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I had a prior post from earlier this year, where it was coming to light that I would be getting divorced primarily due to my cat allergies (my ex-wife is a veterinarian and huge animal lover). Needless to say, that did happen and I've now been divorced for about eight months.
I have been on a few dates with women from my social circle, but nothing too serious or promising. I have looked into trying online dating, but I am not sure how to handle that with pet allergies.
The situation as it stands right now is that I am very allergic to cats and also allergic to dogs, but less so with certain breeds. I believe I could probably live with a poodle mix dog breed if I kept on daily allergy medicine, used HEPA filters, kept the pets out of the bedroom, etc. Cats and most other dog breeds, I can visit for a few hours in their presence but I could never live with them. I don't have a reaction that will send me to the hospital, but get a miserable amount of congestion, itchy eyes, sinus headaches, etc. which will eventually morph into a sinus infection if I stay in their presence.
I am currently and have been taking allergy desensitization shots for almost five years now. I take Allegra and Nasonex daily. I've discussed with the Dr. the fact they aren't helping much with the pet allergies and he basically said he is doing everything he can for me and not everyone responds well (he has already upped my dose above the normal maximum). Given the length of time I've been doing the shots, he said I have already reaped whatever benefit is to be gained (not much, at least in regards to pets) and I shouldn't expect further improvement related to the shots.
Being in my early thirties, nearly everyone who is single has either a cat or a dog. Do I just exclude these people all together? If I'm doing online dating, so I skip messaging them entirely? or do I disclaim in my profile? It just seems like the vast majority of the dating pool would be excluded in that case.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
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Just exclude people with pets. Not sure if you're in a more rural area, but living in a urban area I find most people don't have pets as most apartments forbid them or charge extra for them. Please, people aren't home that much. Absolutely put it in your profile.
I, myself, have fairly bad cat allergies but there has only been one woman in the past five years that I met that I wanted to date that had a cat.
Seriously, if you have severe allergies, you don't have any choice but to limit your dating to people who don't have pets/don't have pets that are ever indoors/are also allergic.
My brother has a cat allergy and is married to a cat lover. His allergies are mild enough that over a few years, he did become desensitized to her cat, but it's not a situation where he was ever in respiratory distress. It was important enough to him to stay with her that he dealt with the level of uncomfortability being around her cat caused, because it was manageable enough, in his opinion. But this isn't going to be everybody.
I think you should include your allergy in your profile. I have 2 small dogs and I would rather not meet someone like you at all then meet you, really like you, and then be disappointed nothing could come of it because I have dogs.
I'm a dog lover and have one myself. But like you, I have bad allergies to cats and dogs. Couple of questions. Is your allergies really bad? My brother gets licked by a cat or dog and breaks out in hives. He can play with them, but has to wash his hands/face immediately after. But the saliva and dander do him in, so he could never live with a dog/cat. He too did the shots bit because he was dating a dog walker that he really liked (she didn't have any pets herself). But enough fur/dander was on her clothes, it was bad. And when he allowed one of the dogs to lick him, yikes. Bad.
Myself, I build a tolerance to them. I was on 3 meds when I got my puppy. One year later, I'm fine. My dog that passed away recently, I was so congested for 2.5 weeks that if I swallowed, my ears would pop. That's bad. But I realized I build a tolerance for them. Not sure about cats though. The one cat I had gave me allergy-induced asthma. Had to give her away cuz I couldn't breathe and back then, they didn't have the safer, better meds they have today.
If you're extremely allergic, I'd just write that you have bad allergies and can't date anyone with a pet....at all.
Myself, I have yet to date anyone that has animals that I'm around a lot. The friends I have with animals, I just make sure to bring my inhaler with me and wash my hands...a lot, then change my clothes as soon as I get home. That usually works. If I dated someone with a cat/dog, I'd probably see if I could build a tolerance to it. If not, I'd probably have to say good-bye.
I know in my world, love me, love my dogs. I won't make rules for them, just because you're in my life. So you need to accept them on my couch, on my bed, etc. I wouldn't expect anyone else to bend their rules for me...and if they did, I'd feel bad and wouldn't allow it.
I think you should include your allergy in your profile. I have 2 small dogs and I would rather not meet someone like you at all then meet you, really like you, and then be disappointed nothing could come of it because I have dogs.
Ditto....there is no way in hell I could date a person like you! It must be awful for you to be like this.
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