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Old 10-28-2013, 04:12 PM
 
8 posts, read 27,559 times
Reputation: 11

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Hi all, so last week I was out with my friends at a party, and I met this really cute, funny, nice guy. The whole night he kept looking at me, and had talked to me before, making it clear he was interested. And so later I went up to talk to him, and he made it obvious he was interested, flirting and what not, bought me a a drink. His friends said "My friend is really into you." I gave him my number, which I don't normally do, but I did enjoy talking to him. The next morning he textd me, and continued to for the rest week. It was all flirty, funny texts, and he made it very obvious he was interested. He also wanted to know if I was going out again this weekend. On friday I went out, and he knew I was going to be there. When I saw him, he didn't really talk to me much or give me the time of day. When I first saw him, he stopped for a few seconds to say hi, but then said I'll talk to you later, I have to say hi to some friends. I kept on seeing him during the night, and he was looking at me, and he did talk to me a few other times during the night, but very briefly. He texted me while we were out too, saying "hi." I didn't really care too much, because it's not like I was really into him, just sort of a small crush, enjoyed talking to him and he is cute. So when I was leaving I saw him and he wanted to walk me home, so I let him, because it isn't safe to walk home alone where I live. I go to school in another country, btw. So he walked me home and when I opened my gate he came in. I was like "oh ok .. you're coming in then?" I was just planning to make some food and go to sleep, so I invited him for the food. He did end up kissing me, and we just made out a few times. He actually ended up having to throw up in my bathroom twice, and he was really embarrassed about that. I let him sleep it off on my couch and he left a few hours later, since it was too dark to walk home. The next day he texted me, still being flirty and funny. We made plans to hang later that night ,but I cancelled because I was way too tired and wanted to go to sleep. So last night I texted him saying he could come over if he wanted to, when I was done studying. He texted later saying hey what's up, and I invited him over. But he never responded... Sooo I am confused!
I know he normally takes a long time to respond, but it's been like almost a whole day now, and he still hasn't responded. Maybe he ran out of minutes, or didn't see the text. I guess he isn't that interested anymore then...? I guess I am confused becuase I thought he was clearly interested, and then all of a sudden, nothing. And he acted weird on Friday night, by purposely not talking to me, when he had spent the whole week texting me. I'm wondering if he just wanted to have s** and that's it... but I am not sure.
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Old 10-28-2013, 04:14 PM
 
37,626 posts, read 46,026,601 times
Reputation: 57236
Yes. That was it.

How old are you?
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Old 10-28-2013, 04:18 PM
 
8 posts, read 27,559 times
Reputation: 11
22... i guess i'm just upset because i just broke up with someone a few months ago, and this was the first person i had expressed any interest in. :/
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Old 10-28-2013, 04:46 PM
 
8 posts, read 27,559 times
Reputation: 11
I guess I should add that I am upset and confused because I got out of a nasty relationship a few months ago, and this is the first person that I have expressed any interest in. I'm not really looking for a relationship, I was drunk and h**** that night. I'm not one to have a one night stand, I just wanted to make out really. I guess I did have a small crush though, and I've never had to put myself out there before, guys usually come after me.
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Old 10-28-2013, 04:53 PM
 
Location: Davenport, Iowa
2,472 posts, read 4,215,268 times
Reputation: 3432
He probably wasn't happy you cancelled on him and is returning the favor.
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Old 10-28-2013, 05:03 PM
 
37,626 posts, read 46,026,601 times
Reputation: 57236
Quote:
Originally Posted by linym View Post
I guess I should add that I am upset and confused because I got out of a nasty relationship a few months ago, and this is the first person that I have expressed any interest in. I'm not really looking for a relationship, I was drunk and h**** that night. I'm not one to have a one night stand, I just wanted to make out really. I guess I did have a small crush though, and I've never had to put myself out there before, guys usually come after me.
In that condition, you are lucky that you didn't get much more than you bargained for.

And it doesn't matter what you were looking for. Guys don't really respond to "I'm trashed and I just want to make out really". Hopefully you'll learn this quickly.
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Old 10-28-2013, 05:26 PM
 
Location: In bucolic TN
1,706 posts, read 3,310,482 times
Reputation: 2413
Wow, no plan, just wanted to do a little something, not much, had a small crush, wanted to make out a little....

You could have gotten so much more you didn't plan for. Think ahead, anticipate, create boundaries, have an exit strategy, keep him at the door (really, first date and first invitation)? He puked a few times in your toilet, you let him sleep on the couch - really? You are still confused and wanting from your last, nasty relationship. Get some clarity. No dating while drinking unless you are established in a relationship. No inviting someone over on the first date. Discontinue with someone who has such poor drinking discretion that they puke in your toilet. This only gets worse if they puke on you or your furniture. Stay alone when you are drunk and high (again, exit strategy, having best friends to bring you home). Spotty contact at best that night - inconsistency doesn't get better over time, does it?

As Chessie stated, he wanted to hit it and quit it. Let this one keep floating with the tide, find yourself, THEN find another guy who won't cross boundaries.
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Old 10-28-2013, 05:30 PM
 
Location: Riverside Ca
22,146 posts, read 33,558,160 times
Reputation: 35437
You were drunk and high and he threw up in your bathroom? How are you two not married yet? You want a serious relationship? You need to grow up first.

Yes he wanted to hit it because you probably GAVE him all the signals to pound you into silly putty. And that's probably why he doesn't want to deal with you
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Old 10-28-2013, 05:45 PM
 
8 posts, read 27,559 times
Reputation: 11
H**** meant horny, not high. Never gotten high in my life. My bad... but I guess it's all the same. Guess I make bad decisions..
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Old 10-28-2013, 06:50 PM
 
19,969 posts, read 30,236,853 times
Reputation: 40047
Quote:
Originally Posted by linym View Post
H**** meant horny, not high. Never gotten high in my life. My bad... but I guess it's all the same. Guess I make bad decisions..

thats how we learn,,,,we learn the most when we screw up the worst,,
dont be so hard on yourself,,,,it could be a hundred reasons why he is being distant,

it could be his m/o too,,,,,

be distant, then come in for the roll in the hay...
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