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Old 01-15-2014, 10:21 AM
 
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In another thread there is a debate going on about which is worse... women getting spammed with messages that are often nothing more than lewd or minimal "sup" at best or men who don't even get contacted at all. I think the reality is both options stink... who cares which is "worse."

In the middle of it all (and sharing my experience when I did OLD), I said it would be interesting if there was a dating website where men get to register for free, women pay, but only women can contact men (men can't contact women). That would eliminate the spamming women hate so much... and in return men would be contacted by women who are interested in them (there would be no need to feel like you have to play a numbers game and be frustrated by no answers).

Then I googled and found there actually is such a site! It's pretty obscure though, I never even heard of it until today. And I am curious on people's opinions on this kind of thing. I am dating someone now, so I am not going to try it. But on the surface, it sounds like an interesting take on OLD. I can't find much wrong with the concept, but I am sure I am overlooking something. Also, it looks like they charge everyone though (both men and women).

Here are the details about the site (there is more on the site, but I picked up a few highlights):

Quote:

Similar to the Sadie Hawkins dance, HerWay lets women make the first move. HerWay also differentiates itself from other sites by providing women with an unprecedented amount of discretion as they search for Mr. Right: All female profiles are private and are only be revealed to the men of their choosing.
Quote:

Let us emphasize this point: while the site is built on the premise that online dating connections are five time more likely when a woman makes the first move, the benefits in your favor are phenomenal.
You know, just as we do, that on traditional dating sites, women are like celebrities– receiving so much mail its almost impossible to decipher between genuinely interested guys and those who send out copy-and-paste messages to any lady in a 100 mile radius. We know that it’s not just frustrating for women, but for you too! What are the chances you’ll make a connection if you’re fighting against a sea of other guys?

(We've) changed the direction of the tide: letting women take the lead, allowing only them to send out connections to the guys she’s interested in. When you receive a message, you’ll know you’ve already passed the first test.. what a relief, right? If you’re interested, you two can continue to flirt, send messages, and ultimately set up a date!

Plus, (we) will be your personal dating coach — letting you know how your profile holds up compared to other guys on the site.
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Old 01-15-2014, 10:25 AM
 
Location: Hartford CT
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Not a bad idea, but I wonder how many women would register for it.
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Old 01-15-2014, 10:26 AM
 
14,065 posts, read 14,165,431 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jillabean View Post
In another thread there is a debate going on about which is worse... women getting spammed with messages that are often nothing more than lewd or minimal "sup" at best or men who don't even get contacted at all. I think the reality is both options stink... who cares which is "worse."

In the middle of it all (and sharing my experience when I did OLD), I said it would be interesting if there was a dating website where men get to register for free, women pay, but only women can contact men (men can't contact women). That would eliminate the spamming women hate so much... and in return men would be contacted by women who are interested in them (there would be no need to feel like you have to play a numbers game and be frustrated by no answers).
I don't have an issue initiating contact with men, but I'd have a problem with any site that required women to pay but not men.

If you want control over who can contact you, just use Tinder or eHarmony.
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Old 01-15-2014, 10:34 AM
 
5,121 posts, read 5,986,990 times
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Originally Posted by Raptor76 View Post
Not a bad idea, but I wonder how many women would register for it.
They claim their numbers are 50/50 ... but anyone can claim anything. Personally, if I were single and looking to date (and wanted to try online dating again) I would use it.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sweet Like Sugar View Post
I don't have an issue initiating contact with men, but I'd have a problem with any site that required women to pay but not men.

If you want control over who can contact you, just use Tinder or eHarmony.
It's kind of like ladies night... but for men . My thought was you had to compensate men somehow for having no control. It would suck to pay for a site, not be able to contact anyone, and (if you weren't successful) then get no messages to boot.

But it looks like the site that "does" offer this charges both women and men. Not sure what the rates are though.

