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Lol. Whether she wants to date him or not does not matter.
Yes it does. If she doesn't want him then why would she care if he didnt want to date her because she has kids. Some people continue to believe that single moms care about the opinions of 100% of men, when in reality a single mom really only wants the opinion of the particular group of men that she is interested in dating. in other words single moms are no different than other women--we have types, preferences, standards, etc. and unless a man falls under our type or is a potential prospect for us we could care less that there is one random man somewhere on this planet, who we will never meet, that would never date us because we have children.
I only care if the men I want and like, want me. while comments about my status as a single mom may be hurtful, they don't matter as much to me as does the opinions of actual men that I am interested in dating. I have not yet come across a man that I liked that did not want me back so therefore your opinion or other groups of men opinions will hold no obvious weight, beyond the simple reality that not everyone will want me. And really that is the same reality for most people--there will always be a group of people that may not like you. Though the reasons will vary, it's a reality most people will encounter.
Yes it does. If she doesn't want him then why would she care if he didnt want to date her because she has kids. Some people continue to believe that single moms care about the opinions of 100% of men, when in reality a single mom really only wants the opinion of the particular group of men that she is interested in dating. in other words single moms are no different than other women--we have types, preferences, standards, etc. and unless a man falls under our type or is a potential prospect for us we could care less that there is one random man somewhere on this planet, who we will never meet, that would never date us because we have children.
I only care if the men I want and like, want me. while comments about my status as a single mom may be hurtful, they don't matter as much to me as does the opinions of actual men that I am interested in dating. I have not yet come across a man that I liked that did not want me back so therefore your opinion or other groups of men opinions will hold no obvious weight, beyond the simple reality that not everyone will want me. And really that is the same reality for most people--there will always be a group of people that may not like you. Though the reasons will vary, it's a reality most people will encounter.
I'm a single father and I have to disagree with your post.
Not sure about your situation but when I became a single father it certainly wasn't by choice (she ran off and disappeared). My son was only 2 at the time and the longer I stayed home alone the more depressed I got. I had to get back out there and date again. I needed a companion in my life and I made sure that I mostly dated single moms. Reason being that only another single parent will understand what it's like having to raise your kids on your own. Luckily I met my girlfriend who is also a single mom and we have been together two years now.
There was just no way I could have just remained single and dateless for 10 years. I would have ended up an antisocial misfit after all that time. It was hard enough getting back into the dating scene after being married for so many years and I can't imagine it getting any easier the longer you wait.
Bottom line is that single parents are still human beings that seek companionship and intimacy. Not all of us can just turn all those feelings and desires off.
What do you mean you did not have a choice to have a child?
I'm trying to figure out this perception that most single moms don't work or on welfare. It must be an age thing, because most single women I know AND single women's profiles I have seen online, they have jobs, and many of them are professional. Also many single mothers and fathers, didn't plan on being that way, divorce does happen. And folks who keep asking, where is the dad? I'm sure the father is in the picture raising thier child, best they can, just as the mother of their child is. Don't let the Maury Povich show make you think that kids who are staying with one parent, are only being raised by one parent. And to answer your question, many single mothers have no problems getting dates. Just like many single dads don't have a problem getting dates.
Sure, they are pros with high income but it also puts a wall in their life by having a child. You can't do that the stuff you want to do when you don't have a kid.
They are raising the child really? Then how come there are Single Moms but we don't hear about the single dad's? The father is paying Child Support.
You will always have ties with the father of this child though regardless of who you end up with.
Quote:
Originally Posted by jillabean
I haven't finished reading the whole tread yet...
Single mom here. I am a working professional... make $85k a year and own my own home (not on food stamps or in poverty). I work full time, pick up my child from school, live a normal life. Etc. I did OLD and never had any problem getting dates or offers to date. To be fair, sometimes after a date a man wouldn't be interested (usually because it was an older man with grown kids who didn't realize how young mine was.. which always blows my mind, at my age how old do they think my child would be?). But they knew I had a child.
My biggest problem with OLD (and why I quit) where the sheer number of married men looking to cheat and young guys who wanted to hook up for sex. I am not interested in either. Both types, while I know I can meet them offline, seem a lot more brazen online.
When do I date? Well, I have split custody with her father--so when she's with him, I go out. Easy. I am not sure why I should wait around and do nothing just because I am the mother. Her father certainly doesn't (nor should he). He's got a live-in boyfriend already... I am just out dating.
Right now I am dating a man who is divorced, like me, but who doesn't have kids of his own. Doesn't seem to bother him... in fact, he knows all about my child and even sends gifts (doesn't need to, but he does).
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........... A lot of men run from the responsibility. 
