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Exactly. I bet anything he feels like he's doing all the work. That's just wrong.
A month is too long to play the "I'm a girl so I cant do anything" card.
Hm...didn't realize picking up the phone was doing all the work.
Question for you: if you liked someone...would you wait 9 days to contact them?
Why do people on cd ignore the traditional roles of men and women in courting and get bent out of shape when everyone else doesn't oblige? How am I supposed to know now that I should be the one asking HIM out when for ages it's been the other way around?! How do I know he agrees with these new age roles or if he is seriously just not interested? This whole thing is freaking confusing and not worth it anymore.
Date 4: Went to movies and dinner. Shared dessert. Kissed some more. We were holding hands walking to the subway when all of a sudden he let go and felt kind of distant. It was really wierd since the date was going so well until the end. At the subway stop he gave me a peck and headed off. Hadn't heard from him for 9 days since then.
Today: He texted me and asked how I was doing. He said he was thinking about me and wanted to say hi. I told him I was leaving town for a couple of days. He didn't ask for another date or anything...weird, so I just cut the conversation short and said I would get back to him later.
So should I just move on? Does it seem like he's interested? I have never had a guy wait 9 days to call/ text me if he was truly interested. This to me is a red flag. Also, what was the point of texting me today if he didn't schedule anything? Is this some sort of game?! UGH! I had erased his number after day 5 and now this!
I'm sure he really does like you but not enough to contact you within the 9 days after he got distant towards the end of the date for whatever reason.
Doesn't matter what he says (which is likely B.S.). What he says is less important than what he does. What he does is all you need to know.
Non-verbal communication is 80% of communication. Why continue to be strung along? Even if he did have something important pop up in his life, a simple text to keep you updated is too much to ask for? Especially from someone he claims to be really interested in? He's contradicting himself.
Just make sure you're not a rebound (yeah- I know I'm assuming) but you clearly have to watch out and move on. Otherwise, you're allowing yourself to ask for more. More hurt, that is..
Hm...didn't realize picking up the phone was doing all the work.
Question for you: if you liked someone...would you wait 9 days to contact them?
Why do people on cd ignore the traditional roles of men and women in courting and get bent out of shape when everyone else doesn't oblige? How am I supposed to know now that I should be the one asking HIM out when for ages it's been the other way around?! How do I know he agrees with these new age roles or if he is seriously just not interested? This whole thing is freaking confusing and not worth it anymore.
It's not really that confusing. If you don't like the way he's going about dating, just move on. I think traditional dating roles are silly but I understand people still like to abide by them.
He might be asking the same question about you. Back when I dated I didn't want to be the only one to initiate any conversation. I wouldn't have waited nine days to contact someone I liked, but I also wouldn't like it if she didn't try to contact me either.
Honestly, I think you'd feel better if you just did what feels right instead of following some antiquated gender roles.
Hm...didn't realize picking up the phone was doing all the work.
Question for you: if you liked someone...would you wait 9 days to contact them?
Why do people on cd ignore the traditional roles of men and women in courting and get bent out of shape when everyone else doesn't oblige? How am I supposed to know now that I should be the one asking HIM out when for ages it's been the other way around?! How do I know he agrees with these new age roles or if he is seriously just not interested? This whole thing is freaking confusing and not worth it anymore.
So what work are you doing?? I bet you plan all the dates and you pay for everything and you pick him up right?
Sure, I would call someone if I like them. And, I guess what? I'm a girl.
You like this guy don't you? I guess that makes you a big ol hypocrite since you've gone 9 days without calling him.
Since I ended the conversation with him today and told him I was in the middle of something, should I follow up tomorrow or wait...again, for him to initiate? You are both right, I would like an explanation
From the way you are describing this scenario, it sounds like you never initiate contact with the guy. If this is true, the reason the guy is being weird is partially your fault. Showing interest is a two way street. For this guys sake, I sure hope you are texting him occasionally without him engaging first.
If you do send the occasional text and make the occasional phone call, then perhaps the guy has high anxiety, or low social skills, or any million other reasons to be 'awkward'.
You can be as proactive as you want but ultimately you'll find out he isn't really into you.
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