Never tried Tinder, but I didn't like eHarmony because I couln''t contact who I wanted to--it was very limiting. It assigns you people and most of the people it "assigned" me were dead profiles (no pictures and such). Plus, that's the site where I met the most married men looking to cheat. I think they like it because you can't search for them (re: their wives can't search for them).

Match is better I think. You can contact and choose to ignore the spam messages I suppose, but that doesn't help the men who feel the need to spam just to compete.
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Old 01-15-2014, 10:37 AM
 
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I do it anyways, so no big deal.
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Old 01-15-2014, 10:44 AM
 
14,065 posts, read 14,165,431 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jillabean View Post

It's kind of like ladies night... but for men . My thought was you had to compensate men somehow for having no control. It would suck to pay for a site, not be able to contact anyone, and (if you weren't successful) then get no messages to boot.


But it looks like the site that "does" offer this charges both women and men. Not sure what the rates are though.

Never tried Tinder, but I didn't like eHarmony because I couln''t contact who I wanted to--it was very limiting. It assigns you people and most of the people it "assigned" me were dead profiles (no pictures and such). Plus, that's the site where I met the most married men looking to cheat. I think they like it because you can't search for them (re: their wives can't search for them).

Match is better I think. You can contact and choose to ignore the spam messages I suppose, but that doesn't help the men who feel the need to spam just to compete.
The incentive for men should just be getting contacted by women- not a free membership on top of that. lol I don't like eHarmony either and everyone just seems to want to hook up on Tinder. There should be a Tinder-like site for relationship minded singles that requires both people to agree to any communciation before it's allowed.
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Old 01-15-2014, 10:44 AM
 
4,611 posts, read 4,158,498 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jillabean View Post
They claim their numbers are 50/50 ... but anyone can claim anything. Personally, if I were single and looking to date (and wanted to try online dating again) I would use it.



It's kind of like ladies night... but for men . My thought was you had to compensate men somehow for having no control. It would suck to pay for a site, not be able to contact anyone, and (if you weren't successful) then get no messages to boot.

But it looks like the site that "does" offer this charges both women and men. Not sure what the rates are though.

Never tried Tinder, but I didn't like eHarmony because I couln''t contact who I wanted to--it was very limiting. It assigns you people and most of the people it "assigned" me were dead profiles (no pictures and such). Plus, that's the site where I met the most married men looking to cheat. I think they like it because you can't search for them (re: their wives can't search for them).

Match is better I think. You can contact and choose to ignore the spam messages I suppose, but that doesn't help the men who feel the need to spam just to compete.

Like Raptor, I'm skeptical about the numbers. No way do I see women signing up for a site where they have to do the messaging.

Regardless, I signed up. Out of curiosity, if nothing else. If I remember, I'll post my experience
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Old 01-15-2014, 10:47 AM
 
4,611 posts, read 4,158,498 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sweet Like Sugar View Post
The incentive for men should just be getting contacted by women- not a free membership on top of that. lol I don't like eHarmony either and everyone just seems to want to hook up on Tinder. There should be a Tinder-like site for relationship minded singles that requires both people to agree to any communciation before it's allowed.
Jilla's right, men would absolutely LIVID if they paid for a site, were unable to contact anyone, and still didn't receive any messages. The promise of maybe getting contacted isn't incentive enough. There's really no fair, profitable way to do this that I can think of.
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Old 01-15-2014, 10:49 AM
 
4,611 posts, read 4,158,498 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sweet Like Sugar View Post
I don't have an issue initiating contact with men, but I'd have a problem with any site that required women to pay but not men.
If that's the case, you wouldn't need to worry about a new site like this. You could go to any other site and do the messaging and have equal, if not greater success.
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Old 01-15-2014, 10:49 AM
 
14,065 posts, read 14,165,431 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hivemind31 View Post
Jilla's right, men would absolutely LIVID if they paid for a site, were unable to contact anyone, and still didn't receive any messages. The promise of maybe getting contacted isn't incentive enough. There's really no fair, profitable way to do this that I can think of.
So make it a free site then.
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