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Old 01-15-2014, 05:35 AM
 
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I know that when a woman marries a man in the USA traditionally she takes her husband's last name. More modern women may just add the husband's last name and have a double family name and there are some women that keep their maiden name. My question is about gay couples getting married. What is the norm with the last names? Does each person keep their former name or do they have a combined last name of some kind or does one partner change their name? Also what about any children that they share? What last name do the children have?
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Old 01-15-2014, 06:13 AM
 
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“Before I came out and was still on a path of planning to marry a man,” says Victoria, “I was pretty radical and said I’ll never change my name." But when Victoria Cunningham married Lita Grossman, in Washington D.C. in 2006, three years before same-sex marriage was legally recognized in the District, she was forced to reconsider. Finally, both wound up changing to a third surname." - Huffington Post Article.

Gay Marriage and Changing Surnames


Gay Marriage And Changing Surnames


There are a number of articles on this. Simply type in your browser 'gay marriage and children changing surnames.'
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Old 01-15-2014, 06:25 AM
 
Location: a primitive state
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All of the married gay people I know kept their names. When you've established yourself as a professional under your name, it's confusing to change it. That's one reason many women keep them.
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Old 01-15-2014, 06:39 AM
 
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I know a gay couple who married and decided to legally change their last name to something completely new. They have since then adopted a child and the child of course has that same name. It was very important for them to have a family name that they all shared.
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Old 01-15-2014, 07:23 AM
 
Location: Up in the air
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ellie View Post
All of the married gay people I know kept their names. When you've established yourself as a professional under your name, it's confusing to change it. That's one reason many women keep them.
I have a few married gay couple friends and most of them just made up a new name or kept their own...I don't think any of them took the other's name.

I'm not going to be getting married, but if it was a possibility I wouldn't be changing my name.
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Old 01-15-2014, 07:27 AM
 
27,332 posts, read 34,228,314 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JetJockey View Post
I have a few married gay couple friends and most of them just made up a new name or kept their own...I don't think any of them took the other's name.

I'm not going to be getting married, but if it was a possibility I wouldn't be changing my name.
I said that too. But I changed my mind after I had my son - too many issues with schools and doctors and dentists....easier for us to have the same name. So I changed it, for my son. I still use that name, and I have been divorced for years. For me it's more about me and him....I don't really care what our last name is, as long as it is the same.
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Old 01-15-2014, 07:29 AM
 
Location: Up in the air
19,116 posts, read 27,187,062 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ChessieMom View Post
I said that too. But I changed my mind after I had my son - too many issues with schools and doctors and dentists....easier for us to have the same name. So I changed it, for my son. I still use that name, and I have been divorced for years. For me it's more about me and him....I don't really care what our last name is, as long as it is the same.
There's a good change I can't physically have children, and I have a genetic disorder regardless so it's probably best I didn't.

So I don't really have to worry about that.
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Old 01-15-2014, 07:31 AM
 
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My children will carry my name. Not some hyphenated monstrosity.
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Old 01-15-2014, 08:37 AM
 
Location: Middle America
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They gay couples I know who have married (who are mostly women) are a mixed bag. Some have chosen one party's surname, some have both retained their respective last names, and some are using both people's last name. Of the male married couples I know, they are more likely to just retain their last names...it's the female couples where it's more mixed. But, overall, like the married straight couples I know...it's just pretty individual to the couple.

I'm straight, getting married in a few days, and am changing my name. I've been saddled with one of the most common last names in the world for more than thirty years, I'm looking forward to something slightly more distinctive. I used to be a print journalist, and if I were still doing that, I'd still write under my previous byline, but really, I have no strong feelings about NOT changing my name.
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