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I've never been asked on a date by a woman but have had numerous gay guys hit on me. As a straight man who gets very little attention from women but who's more secure than most guys in his sexuality, I'm actually flattered by the gay male attention. It's a reminder that at least some people are interested in you, even if it's not who you're interested in yourself. I've always been fairly shy and awkward with women, but that kind of thing doesn't matter as much to the gay guys, since there's no gender-specific expectation of being an initiator.
Times have changed,and women do ask men out. And they plan dates.(Oh the horror.)
What I want to know what was your reactions to a woman asking a man out? Were you turned off? Scared? Flattered? Enjoyed it?
Like I assume it is when a guy asks a girl out…it depends.
In my experiences, women don't ask out per se, rather largely hint that they want to be asked out. One time a coworker and I were talking about some movie we both liked and she said "see, you and I should hang out". I took the hint. Another time a new girl to the company kept asking what bars were good in the area and telling me how much she loved happy hour. More recently, a former coworker kept saying things like "hey, I was watching a show last night that reminded me of you" and "Oh, I really love that bar" regarding a bar I had just been to. Combine that with a lot of other obvious signs of interest (body language, touching my arm at any opportunity, etc.), I would then ask them out. But this should kind of count as being asked out since they were dropping heavy hints
Anyway, I say it depends because there were three instances where it was weird. One was when a gf of a friend surprised me with trying to arrange a late night encounter (she was very promiscuous so I wasn't that flattered). She was very attractive, but I just didn't respond. Two other times were by girls I wasn't attracted to. One was cute, but weird (she sent me an email about me taking her out), other was not attractive to me (prob twice my size) who called me about something else but ended the call with "just so you know, whenever I need a date I'm calling you". It was doubly weird because she was the type of girl who always had a boyfriend, and I knew her current bf, and they were always the criminal type. In the last two instances I just completely ignored them. I know that sounds mean, but considering their personality types, it was the right move.
No matter what, I like to make the first move, even if it is being hinted at. Years ago I met a girl at a party. She was cute, smart, successful. I gave her my number for work reasons and told her to call me. She replied "you're the boy, you call me". I really liked that. Not only did it make clear that she was interested in me beyond a work relationship, but it made me feel like a man.
Question for the men and forgive me if I missed it earlier but did you like a girl for months, maybe years and yet were afraid to approach her? did she eventually approach you or did you get the nerve up?
I wouldn't say I was afraid to approach due to rejection, but more depending on the context.
One woman I met when I was new at a job and thought she was cute. Talked to her a few times and realized I liked her quirky personality too. I wanted to go out with her but 1) I had a gf at the time (relationship was ending, but still) 2) we worked together in an environment where if it went bad my job would end. As soon as I left that job I asked her out. We went out a few times, didn't pan out.
In another instance I met a girl who I thought was cute/cool. We became friends because we were both dating other people at the time. Even thought we both became single fairly soon thereafter, we were still friends for a while. We eventually hooked up a bunch of times and I guess you could say we dated.
Anyway, it sounds like you have a guy you're interested in and it seems like he isn't asking you out. It's very possible that he's waiting for a sign that you like him. Some guys need a lot of hints dropped to them. I am somewhat perceptive and alert, and even I need to be spoon fed sometimes
I don't run after men. I don't ask them out. But I'm pretty traditional and have never really followed what's en vogue, esp. when it comes to relationships. And so far, it's always worked well for me and I don't have any regrets .
I swear, I have the WORST luck when it comes to guys. Most just politely declined though, only a few were outright mean.
As a guy if a girl asked me out and i was not interested i would just tell her I have a GF even though I do not. I do not see the point of being a D bad about it.
Fear of rejection is definitely a factor for many men it certainly was for me when I was younger and it would still be for me.if I was in the dating world today. If I was trying to date in today's world I would be rejected faster than a man applying for a server position at Hooters..
I do not know what it feels like to be rejected by a woman.
As a guy if a girl asked me out and i was not interested i would just tell her I have a GF even though I do not. I do not see the point of being a D bad about it.
Because their self worth is based on how hot the women are who are attracted to them. if an ugly, fat chick hits on them, that's a direct insult to them.
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