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Old 11-30-2013, 12:31 PM
 
2,087 posts, read 2,843,997 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mikala43 View Post
I think there is a lot of truth in the OP, and I think it may be coupled with a greater sense of entitlement the current generation has.

Perhaps technology has become an enabler of sorts? Those with poor social skills can now turn to tech to get social needs met, as opposed to interacting in real life that would force them to develop social skills more?

There is also a strong love/hate dynamic going on; they want sex/relationships very badly and hate women for depriving.

The thing is, I think their perception is very skewed. I see unattractive men of all sorts in relationships. Of course depending on which bitter guy you talk to it's: lack of money, unattractiveness, lack of college degree, short, etc. which is why they are not getting women.

Basically it is whatever they are lacking that prevents them from getting women.

The whole "women suck but I want one" dynamic bothers me.
OK.

But if this is the case, why are there no 'bitter, whiny' women creating threads?

 
Old 11-30-2013, 12:33 PM
 
Location: Katonah, NY
21,192 posts, read 25,116,307 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JJS99 View Post
OK.

But if this is the case, why are there no 'bitter, whiny' women creating threads?
I don't know. Maybe women complain to their friends?

Whatever the reason - I'm just glad it doesn't affect me!
 
Old 11-30-2013, 12:45 PM
 
Location: State of Transition
102,126 posts, read 107,381,087 times
Reputation: 115942
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dewdrop93 View Post
I don't know. Maybe women complain to their friends?

Whatever the reason - I'm just glad it doesn't affect me!
Women generally just suck it up if they don't get attention from men. They handle it better, generally speaking. We had a thread earlier in which women said that they consider being alone the norm, and on the rare occasion they're in a relationship, it's a pleasant departure from the norm. It seems easier for women to handle single mode. Whereas some of the men here consider a 6-month "dry spell" to be intolerable torture.
 
Old 11-30-2013, 12:46 PM
 
Location: So Cal
52,007 posts, read 52,457,444 times
Reputation: 52520
Quote:
Originally Posted by NilaJones View Post
I think the key thing to realise is that in other relationship forums, including ones with a younger demographic, we don't see this bitterness. It's limited to CD and the PUA forums.




All of this was true back in the 80s, at least in the west coast cities I'm familiar with.

I think what's different now is that there is a small, but very-vocal-on-the-internet group of men who maybe in the past we would have just never heard from. Guys who don't interact with other people in meatspace.

I work with people in their 20s, and I have only ever met one guy like this IRL, out of hundreds.

It seems clear to me from these guys' posts on CD that they have some pretty intense psych issues. Some are on the autism spectrum, some show heavily narcissistic or psychopathic traits, some are just severely depressed.

We are not seeing the feelings of ordinary young men, here. We are seeing guys with neurological irregularities, who don't have enough IRL social experience and perception to see through the BS of PUA, and who take it as gospel. And who have nothing to do but sit online all day and talk to each other in an echo chamber.
I don't see it in real life as much as I do online, but I've seen it in real life too.

I too work with a lot of younger people, men in particular as I'm in a male dominated industry. I've been involved in the hiring process at work as well. I think someone mentioned an entitlement mentality that some young men have, and I think that may be some of that is coming into play here as well, IDK, might also be the disconnect of technology adding a layer of things into the mix..... may be people are also have short attention spans and a instant gratification thing going on too... IDK.....

As far as the changes happening in the 80's, not really the thrust of the thread, I just threw a generic 50 yrs number at it as that's when the push of the equality movement started, generally speaking of course.
 
Old 11-30-2013, 12:47 PM
 
6,732 posts, read 9,976,371 times
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Well, there are more men than women on the autism spectrum, and with psychopathy. Narcissism, too, maybe; I forget.

And men get so much more social conditioning towards entitlement. Did you read that piece by a guy at cracked.com, about how the culture teaches men that they deserve a hot woman, all of them, just for being decent human beings?

I think a big factor in what we see on CD is that people on the autism spectrum have an impaired ability to filter stuff that they read (or hear) for intent. If they read, for example, that women are sexually attracted to money, they often do not ask themselves what the motives are of the person writing this. They just take it as truth. And they repeat it, and other AS guys read it....
 
Old 11-30-2013, 12:49 PM
 
2,087 posts, read 2,843,997 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dewdrop93 View Post
I don't know. Maybe women complain to their friends?

