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Another odd question for you humans who are generally more normal than I seem to be. I promise not to yell at you, no matter what you say. Upon becoming irritated, I'll just curse at the screen while smashing soda cans or something....
I got asked out on a date and given the phone number of someone who is not the best looking woman....
We're pals though.
Regarding you people who think: don't be pals with anyone you're not attracted to, or this type of thing might happen, I can't go that route. I must talk to everyone. That's why I get up in the morning...to talk to strangers....
Another characteristic that seems fairly rare among humans, other than myself, is I never have ulterior motives.
I was talking to another girl, a good-looking one, and told her she's a beautiful, wonderful person and asked her if she wanted to go do something sometimes. She said she's busy all the time. No games just...you're a beautiful, wonderful person...I'm extremely busy, sorry...Oh well, we still talk, and we're still relaxed around one another.
When I was talking to the good-looking girl, I also told her that I didn't really want to date her, so much as be around her more...and I meant exactly that, as always. I didn't care what she thought of me...if she'd be willing to humor me and go play miniature golf or something....
It should be noted, that while some people might view the above as foolish and not thinking about the future enough...I will almost certainly never enter into a long term commitment of any kind, due to a lack of interest. Some of the things people view as positives of long term commitments (the support, the having someone to talk to) I view as negatives. I hate all that stuff Therefore, I do not actually see my lack of forethought, in this regard, as a problem.
Anyway, the not-so good-looking girl said she'd "been wanting to date me for a long time." She also said it would be as friends.
If I'd say I'd want to do something as friends, I'd mean it...but then I don't have ulterior motives. Other people seem to....most of you, by the way. I'm fairly oblivious to ulterior motives. I have zero skill in predicting them whatsoever. I am dumb as a stump in this regard.
How much chance is there that the not so good-looking girl is genuinely just bored and wants company for amusement, and how much chance is there that she's thinking He's mine! Ahahahahah! which, while flattering, could become awkward should I act like I traditionally act around all my acquaintances, and behave in a manner of sloth and indignity, and avoid maintenance work of any kind....
If she genuinely wants to do something to cure boredom, that sounds fun.
I don't really know what to do about this...My plan so far is to call up the not-so good-looking girl before asking if she wants to do something, and explain to her that I have never had any interest in committed relationships of any kind, which is true. I'll leave out the part about not wanting to date her because she's not so good-looking
She said she'd been wanting to "date" you for a long time. Not "hang out with", or "kill time with" you. That tells you all you need to know.
While she probably isn't thinking "he's MINE, bwahahahahaha!" yet, because you haven't even gone on a date with her yet, she's thinking there may be relationship potential, since you agreed to "date" her. She's thinking she at least has a shot. Her hopes are up. Even though she said it would just be as friends. "Date" + "as friends" don't go together, imo.
She's hoping a romance will develop. Please don't lead her on... that may require some tough love on your part, such as NOT being close friends with her so she can get past you.
She's hoping a romance will develop. Please don't lead her on... that may require some tough love on your part, such as NOT being close friends with her so she can get past you.
Another odd question for you humans who are generally more normal than I seem to be. I promise not to yell at you, no matter what you say. Upon becoming irritated, I'll just curse at the screen while smashing soda cans or something....
I got asked out on a date and given the phone number of someone who is not the best looking woman....
We're pals though.
Regarding you people who think: don't be pals with anyone you're not attracted to, or this type of thing might happen, I can't go that route. I must talk to everyone. That's why I get up in the morning...to talk to strangers....
Another characteristic that seems fairly rare among humans, other than myself, is I never have ulterior motives.
I was talking to another girl, a good-looking one, and told her she's a beautiful, wonderful person and asked her if she wanted to go do something sometimes. She said she's busy all the time. No games just...you're a beautiful, wonderful person...I'm extremely busy, sorry...Oh well, we still talk, and we're still relaxed around one another.
When I was talking to the good-looking girl, I also told her that I didn't really want to date her, so much as be around her more...and I meant exactly that, as always. I didn't care what she thought of me...if she'd be willing to humor me and go play miniature golf or something....
It should be noted, that while some people might view the above as foolish and not thinking about the future enough...I will almost certainly never enter into a long term commitment of any kind, due to a lack of interest. Some of the things people view as positives of long term commitments (the support, the having someone to talk to) I view as negatives. I hate all that stuff Therefore, I do not actually see my lack of forethought, in this regard, as a problem.
Anyway, the not-so good-looking girl said she'd "been wanting to date me for a long time." She also said it would be as friends.
If I'd say I'd want to do something as friends, I'd mean it...but then I don't have ulterior motives. Other people seem to....most of you, by the way. I'm fairly oblivious to ulterior motives. I have zero skill in predicting them whatsoever. I am dumb as a stump in this regard.
How much chance is there that the not so good-looking girl is genuinely just bored and wants company for amusement, and how much chance is there that she's thinking He's mine! Ahahahahah! which, while flattering, could become awkward should I act like I traditionally act around all my acquaintances, and behave in a manner of sloth and indignity, and avoid maintenance work of any kind....
If she genuinely wants to do something to cure boredom, that sounds fun.
I don't really know what to do about this...My plan so far is to call up the not-so good-looking girl before asking if she wants to do something, and explain to her that I have never had any interest in committed relationships of any kind, which is true. I'll leave out the part about not wanting to date her because she's not so good-looking
Thank you all.
