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It looks like I've totally blown it with a girl who seemed super interested in me all because of one question I ask.
We were planning out our 2nd date to just hang out and have a Walking Dead marathon. She wanted to do it at my place. I don't mind having women over, but the only thing I don't like is I have no control on when the date ends. I can't just say ok, time for you to leave.
So she asked via text what time to meet, and I suggested 12 noon.
Her reply: ok
Then I asked if she would mind if we ended the date around 4 or 5ish as I had errands to run later.
Her response was basically since I was so busy we could meet another time. No more communication after that. I'm not sure if this is anything I can say to repair the damage with the kind of angry response.
I don't think my request was that unreasonable, and if she had asked me the same thing, I wouldn't get mad, or certainly just end everything over a single disagreement It's surprising because she has been extremely sweet and laid back until now, but sometimes the sweet girls are the ones who can turn on a dime.
Um, 4-5 hours for a second date? At your place? I think you are giving her more than enough time and putting more than enough effort into it considering its only date #2.
I don't know. Suggesting a Saturday afternoon date that ends at 4 p.m. because you have stuff to do later kind of makes it sound like you just want to be friends. Rightly or wrongly, a movie date at someone's house is often shorthand for taking things to a physical level (maybe not sleeping together on date 2, but something, at least,) which ending the date early doesn't leave a lot of room for. If you want to salvage things, maybe ask her out on a more traditional date date.
Unintentially but you came off looking like you are not that interested in her. Think about it, if you are thinking about ending the date and what you are going to do afterwards before even starting the date, what does that tell you.
Text her and tell her that it was not intentional and that you truly want to spend some QUALITY TIME with her and re-schedule it without specifying when the date will end. That's all.
I don't know. Suggesting a Saturday afternoon date that ends at 4 because you have stuff to do later kind of makes it sound like you just want to be friends. If you want to salvage things, maybe ask her out on a more traditional date date.
^^^This.
A mid-Saturday afternoon date that ends because of "errands" may give the impression that you have a date with someone else later that evening.
If you're worried about her staying too long, I would have suggested an evening date for 4-5 hours that would end at a reasonable time of night when people would normally go home and go to bed.
We were planning out our 2nd date to just hang out and have a Walking Dead marathon.
I wonder if you & she had different ideas/expectation of what a "marathon" session of watching a tv program meant ?
Maybe to her, that implied more time than 4-5 hours (maybe 7-8 or more), but to you it only implied viewing a handful of episodes ?
There was nothing inherently problematic in what you said, which is why I'm guessing there was unspoken incongruence between each of your definitions.
Unintentially but you came off looking like you are not that interested in her. Think about it, if you are thinking about ending the date and what you are going to do afterwards before even starting the date, what does that tell you.
Text her and tell her that it was not intentional and that you truly want to spend some QUALITY TIME with her and re-schedule it without specifying when the date will end. That's all.
This is how I read it too. It just seems like he's not that interested in spending time with her and that it's almost a hassle to have to make time in his day to see her. He wants to see her on his terms and his terms only (his house, gone by a certain time). She also could have read it as he just wants to hook up and that it needs to be done in a specific time frame.
Or maybe she thinks you have important stuff to do and doesn't want to be an imposition. Personally, if someone had a time limit on how long they wanted to spend with me I'd assume they weren't that interested in me in the first place.
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