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Now I have to find a way to tell this to my mother who will have a go at me because she always loved my GF.
If you love your girlfriend (you have been together 8 years!) . . . why don't you just marry her and enjoy raising a child together?
Do you not really love her?
Life doesn't always unfold as we envision it. That doesn't mean that the unexpected events can't lead to happiness and fulfillment . . . it all depends on the decisions we make when we come to that crossroads.
Is there some reason NOT to marry your girlfriend and become a family?
Please think about how rare it is to find someone that you really enjoy being around and who truly cares about your future and well-being. If you feel you have that with this person, why toss it all out the window? And your mom - she loves your g/f and she will doubtless love having a grandchild - how blessed you would be to be part of a strong family unit with people who love you and each other.
You have said things that may not be easy to repair . . . your girlfriend may now see you as immature, self-centered, uncaring . . . but you do have time to show her that you sincerely regret flying off the handle.
Just think about it . . . seems you are throwing away a lot of happiness when you could be looking forward to having a wonderful family and living a rich, full life with people who truly care about you.
I'll do it for him:
1) Huge reduction in income
2) Large reduction in flexibility and freedom (to move, travel, (often) change jobs, or even just week to week activities)
3) Great reduction in dating pool size
4) Significant change in how society views you (not always for the better, especially as a single parent)
5) Having to provide (if you do it right) emotional support (in addition to time and money) for a growing being (some thrive on this, many others do not and find it both draining and depressing)
That's for starters.
That doesn't sound like his life is ruined. More like modified, but that's what happens when people make choices. They have to deal with them.
Well it's just that you're so utterly disconnected from reality. Or a sociopath. Or both. You can't **** a woman for 8 years without getting a vasectomy BECAUSE YOU ARE THE ONE WITH YOUR SILLY CONTROL-FREAK RULES and then expect her to get an abortion like a good girl just because you want her to.
There is nothing remotely human about you. At least nothing human any other person of reasonable moral character would want to be associated with. It is preferable to believe you are a troll because the extent to which you display traits of narcissism, selfishness and just plain logical failure is so breathtaking to every thinking person on this site that to believe you are real is just a total downer for the holiday season.
If you are real, please just go away - we can't help you. You're the type of person who turns everything they touch to crap.
I may get banned/reprimanded for that, but come on - this guy is either a troll or so far beyond normal human values that there is no point in trying to help. If he's real and he has fathered a child, well, I'm an atheist, but God help that kid.
I'm voting troll. He writes just like the one who appears with new handles to ask carefully written, spectacularly clueless posts that set all the readers into a tizzy.
Brand-new member comes to a real estate forum to ask people how to make his girlfriend of eight years get an abortion. Uh huh.
It's not your place to decide what is right for her. Sorry, but your "rules" are stupid. If you wanted a guarantee of no kids, you should've had a vasectomy first. You don't have to stay with her or be a part of your child's life, but you do have to be financially responsible for the next 18 years. I hope you make good money and the mom and child get a lot of it, and if you don't make great money I still hope they get a lot of it.
Your sperm fertilized her egg, so you acted like a child and threw a temper tantrum breaking things. I'd have chosen the real child too if I were her.
Brand-new member comes to a real estate forum to ask people how to make his girlfriend of eight years get an abortion. Uh huh.
The one thing that gives me pause about some first-time posters with crazy stories is that city data is the second site that comes up when you search "relationships forum" on Google.
But it's hard not to assume most of these first time posters aren't just regular or semi-regular members looking to stir things up.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,937 posts, read 36,951,955 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by Slanderous
But it's hard not to assume most of these first time posters aren't just regular or semi-regular members looking to stir things up.
Maybe, but I also consider interns for CD being responsible; PR or marketing types as this really is a social media platform and being able to generate discussions on sites (and increase hits/visits) is a marketable skillset.
Maybe, but I also consider interns for CD being responsible; PR or marketing types as this really is a social media platform and being able to generate discussions on sites (and increase hits/visits) is a marketable skillset.
I don't think it would be that profitable to pay someone to come up with a ridiculous story and keep posting about it just to get hits. This forum already generates a lot of traffic even without someone coming up with this crazy stuff.
But I digress. Hopefully the OP is done breaking things.
I'll do it for him:
1) Huge reduction in income
2) Large reduction in flexibility and freedom (to move, travel, (often) change jobs, or even just week to week activities)
3) Great reduction in dating pool size
4) Significant change in how society views you (not always for the better, especially as a single parent)
5) Having to provide (if you do it right) emotional support (in addition to time and money) for a growing being (some thrive on this, many others do not and find it both draining and depressing)
That's for starters.
Let me answer your points:
1. The two of them can combine their incomes and live as a family. Also works better as a tax move as well. The child becomes a dependent on the taxes.
2. Funny how most people are not bothered by your second point. Also it seems that the OP may be doing well where he lives and may not want to move around.
3. Dating pool? He has been with the same girl for 8 years. This is a dating pool of 1.
4. He does not have to be a single parent. They could do what most others do and get married.
5. All these years and everyone else figures it out. I guess the OP is that much differant.
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