Gender Differences in Implicit Self-Esteem Following a Romantic Partner’s Success or Failure (date, wife)

[nifear]

This research examined the influence of a romantic partner’s success or failure on one’s own implicit and
explicit self-esteem. In sum, men’s implicit self-esteem is lower when a partner succeeds than
when a partner fails, whereas women’s implicit self-esteem is not. These gender differences have
important implications for understanding social comparison in romantic relationships.


http://www.apa.org/pubs/journals/rel...p-a0033769.pdf

[GraciousVox]

Nothing new here. Everyone knows that if a woman gets a big promotion making more $$, her bf/husband will likely not feel great about himself as a result.

[Phoenix2017]

Never been an issue personally, for me as a man In fact, I wish absolutely every possible success and all blessings, to a hypothetical and potential romantic partner, and even if she has an overall greater level of success, than me

[rego00123]

ive never experienced it. i always felt overwhelmingly happy for my wife when she achieved her career goals.

but, we are both successful, so that might be a determining factor.

[findly185]

I'm an extremely competitive woman. I do prefer to outperform my male romantic partners as well as any male counterpart.

[GraciousVox]

Originally Posted by findly185

I'm an extremely competitive woman. I do prefer to outperform my male romantic partners as well as any male counterpart.

Why? Do you need a win, an outside seal of approval to feel good about yourself?

[nald]

No, it might have something with the notion that some people tend to avoid sleeping with their competitive partners, while some tend to do the opposite.
Some people are also using sex to progress with their career.

[Braunwyn]

Originally Posted by findly185

I'm an extremely competitive woman. I do prefer to outperform my male romantic partners as well as any male counterpart.

That kind of goal cannot be good for your relationships.

[findly185]

Originally Posted by Braunwyn

That kind of goal cannot be good for your relationships.

It works out fine because I tend to attract men with more feminine energy and different priorities and ideas of achievement. Aka my idea of achievement is constructed by how well I do academically or in a work environment, while the men I date derive their sense of accomplishment from family/friends.

[stan4]

How effed up is deriving esteem from your wife's lack of success?

That is majorly screwed up.