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What was going through your mind when you were having sex with her? Did you imagine that you really wanted to be with her in that moment?
It was very awkward as i stated previously and I was zeroed in on not hurting her or ruining the experience(trip) for myself. I'd just finished my exams and was looking to get away from campus and my then ex, when the vacation was proposed to me. Didnt have a chance to understand the setup....anyway my biggest apprehension was that feelings will get involved and after ending a fruitless relationship, the last thing i wanted was to jump right into another... I was also worried that turning her down (politely or otherwise) would completely ruin the atmosphere. It all happened so fast lol within a short period. I was in my early 20s and had women problems lol....
Had a knack for attracting emotionally scared women and was trying to deviate from that trend so when this situation came up, i was caught off guard...took one for the team all that is water under the bridge now... but i agree, definitely not my finest moment...
Do guys ever take pity on a woman he knows but never had sex with and has sex with her just because he feels pity for her? Like he normally wouldn't have sex with her because he doesn't want to but he feels sorry for her and does it anyway. I'm talking about the first time. Just wondering if that's even possible or exists.
I've discussed this several times with a girlfriend if mine and we can't come to a consensus.
i've never done this and believe it to be really really rare. it can't be pure pity or otherwise you're just going to be pushing rope. for me, all the closing-my-eyes-and-pretending-its-salma-hayek in the world isn't going to change soft serve into a popsicle. i figure it's possible for some guys but i don't think i've ever encountered this in real life
what i think is probably more common is guys sleeping with a girl who they aren't really into, but find "attractive enough to bang." then maybe they say some BS line that it was pity sex to their friends because they are douchebags. the "moped" scenario, basically (fun to ride but don't want your friends to see you on one). bleh
she was a nice person, that i would have under normal circumstances, may be considered dating
how exactly is this pity sex? sounds like regular non monogamous sex to me unless by "normal circumstances" you mean she looked completely different. for me to consider dating someone under other circumstances there has to be a lot more than just pity going on
perhaps we just have different definitions of pity sex. i'm going by the tv/movie trope of a woman sexing some guy who she has no physical attraction to whatsoever because he's so nice/pathetic/terminally ill/whatever
Quote:
Originally Posted by Stagemomma
Yeah, I'm pretty sure pity sex would be a lot more about the sex and not very much about the pity.
I have done this once. On Valentine's Day no less...I was riding up an elevator alone, and a woman came in the elevator too. Not quite my type, heavy in the wrong areas. She made small talk with me and asked me if I had any plans for Valentine's day.
I told her I was thinking of baking Souffle and that she was welcome to share. I ended up sharing a lot more than just Souffle.
I have no problems sexing up a lady friend who is in need of suitable pleasurings when she's feeling down and depressed. I've had women in my life who have had no problems doing the same to me when I've endured my days of depression.
Nothing wrong with having friends who need to get sweaty and physical without all the emotional hodgepodge. This is nothing new, especially if you are a person with an active lifestyle, highly sexual and like being around people. I've known women who have had several different sex partners that have a specific purpose depending on what kinda sex she wants at the time.
There's the guy who's very well endowed who she calls on when nothing but inches will satisfy her.
There's the guy that has a big bag of sexual tricks who she calls on when she desires spice, variety and certain attention to her body.
There's the guy that has the hottest body of all the men she knows when she wants a little more eye candy to go with the sex.
There's the guy that's the life of the party with a good chunk of change, a social gem so to speak who she calls on to take her out on the town and show her a good time with sex to follow later on.
Sometimes really good sex happens when it comes in the form of doing a good friend a favour. You know that it's mainly for a good cause. Helping a good friend in need who thanks you for the deed can be rewarding for both of you as long as the rules are set.
I wouldn't call it pity sex per se, but I had an itch that needed to be scratched. She had the same problem, so we decided to scratch it together. The problem arose when she was wanting it more frequently than I did, and I was feeling that she was becoming too attached. We were texting way more frequently then just two people hooking up. I didn't want to be the guy that was just hitting it and quitting it.
We went back and forth on the casual sex, till I had to imply that this just wasn't working for me. The sex with her was good, but in the back of my mind I knew it meant more to her than it did for me. No matter how many times she told me it was casual, I just had this thought in the back of my mind that I don't need to keep doing this with her.
I can do NSA very easily, but I choose not to do NSA with someone that I feel is becoming attached.
Do guys ever take pity on a woman he knows but never had sex with and has sex with her just because he feels pity for her? Like he normally wouldn't have sex with her because he doesn't want to but he feels sorry for her and does it anyway. I'm talking about the first time. Just wondering if that's even possible or exists.
I've discussed this several times with a girlfriend if mine and we can't come to a consensus.
Pity sex implies that you think you are better or more attractive than that person and are doing them a favor.
I can't recall ever feeling like that about any woman.
I might meet a 5'1" 350 lb woman that I'm not attracted to, but I wouldn't think I'm more attractive than her, so there's no pity. There's just as good of a chance that she's thinks I'm unattractive too, so it's a moot point.
Now, if the question is "This really nice but unattractive woman likes you a lot." Then, I think I would date her. Yes. That hasn't happened though, and it won't.
Do guys ever take pity on a woman he knows but never had sex with and has sex with her just because he feels pity for her? Like he normally wouldn't have sex with her because he doesn't want to but he feels sorry for her and does it anyway. I'm talking about the first time. Just wondering if that's even possible or exists.
I've discussed this several times with a girlfriend if mine and we can't come to a consensus.
I had this last night....ugh!
Oh wait! It wasn't the FIRST time lol!
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