For men who have a preference in terms of class, and prefer middle to upper middle women, what do you admire about them (marry, love)

[MichaelOrear]

Hello,

To any guys on this board who for mates have a preference in terms of class and like middle to upper middle class women, what do you like and admire about them?

Thanks

[nokiddin]

socio-economic background is irrelevant to me, its how they look and treat me that counts. i use to have different expectations, but i discovered that just caused relationship problems for me.

your question would be more interesting if it was posed for women looking for mates instead

[andrewC7]

I don't admire them but they're usually better looking, less likely to smoke, less likely to have tweety bird tattoos/tramp stamps, less likely to have a baby daddy, & less likely to wear inappropriate clothing to Walmart...unfortunate, but true.

why would any man have a preference of class? If she's pretty and good mannered her stock is going to be high. Class is not going to matter.

[Chemistry_Guy]

I don't care about her finances that much, but values are a very important part of compatibility for me. I want someone that likes to learn, values education, who can hold her own in a philosophical debate, and who is an expert in topics that I am not. I also want someone who is not impressed with "stuff" and who doesn't obsess over cars, jewelry, and fancy clothes. I want someone that can teach me interesting things.

Often, the women that meet these criteria for me are middle to upper class, have advanced degrees or a well rounded undergraduate background, have lived in a range of different environments, and are most attracted to men with similar qualities. I am sure there are plenty of women with whom I would be compatible that aren't middle to upper socioeconomic class, but I just don't meet them. I have spent most of my life on and around college campuses and government labs and my social circles are mostly professionals.

[Pinkmani]

I'm a woman, but I have some input.

I won't marry anyone less than my father. I want a man who has a car, a career (not a job) or working on establishing a career, nice teeth, non-smoker, and in-shape.

As far as money, he has to be responsible with his money. I'll marry someone with student loan debt, but credit card debt and a low credit score needs to be fixed before we wed.

Knows his purpose in life
Faithful
Selfless
Strong work ethic
Intellectual
Romantic
Responsible
Accepting and tolerant of others
Willing to compromise

[nokiddin]

Originally Posted by Pinkmani

I'm a woman, but I have some input. ...As far as money, he has to be responsible with his money. I'll marry someone with student loan debt, but credit card debt and a low credit score needs to be fixed before we wed.

great! thanks for your input, very insightful and confirms what i have often said here on CDR about the hypocritical double standard of "superficial" preferences such as beauty/youth and wealth/financial security. really i dont disagree with this approach, but just think ppl are being disingenuous about the realities in partner selection when they argue and chide otherwise.

so, based on what you have said, is it fair to say that for you love conquers all
except when it comes to financial stability and responsibility?

[Chowhound]

I like how they look respectable in public, but once the doors close..........

[SFTRK]

She works...like a real job.

Not 6 hours a week at a video store.

Anything else is shallow.

[Pinkmani]

Originally Posted by nokiddin

great! thanks for your input, very insightful and confirms what i have often said here on CDR about the hypocritical double standard of "superficial" preferences such as beauty/youth and wealth/financial security. really i dont disagree with this approach, but just think ppl are being disingenuous about the realities in partner selection when they argue and chide otherwise.

so, based on what you have said, is it fair to say that for you love conquers all
except when it comes to financial stability and responsibility?

I think you misinterpreted what I said or maybe I wasn't clear enough.

-If a man isn't responsible with his money, then how can I be sure that he won't bankrupt our finances.
-If a man has credit card debt, it means that he isn't living within his means.
-If a man has low credit score, that means he isn't paying his bills on time.

So, I wouldn't want to marry into someone with poor financial habits in fear that they will continue those habits in our marriage.

[CSD610]

Originally Posted by andrewC7

I don't admire them but they're usually better looking, less likely to smoke, less likely to have tweety bird tattoos/tramp stamps, less likely to have a baby daddy, & less likely to wear inappropriate clothing to Walmart...unfortunate, but true.

why would any man have a preference of class? If she's pretty and good mannered her stock is going to be high. Class is not going to matter.

Are you looking for a mate or looking to purchase cattle?