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She has never explicitly told me this, but I have a feeling she wonders why she can't find a man. Maybe if she worked to improve herself she would have a boyfriend? Meanwhile she looks down on me and calls me a "player" because I flirt a lot with women. I'm in no position to tell her to get on a treadmill, but its too bad she doesn't, because her face isn't half bad.
Anything I can do to help her out?
Leave her alone.
You may mean well, but obese people are well aware they are obese, so there is no point in bringing it to their attention. Furthermore, many, if not most, obese people have tried to lose weight repeatedly. Some have even succeeded for a while, then regained it.
Obesity is a complex problem. Unfortunately, the culture insists it is all a due to laziness. All I can say is that some of my hardest-working co-workers are obese. Whatever else they are, they aren't lazy.
I don't tell people either one. The only person that I've told to quit smoking started smoking as a 29 or 30 year old. She did it because she wanted to look cool. People know that smoking and being obese are unhealthy. They don't need anyone to remind them. But I will tell people not to smoke in front of me because it makes me sick. People eating too much in front of me has no effect on me.
I dont mean "you" personally, I mean society.
It's okay for society to say smoking is bad for you, but its not okay for society to say that being overweight is bad for you.
It's okay for society to say smoking is bad for you, but its not okay for society to say that being overweight is bad for you.
But this is personal. You are not society. You are her friend. Society DOES say that being overweight is bad for you. What is not okay is for you to tell your friend that she would be more attractive and that more men would like her if she lost weight. I bet she already knows that.
Why is it okay to tell someone who is smoking to quit, but not okay to tell an obese person to lose weight?
It's really none of your business to do either.
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It's okay for society to say smoking is bad for you, but its not okay for society to say that being overweight is bad for you.
There's a HUGE (no pun intended) federally and private funded movement specifically addressing obesity.
It's not your job to "help" someone who has asked, and to make it worse, your speculating, she's never actually said she wonders why.
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A thread similar to this one was closed a few days ago. This one is now closed for the same reasons. It is trolling and it is rife with off-topic posts, personal attacks and pontificating.
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