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Old 10-28-2013, 10:07 AM
 
45 posts, read 107,333 times
Reputation: 35

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I started hanging out with this guy who happens to be a really good family friend. From the first moment, he was already buttering me up and making me feel special.

Some of the things he'd say:

You're classy, and I need a classy wife

I don't wanna share you, I want you all to myself

Jokingly to his friend "I gotta convince her to marry me but we'll see how that goes"

I could plant a baby inside of you

You're real, beautiful and a good girl. You're not fake or trying to network like some of these other girls.

I've been thinking about you constantly and its driving me crazy

Feels great to truly like someone again

When my brother and friends look at us, they say we look very happy

I'm at work but all I really wanna do is watch TV with you and geek out on graphic design

I just saw you and I miss you already


Other things he'd say:

You don't know me, I can be grimy

You're dealing with a bad boy

You'll either be the one or the one that got away

I think we should take things slow, get to know each other and be friends

Do you know what its like to fall for someone but just not have the time for it?

I can be an a**hole

I had a 3 year plan: pay off the debt and babies of my little brother and sister, start writing again, produce a film, make enough money from the club I work at etc...but that plan did not include you and now you've walked into my life. I've gotta figure this out.



So given all that he's said to me, I'm a bit confused as to where he's coming from and what he wants. When we're not with each other, he's in touch but not as much as he could be. He was so persistent in the beginning but I feel like his interactions with me have quieted down a bit. We've only been seeing eachother for 3 weeks. I was thinking of confronting him about it because I really want to know his deal.

Thoughts?
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Old 10-28-2013, 10:23 AM
 
2,758 posts, read 4,949,573 times
Reputation: 3014
Dude is a total player.
He is telling you many things.

The keys for you to LISTEN to are:
You are dealing with a bad boy
I can be an a*****e.

This guy wants in your pants so bad, and he is trying to butter you up as much as possible to believe him.

Think about it this way, if a woman told a guy the following;
I'm a baaaaaad girl
I can be a real b****
What is being communicTed there ?
Is she communicating to someone that they have good intentions, and that they are interested in you as a person, or is the woman saying, I want to use you for sex, even though I have no plans in my life right now for a man and a relationship. Oh but hey, if it helps me hook up with you, I'll tell you how you are the most amazing person in the world, and hopefully my charm and status and hot looks get me into your pants.

Oh, and by the way, don't be hurt when I hump and dump, cause I TOLD YOU i was a badboy a*****e. You fell for me, when you shouldnt have.
THAT is what this guy is saying.
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Old 10-28-2013, 10:30 AM
 
Location: Up above the world so high!
45,218 posts, read 100,489,477 times
Reputation: 40198
RUN.

FAST.

This guy is a control freak and potential abuser.
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Old 10-28-2013, 10:30 AM
 
Location: The Hall of Justice
25,901 posts, read 42,622,264 times
Reputation: 42767
I wouldn't trust a man who describes himself as a bad boy a-hole who doesn't have time for you. He has big plans? Let him focus on those and judge him accordingly. Meanwhile, date guys whose opening lines don't include multiple reasons for you to pass them over.
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Old 10-28-2013, 10:34 AM
 
Location: Pa
42,763 posts, read 52,766,074 times
Reputation: 25362
Split personality. Get away from him.
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Old 10-28-2013, 10:34 AM
 
Location: Copenhagen, Denmark
10,931 posts, read 11,691,276 times
Reputation: 13170
Oral communication is not his forté. Can he read and write?
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Old 10-28-2013, 10:35 AM
 
Location: New Jersey
12,322 posts, read 17,089,650 times
Reputation: 19556
He sounds conflicted between being the "Bad boy" and the sensitive traditional type. Some can embody some qualities of each but it's rare and the fact he makes so many statements tells me he is unsure what road to go down with this.
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Old 10-28-2013, 10:36 AM
 
Location: Chicago, IL
3,793 posts, read 4,589,140 times
Reputation: 3341
Quote:
Originally Posted by MsLili84 View Post
Thoughts?
My thoughts are that he sounds like a creeper who is trying way too hard. He might even be one of those who fancies himself a PUA.

I'd find someone else, unless this is somehow appealing to you. I don't think you'd be asking for our thoughts if it were, though.
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Old 10-28-2013, 10:38 AM
 
Location: Chicago, IL
3,793 posts, read 4,589,140 times
Reputation: 3341
Quote:
Originally Posted by D. Scott View Post
He sounds conflicted between being the "Bad boy" and the sensitive traditional type.
I don't think he's conflicted about it. I think he heard or read somewhere that women like men who have elements of both, and is awkwardly going about trying really hard to convey this. It doesn't strike me as very genuine.
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Old 10-28-2013, 10:39 AM
 
Location: The Great West
2,084 posts, read 2,615,062 times
Reputation: 4112
"I could plant a baby inside of you"?? How is that supposed to be romantic? If someone said that to me I'd run the other direction.
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