Stressed/depressed vs Losing interest..what's the difference? (dating, boyfriend, guys)
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Just a observation while reading dating blogs and relationship debates...
What are the main difference between someone losing interest vs them being distant because of them being stressed out or depressed?
Many sites will tell you that when a person is stressed or depressed while in a relationship they will withdraw and slowly stop contacting. Isn't this the same signs as someone who wants to break up with their partner?
I mean even if a person is stressed out or depressed because of a current situation (job loss, sickness, school, custody/ court battles etc) wouldn't they want to at least talk to their significant other because they are one of the main ones who will make them feel better because they love them? How could anyone go without a few days to a couple of weeks without talking to their partner (say they don't live together) and not expect them to feel some type of way? Wouldn't that other person be a door mat? That's just my opinion.
What do you think? How can you tell if someone is just being distant because of stress/ depression vs them wanting out of the relationship?
It might help to post links to the blogs you are looking at.
I think it can be a good measure of a relationship, or of a person's readiness for any relationship -- when stressed, do they draw closer to their partner or more distant?
Well, I am going through this right now with my GF of only a few weeks who has been dealing with a lot of personal issues. She actually warned me about her situation but I continued to pursue her.
I thought I could handle things but I am finding it more difficult than I imagined. I want to be patient and understanding but this is really putting me to the test, particularly so early in our relationship.
I hope I can wait it out, because I think we are worth it.
I've been in a 2-year dance (mostly one-sided, with the effort mainly on my part) with a guy I assumed was only interested in sex and was just a giant player. Turns out he's interested in a lot more than sex, but he's going through a bunch of problems (not of his own making) that have him feeling completely worthless.
So now I've gone from attempting to seduce him to tabling sex and trying to get him to come out of his shell. Depression is one of those things that can strangle everything in your life.
So to you guys who are going thru this currently, what are some of the things that your significant other is doing?
How often do you talk to them? Do they ignore a lot of your calls/text? For days/ weeks? Do they "disappear" for days or weeks"? Do you find they they don't want to hang out with you but they hang out with their friends? Do you find them socializing on social networks when they claim they need time alone?
Or are they completely withdrawn from EVERYONE and EVERYTHING?
Last December I was going through quite a bit of stress with my job, my ex2be and the boyfriend was just being mean. I didn't want to see him because honestly I was so stressed out about my life I couldn't handle his stress. We had many fights over things. He would pick a fight on purpose.
How often do you talk to them? Do they ignore a lot of your calls/text? For days/ weeks? Do they "disappear" for days or weeks"? Do you find they they don't want to hang out with you but they hang out with their friends? Do you find them socializing on social networks when they claim they need time alone?
Or are they completely withdrawn from EVERYONE and EVERYTHING?
Thanks for the links, Mystic.
If my SO disappeared for weeks I would not consider them my SO.
I did have a bf once who had a pattern of 'hiding' as he called it, from time to time. He would not interact for 3 days. I was surprised to learn that he did interact with his friends and family during that time.
I did not really understand this until after I broke up with him and he started doing it with his new gf. Turns out, he hides when he is lying about something significant and/or cheating. He would hide from her, and call me to talk about how he had lied to her. Yeah, I shut that down quick.
So, my advice is don't cut too much slack. And maybe find a partner who is able to deal with stuff straight on, without running away.
So my SO of going on seven years(living together for two) is depressed again, I say again because I now see that he has these phases of depression. I'm frustrated with my own issues and really don't want to continue nursing him through his (for someone that's not ready for marriage).
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