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Old 11-25-2013, 05:29 PM
 
Location: Newport Beach, California
39,044 posts, read 27,462,475 times
Reputation: 15954

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Quote:
Originally Posted by pan zareta View Post
I've been dating a man for about 2.5 years and am 13 weeks pregnant. We have a good relationship but he always told me that he didn't have emotional feelings for me; just more like a best friend. Now that he has found out about the pregnancy he is begging me to marry him. But I don't know if I can see it, because I know he would not consider it otherwise. The pregnancy was not planned but is very wanted after I got over the shock. We are both early 40's so its not like we are kids. I just don't know if I can face being married to someone that I love very much and knowing he does not love me... for the rest of my life.
Nope. Can you spend the rest of your life with a man who doesn't even love you? If you can, that is your choice.
For me, there is no way I can even consider having a relationship with somebody who doesn't care for me.

I've been INSANELY loved by several men and they have given me the greatest joy and pleasure I have ever experienced. I will never give that up.
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Old 11-25-2013, 05:33 PM
 
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,691 posts, read 41,629,721 times
Reputation: 41324
Quote:
Originally Posted by stan4 View Post
But...they ARE sleeping together and enjoying each other's company, etc.
What good is that without LOVE? The fact the OP even questions the man's love should be reason ENOUGH not to marry the guy.
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Old 11-25-2013, 05:37 PM
 
Location: Newport Beach, California
39,044 posts, read 27,462,475 times
Reputation: 15954
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Dissenter View Post
What good is that without LOVE? The fact the OP even questions the man's love should be reason ENOUGH not to marry the guy.
Exactly, with so much doubts, why bother even considering marriage?
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Old 11-25-2013, 05:39 PM
 
Location: DFW
40,936 posts, read 49,025,568 times
Reputation: 54962
Quote:
Originally Posted by strawberrykiki View Post
I disagree. They should get married so the baby can have a stable home?
That's a very good reason to get married. LM's post was spot on.

Married couples should also be the very best of friends. Even if it only lasts 10 years, that's great for the kid.
Time to stop being selfish and do what's right for the kid. Thank goodness my dad married my mom when she got knocked up.
They had 45 good years together.
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Old 11-25-2013, 05:51 PM
 
5,724 posts, read 7,462,499 times
Reputation: 4518
No.
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Old 11-25-2013, 05:52 PM
 
9,408 posts, read 13,715,235 times
Reputation: 20394
Absolutely not. You can co-parent as friends but don't marry him. You will just resent him eventually. Better to break it off now and remain good friends for your child.
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Old 11-25-2013, 06:19 PM
 
2,631 posts, read 7,002,219 times
Reputation: 1408
Quote:
Originally Posted by pan zareta View Post
I've been dating a man for about 2.5 years and am 13 weeks pregnant. We have a good relationship but he always told me that he didn't have emotional feelings for me; just more like a best friend. Now that he has found out about the pregnancy he is begging me to marry him. But I don't know if I can see it, because I know he would not consider it otherwise. The pregnancy was not planned but is very wanted after I got over the shock. We are both early 40's so its not like we are kids. I just don't know if I can face being married to someone that I love very much and knowing he does not love me... for the rest of my life.
Why are you with someone who doesn't love you
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Old 11-25-2013, 07:43 PM
 
5,347 posts, read 7,184,843 times
Reputation: 7158
Um.....No
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Old 11-25-2013, 07:45 PM
 
Location: Pa
42,763 posts, read 52,766,074 times
Reputation: 25362
No.
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Old 11-25-2013, 08:07 PM
 
15,714 posts, read 21,039,892 times
Reputation: 12818
Quote:
Originally Posted by pan zareta View Post
To the poster who was wondering why he is now so insistant on marriage, he is from a different culture that practices arranged marriage, and having a baby out of wedlock is the worst shame that can happen.

I'll probably do it for that reason. He'd be outcasted from his community otherwise. I am just really tired and not feeling good right now and feel like I can't think straight, but this discussion has helped. Thanks to all.
NO WAY!! I would never marry someone who did it out of cultural obligation. He's only marrying you to save face and look like some kind of stand-up guy for his family.

I've seen this story before and it always has the same ending.
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