Lol.. You do not sound so challenged to me..
I am a lot like you…I cannot help it..I talk to everyone and sometimes my personality seems to be taken into the wrong context but this is not my fault this is their fault for being so presumptuous period…
However I am going to pull your card…
You stated you mean what you say and say what you mean…
You stated that the good looking girl you wanted to be around more with no ulterior motives stated she was too busy…And you did not have any game?
And you really meant that you just wanted to be around her more?
Yet the “Not so good looking girl” told you that she was interested in dating you but as friends but you are hesitant because AGAIN you mean what you say and mean what you say…and if you agree to go and do something fun with this not so good looking girl if she is asking you out of sheer boredom than you are al for it but what if she really wants more?
I would say to you…”Pot meet kettle” You can trust yourself so to speak that your intentions for this good looking girl are to strictly be around her more?
Why do you want to be around her more if your intentions are just to hang out?
“Friends” Even though you stated :Good looking girl” and you seem to mention that she was to busy..this tells me that it bothered you that she declined…
I think you need to be honest with yourself..
And really? There is no harm in going out as friends with the less attractive woman after all she stated as friends and you can always refer back to this if something goes awry and she starts to ask for something else…
hmmm
Back to this again. I was pretty set on Ruth and Orange's idea...but there is the above member who disagrees.
Is "date" not just a word? If I make it perfectly clear that I don't want a romantic relationship, does it not become her problem, rather than mine? It can't truly be that every woman in this culture has the same definition of date, can it? She said it would be as friends.
Would it not be unfair to the people who may have unusual goals, but say what they want, to assume they have the mentality of people with more usual goals?
She said she'd been wanting to date me for a long time. Could this not be the same view of dating I might want, in which there is little to no chance of a long term commitment?
I never told the good-looking girl I'd been wanting to date her for a long time, but in addition to the other things I told her, I also told her I'd had a big crush on her for about the last year and a half, and that she's like crack to me. I still wouldn't want her to think that means I'm interested in a long term commitment with her (because I specifically also told her I'm not interested in dating her, so much as that I just like being around her), necessarily. I was just telling about my instincts....
(that makes 2 to 2, by the way...the above member and myself, vs. Ruth and Orange....)
OP, I think this girl has been wanting to date you romantically for awhile. If you want to just go out and spend some time together as friends you need to make it really clear to her that you are not looking for a relationship right now, but would be open to being her friend and hanging out now and then.
Another odd question for you humans who are generally more normal than I seem to be. I promise not to yell at you, no matter what you say. Upon becoming irritated, I'll just curse at the screen while smashing soda cans or something....
I got asked out on a date and given the phone number of someone who is not the best looking woman....
We're pals though.
Regarding you people who think: don't be pals with anyone you're not attracted to, or this type of thing might happen, I can't go that route. I must talk to everyone. That's why I get up in the morning...to talk to strangers....
Another characteristic that seems fairly rare among humans, other than myself, is I never have ulterior motives.
I was talking to another girl, a good-looking one, and told her she's a beautiful, wonderful person and asked her if she wanted to go do something sometimes. She said she's busy all the time. No games just...you're a beautiful, wonderful person...I'm extremely busy, sorry...Oh well, we still talk, and we're still relaxed around one another.
When I was talking to the good-looking girl, I also told her that I didn't really want to date her, so much as be around her more...and I meant exactly that, as always. I didn't care what she thought of me...if she'd be willing to humor me and go play miniature golf or something....
It should be noted, that while some people might view the above as foolish and not thinking about the future enough...I will almost certainly never enter into a long term commitment of any kind, due to a lack of interest. Some of the things people view as positives of long term commitments (the support, the having someone to talk to) I view as negatives. I hate all that stuff Therefore, I do not actually see my lack of forethought, in this regard, as a problem.
Anyway, the not-so good-looking girl said she'd "been wanting to date me for a long time." She also said it would be as friends.
If I'd say I'd want to do something as friends, I'd mean it...but then I don't have ulterior motives. Other people seem to....most of you, by the way. I'm fairly oblivious to ulterior motives. I have zero skill in predicting them whatsoever. I am dumb as a stump in this regard.
How much chance is there that the not so good-looking girl is genuinely just bored and wants company for amusement, and how much chance is there that she's thinking He's mine! Ahahahahah! which, while flattering, could become awkward should I act like I traditionally act around all my acquaintances, and behave in a manner of sloth and indignity, and avoid maintenance work of any kind....
If she genuinely wants to do something to cure boredom, that sounds fun.
I don't really know what to do about this...My plan so far is to call up the not-so good-looking girl before asking if she wants to do something, and explain to her that I have never had any interest in committed relationships of any kind, which is true. I'll leave out the part about not wanting to date her because she's not so good-looking
Thank you all.
Don't lie to the "not-so-good looking" gal.
You DO want a relationship just not with her.
You tell her you will go out as "friends" with her. Have fun and enjoy the night.
If anything, some hot girl may see you with her and think... "He can do better...like me"
Oh and don't come right out and tell a woman she is beautiful and all that. It's not a good pick up line.
Read the thread where the guy just sat close and conversed with the girl. Much more effective.
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Therefore, I do not actually see my lack of forethought, in this regard, as a problem.
