by starting her own business? Lots of women do this, even in healthy relationships.
I'd ask him directly. To me, any man I date is a potential partner. Now, he probably won't be honest if he was the problem or if he was abusive, unless he really believes that he was right to do whatever it was that wrecked the marriage (and there are plenty of those out there). But you can sometimes pick up on it.
Where did you get the idea that she was "trying to get away from him" by starting her own business? Lots of women do this, even in healthy relationships.
It's not an idea, it's a fact. Their mutual friend confided this information to me. Starting the business was for the purpose of leaving him.
I always say, listen to you intuition. If you feel as though something is not right, go with your gut.
I'm a big proponent of intuition as well. And honestly, my gut does say something is off here. So that's why I'm taking a big step back and not letting this take off.
It's not an idea, it's a fact. Their mutual friend confided this information to me. Starting the business was for the purpose of leaving him.
Her starting the business for the purpose of leaving him doesn't automatically make this third party's information correct. People are very rarely 100% impartial, we're just not built that way.
Her starting the business for the purpose of leaving him doesn't automatically make this third party's information correct. People are very rarely 100% impartial, we're just not built that way.
You're going to have to trust me on this one. I can't reveal specifics here because I'm not trying to out myself. But it's the truth.
I do like him. But I also have a tendency to be drawn to obsessive, perfectionistic guys who aren't at peace within themselves...guys who haven't done the personal growth that they need to do, enough to understand the role they play in creating the issues in their lives.
I get the sense he is one of those guys. He has money, he is good-looking...but I sense impulsiveness there, like he's a "I want what I want when I want it" type. He's driven and successful, which is good, but I want to step back to get a better sense of what his character is really like.
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