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I think big age differences in general aren't that great of a thing, for a lot of reasons... they are usually fine at the 27 and 40 mark, seems OK, it's just when you add about 15 or more yrs later and you've got a fairly young person still with an AARP member... not to be harsh, then of course the health concerns, does this guy want to be 55 and taking care of a 68 yrs old woman.... I don't mean this to be mean and judgemental, just a cold hard reality of life....
It goes both ways, BTW, I say this about an old dude with a much younger woman too...
Things are not that black and white as people age. Even though people develop more health problems as they age, a typical 55 year-old male is also likely to have several age related health concerns like worries of memory, vision and hearing loss; fears of loss of mobility and falls; possibly hypertension and/or diabetes; reduced muscle strength; prostate and urine leakage concerns; etc. http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/242782.php
She would typically have a few more (minus the prostate concerns, of course) at 68, but it's not like the 55 year-older would be a strong and healthy young man trapped in a 55 year-old body. He would be an aging male.
Also, women outlive men and, therefore, tend to be biologically "stronger," in a sense with a longer shelf life. A man's expiration date just comes up sooner. Since a 65 year-old woman living today can expect to live to be 86 (USA Life Expectancy Female), there is little likelihood that she would be old and debilitated at 68.
BTW, the 55 year-older would have long ago qualified for AARP membership at the age of fifty.
Things are not that black and white as people age. Even though people develop more health problems as they age, a typical 55 year-old male is also likely to have several age related health concerns like worries of memory loss; fears of loss of mobility; possibly hypertension and/or diabetes; reduced muscle strength; prostate and urine leakage concerns; etc.
She would typically have a few more (minus the prostate concerns, of course) at 68, but it's not like the 55 year-older would be a strong and healthy young man trapped in a 55 year-old body. He would be an aging male.
Also, women outlive men and, therefore, tend to be biologically "stronger," in a sense with a longer shelf life. A man's expiration date just comes up sooner. Since a 65 year-old woman living today can expect to live to be 86 (USA Life Expectancy Female), there is little likelihood that she would be old and debilitated at 68.
BTW, the 55 year-older would have long ago qualified for AARP membership at the age of fifty.
The general jist of my post was that as we age things go down hill are people prepared for the disparity in the rate of decline...
The specifics don't really matter in the larger scheme of what I was saying....
IF you can get women your own age why don't you just do that... Don't do it unless you cant get laid to save your life with women your own age.
And if you do have to get with a woman that is 13 years older DONT marry her.
Do you give the same advice to a 40 year old man considering dating a 27 year old woman?
Quote:
Originally Posted by bannedontherun
I can relate to OP. when I was 27 I had a 42 year old gf, I probably would have married her but she dumped me. Her neighbors,her sisters,and her Mom and Dad thought she was off her rocker and convinced her it wasn't right,so I lost out.
LOL. That's EXACTLY what I was thinking, Chowhound!
Quote:
Originally Posted by bannedontherun
No... I can relate to OP. when I was 27 I had a 42 year old gf, I probably would have married her but she dumped me. Her neighbors,her sisters,and her Mom and Dad thought she was off her rocker and convinced her it wasn't right,so I lost out.
That's too bad, banned. I know what it's like to have a relationship not turn out the way I would have liked it to.
Last edited by newdixiegirl; 01-01-2014 at 09:50 AM..
Mrs. Chow is an old broad.. .she's like 6 yrs older than me.......
I KNEW there was a reason why I liked you, Chowhound, besides the fact that your posts are sensible and funny (I do love a smart man who can make me laugh ). Just as a matter of interest, has the age difference between you and your wife ever been an issue for either of you, and if so, how did you handle it?
The reason I ask is because I am separated and soon-to-be divorced after 22 years. I met a man at work almost a year ago who has made his interest pretty clear in that time. I'm very drawn to him because of the way he carries himself, his kindness, and because we seem to be on the same wavelength and interested in the same things. He has suggested a couple of times that we go golfing/biking, but I don't want to go on any dates until my divorce is final. I've been telling him that I would like to do that sometime, without making firm plans (until recently, he didn't know I was still married as we hadn't discussed this, and I don't usually offer a lot of information about myself unless someone asks).
But another reason why I haven't felt ready to go out with him is because he's younger, and in fact 7 years younger! It has never even occurred to me that I would EVER be interested in a younger man beyond pure physicality (my soon-to-be ex is 12 years older), so no one could be more surprised by this than I.
The thing is, I'm not sure if he realizes how old I am (I'm 47 and he's 40) and how he would feel once he does know. I myself feel uncomfortable with the age difference, so I certainly can understand if he were to feel uncomfortable with it. On the other hand, it has been SO long since I've felt this way and since I've honestly felt that I would consider being in another relationship.
Hello. I am a 27 year old male never been married no kids. Im a good looking guy finding and dating beautiful women has never been a problem for me.
Last year I met a woman, 40 years old. Looks 30. Never married no kids. We fell in love quick. And im old enough to know it wasnt puppy love. We even took vacations together split it traveled hike. We were truly in love. Never did those things with a partner before.
Now that its been a year its crap or get off the pot and I need to marry this girl. But now I have cold feet. Not only am I only 27 so I would be giving up everything because I only want one successful marriage but we would have to have kids NOW because of her age. Also what happens when I am 35 years old and she will be 48. Wont that make me resent her?
I feel so terrible, I told her. But its so sad. She is such an amazing person if only she was 35 or I was 35. And now she may never have kids. I care for this person deeply but I feel like down the road it could turn ugly. Please help.
"What if", "Down the road", "I should have, would have, could have"............
Very few and small words that have always made a big impact on humans lives.
What if you get married and you get killed on your honeymoon.
Do you seriously think she is not going to remarry?
Down the road a spider bites her and she loses her leg to infection.
Are you going to resent her because she got sick and lost her leg?
I should have married her if I would have not over analyzed every moment of my life then I could have been happy right now instead of wallowing in my self created misery without her.
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.
). Just as a matter of interest, has the age difference between you and your wife ever been an issue for either of you, and if so, how did you handle it?