Whatever the reason - I'm just glad it doesn't affect me!
I think part of it, and I can say this about myself, is that men are competitive.

We are ingrained to want to win at things, so rejection hurts us in a different way.

I think that's a possible reason why you have so many 'bitter' men and not so many women. Those guys take those rejections as losses. I'm trying to be more flippant about it myself.

Aside to the whole thread...

BTW, as a self-admitted 'bitter' guy, I know it's a flaw and maybe I'm one of the few that can admit it.

But if you read my body of posts, I have some good qualities. It's not like some others who are bashing bitter men haven't cheated, or been the other man/woman or done other shameless stuff.

So, before you judge any man who whines with such hatred and despise, think about it. Why anyway? It's not like these guys are like child rapists. I mean, I've seen some serious, serious hatred in these threads.
 
Old 11-30-2013, 12:50 PM
 
Location: So Cal
52,007 posts, read 52,457,444 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NilaJones View Post
Well, there are more men than women on the autism spectrum, and with psychopathy. Narcissism, too, maybe; I forget.

And men get so much more social conditioning towards entitlement. Did you read that piece by a guy at cracked.com, about how the culture teaches men that they deserve a hot woman, all of them, just for being decent human beings?

I think a big factor in what we see on CD is that people on the autism spectrum have an impaired ability to filter stuff that they read (or hear) for intent. If they read, for example, that women are sexually attracted to money, they often do not ask themselves what the motives are of the person writing this. They just take it as truth. And they repeat it, and other AS guys read it....
Possibly... I can't attest much to AS as I don't know much about it, other than more cases have developed and or been diagnosed much more as of late... wonder what is causing the increase, but that is probably getting too far away from the OP, at least in terms of relationships, IDK.
 
Old 11-30-2013, 12:52 PM
 
Location: Middle of the valley
48,436 posts, read 34,627,532 times
Reputation: 73580
Quote:
Originally Posted by JJS99 View Post
OK.

But if this is the case, why are there no 'bitter, whiny' women creating threads?
I think Dewdrop is correct. Women have stronger emotional relationships that they can lean on as opposed to the internet.
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Old 11-30-2013, 12:52 PM
 
6,732 posts, read 9,976,371 times
Reputation: 6848
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth View Post
Women generally just suck it up if they don't get attention from men. They handle it better, generally speaking. We had a thread earlier in which women said that they consider being alone the norm, and on the rare occasion they're in a relationship, it's a pleasant departure from the norm. It seems easier for women to handle single mode. Whereas some of the men here consider a 6-month "dry spell" to be intolerable torture.
Very good point.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Chowhound View Post
As far as the changes happening in the 80's, not really the thrust of the thread, I just threw a generic 50 yrs number at it as that's when the push of the equality movement started, generally speaking of course.
That wasn't what I was saying. (I did not explain well.)

I mean that we did not have all these bitter, misogynist, horny guys, even though the listed factors of equality were the same. Therefore I don't think it's about educational and employment equality.

Some men feel threatened by equality, but I don't think it's the population we are talking about here. These guys grew up with it and I don't think they think about it at all. It's just normal to them. Notice how shockingly clueless they are about the history of social movements .
 
Old 11-30-2013, 12:52 PM
 
Location: So Cal
52,007 posts, read 52,457,444 times
Reputation: 52520
Quote:
Originally Posted by JJS99 View Post
I think part of it, and I can say this about myself, is that men are competitive.

We are ingrained to want to win at things, so rejection hurts us in a different way.

I think that's a possible reason why you have so many 'bitter' men and not so many women. Those guys take those rejections as losses. I'm trying to be more flippant about it myself.

Aside to the whole thread...

BTW, as a self-admitted 'bitter' guy, I know it's a flaw and maybe I'm one of the few that can admit it.

But if you read my body of posts, I have some good qualities. It's not like some others who are bashing bitter men haven't cheated, or been the other man/woman or done other shameless stuff.

So, before you judge any man who whines with such hatred and despise, think about it. Why anyway? It's not like these guys are like child rapists. I mean, I've seen some serious, serious hatred in these threads.
I'm not as familiar with your posting history, but the simple fact that you admit you have done bitching in the past makes you sound like a fairly reasonable guy, just what I'm seeing here, and that takes you out of the group of men that I'm addressing.
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