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Old 01-19-2014, 08:48 AM
 
26,142 posts, read 31,176,077 times
Reputation: 27237

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No.

Men who are secure with who they are and happy with themselves do not find 'beautiful women' an issue in terms of approaching or dating.

"Beautiful" is also a relative term. What you consider beautiful may not be what another person finds 'beautiful.'

I know and dated a man who possessed many of the physical qualities men post about in here as being negative and he was secure with who he was, and was fun and happy and sociable with everyone, and had many interests activities one would have outside of a relationship. That is what set him apart from all other people. He also remarked, "There's more to a relationship than just sex."

In my social circle, he was a very in-demand bachelor. He married a wonderful person and a very good looking woman in everyone's opinion - both physically and in personality. It was a great fit.
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Old 01-19-2014, 09:00 AM
MJ7
 
6,221 posts, read 10,729,615 times
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I'd say most guys aren't intimidated by the good looks (some might be, but few) they are more intimidated by either A. high maintenance or B. your success, some guys cannot date women that make more money than them.
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Old 01-19-2014, 09:55 AM
 
Location: Nashville, TN -
9,588 posts, read 5,836,586 times
Reputation: 11116
Quote:
Originally Posted by Albert_The_Crocodile View Post
These are the two posts that really resonated with me.

OP, you sound like a really nice, interesting woman, but one thing I learned from experience over the years is that an awful lot of women who are really beautiful in the classic sense often turn out to be not very interesting people. They often tend to place much more importance on how they look than on who they are on the inside, and once you get to know them, you come to find that the only things that are really beautiful about them are their face and their body. Whereas on the other hand, some of the most absolutely amazingly attractive women I've ever met were women who many other men didn't even notice, but - once I talked to them and got to know them even for just a few minutes - turned out to be so utterly fascinating all I wanted to do was just sit there and listen to them tell me more about who they were and what made them tick.

It's not that I was intimidated by beautiful women; I just learned over the years that they usually weren't all that attractive once you got to know them, so I usually didn't bother. I know this bias of mine isn't always accurate, but it proved true often enough that I did let it affect who I approached for much of my life. I met my wife over the internet, and got to know her over a period of several years before she ever showed me a picture, but if I'd known what she looked like when I first "met" her online, I have to admit I probably wouldn't have been too interested. Which is part of the reason she didn't show me a photo until I was already head over heels in love with her. She wanted me to want her for who she was, not what she looked like. So yeah, this preconception is certainly not always accurate, but I lived by it for years, and I think a lot of other men do as well. For better or worse.

But as I said, you really sound like a very nice, down to earth, interesting person. If there's a guy with whom you're "smitten," as you put it, I say go for it. Make a move of some sort, even if it's just dropping a hint about being single or something like that. Sometimes the nicest guys, and the best catches, are just really shy and need a little help getting out of the starting gate. Best of luck to you; I hope it works out really well for you!
Albert,

I really wish more men on CD would offer such well-written, intelligent, respectful and enjoyable posts like this one!
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Old 01-19-2014, 12:15 PM
 
Location: SoCal
148 posts, read 292,260 times
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In my experience, if you're not approachable, no matter how hot you are, you will rarely get asked out, because guys are scared of being rejected (especially better looking ones). It's actually funny watching below average guys ask out really hot women over the hot guys asking them out...because they have nothing to lose.
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Old 01-19-2014, 12:18 PM
 
26,142 posts, read 31,176,077 times
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Many men who should be attracted to women, the OP describes in her thread, aren't because they know they are vapid and a waste of time.
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Old 01-19-2014, 12:19 PM
 
5,347 posts, read 7,196,428 times
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"Beautiful" like "successful" is subjective and I hear both often used as reasons by women on why aren't where they want to be when it comes to men
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Old 01-19-2014, 12:24 PM
 
Location: H-Tine, Texas
6,732 posts, read 5,169,444 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Thursday007 View Post
Many men who should be attracted to women, the OP describes in her thread, aren't because they know they are vapid and a waste of time.
This guy. He gets it.
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Old 01-19-2014, 12:30 PM
 
15,013 posts, read 21,642,088 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ATG5 View Post
This guy. He gets it.
That's a woman.
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Old 01-19-2014, 12:31 PM
 
3,452 posts, read 4,616,330 times
Reputation: 4985
Most men usually ASSUME that if you are an attractive woman you are taken. It is rare to meet a good looking woman that is not dealing with at least one man. So that is the reason why you are not getting as many straighforward invitations from men.

My advice:

Work on YOUR physical cues to let men know you are interested and available. If you talk to him and act like every other woman he meets than you will get the same treatment that every other woman gets. But if you smile, make eye contact, and learn how to ask men questions they will pick up pretty quickly.

I have a feeling that you are not doing some of these things.

AND PLEASE stop saying that men are INTIMIDATED by you.

Only a loser of a man would be SCARED of a woman.

There are men that may be afraid of rejection...but VERY FEW that are INTIMIDATED by you.
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Old 01-19-2014, 12:32 PM
 
15,013 posts, read 21,642,088 times
Reputation: 12334
Beautiful is the new ugly.
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