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My husband is friends with one of his exes whom he dated twice, once in the 1990’s and once in the 2000’s. From what he told me, she has the emotional maturity of a teenager. From his own personal experience, she is selfish and she does what she wants to do when she wants to do it and when it suits her. She would act like a diva. She broke up a while ago with a friend of my husband, but this is not the first time this has happened. According to my husband, they have a long history of dating and breaking up. According to him, she has come to him in the past after her breakups wanting a shoulder to cry on. She also has had a difficult time getting over the breakup. She would wallow in her pain I have met her. All of us are in our forties.
The last time she broke up with the friend of my husband, she sent him a text stating that. His response was ‘Why are you texting me? What do you want me to do? I am married. There is not much that I can do. I am a Christian. You keep on dating him and breaking up with him. I would not know how to help you except to pray for you.’ She continued to text him when he and I were at home. Her texts included… hi, what are you doing? Good night. Have you spoken to *person*? He would just read the text and then delete it.
According to my husband, she has not texted him about her breakup.
Recently she texted about the fact that her niece was admitted to the hospital. Turns out her niece has leukemia. She has been texting my husband updates regarding her niece. She also asked him to pray for her niece.
Should I be concerned about anything regarding the entire situation?
Yes.... however your husband has done the right thing and has confronted her in a forthright manner.
Men must build "hedges" in their lives, and your husband did that by giving her the straight truth. Good on him. Now would be good time to reinforce your respect for him.
My husband is friends with one of his exes whom he dated twice, once in the 1990’s and once in the 2000’s. From what he told me, she has the emotional maturity of a teenager. From his own personal experience, she is selfish and she does what she wants to do when she wants to do it and when it suits her. She would act like a diva. She broke up a while ago with a friend of my husband, but this is not the first time this has happened. According to my husband, they have a long history of dating and breaking up. According to him, she has come to him in the past after her breakups wanting a shoulder to cry on. She also has had a difficult time getting over the breakup. She would wallow in her pain I have met her. All of us are in our forties.
The last time she broke up with the friend of my husband, she sent him a text stating that. His response was ‘Why are you texting me? What do you want me to do? I am married. There is not much that I can do. I am a Christian. You keep on dating him and breaking up with him. I would not know how to help you except to pray for you.’ She continued to text him when he and I were at home. Her texts included… hi, what are you doing? Good night. Have you spoken to *person*? He would just read the text and then delete it.
According to my husband, she has not texted him about her breakup.
Recently she texted about the fact that her niece was admitted to the hospital. Turns out her niece has leukemia. She has been texting my husband updates regarding her niece. She also asked him to pray for her niece.
Should I be concerned about anything regarding the entire situation?
Apparently the woman is a $lut - one who is motivated only by her sexual appetites and thus dangerous to anyone who wants to keep and enjoy a happy home. If you play with fire you will surely get burned.
A $lut is like a black hole - always sucking everyone they know into their personal problems. They do not own their problems and are expert at manipulating others into participation in their debauched life style.
They should be avoided like the plague they are. Until and unless they realize what a pariah they are - a sinner in the eyes of God and mankind - they cannot and will not be saved. Helping them doesn't help. They must be allowed to fall face down into the dirt - alone.
Always remember - when you help a troubled $lut she will remember you when she is in trouble again.
and that's just me, hollering from the choir loft...
Your husband does not 'owe' this woman a further explanation for his lack of availablilty ... nor should he offer one or engage in any further discussion with her. If she responds to his rebuttal by 'going away', then there is no further problem. But, from what you have said, my suspicion is that she will not give-up. Therefore, your husband should 'only' respond with "go away and don't bother me again!"
snugglegirl05, based on the headings of these threads you've started since 10-13, your husband's female friends seems an issue.
Husband's ex girlfriend 1/19/14
snugglegirl05
Husband's female friend wanted help 1//4/14
snugglegirl05
Husband's female friend needing help 12/12/13
snugglegirl05
Husband's ex female friend's behavior 10/27/13
snugglegirl05
And this one,
Married pastor and other church member had the hots for a divorced female member
snugglegirl05
I wish you the best.
My husband already knows my feelings regarding his female friends behavior. He has taken steps to prevent more problems. Yet some of his female friends "do not want to or just do not get" the message he is sending to them *meaning his ex girlfriend*
At that point what do you do?
He told me that he wants to show his ex girlfriend what it means to be a Christian and treat her the way that Jesus would treat her.
There is one thread that does not belong in this post... the married pastor and other church member had the hots for a divorced female member. My husband is not a pastor.
No!! Although she may have been an ex, he will still have had a relationship with her niece. He may have lost love and affection with his ex, but with someone who hasn't 'hurt' him in an emotional, who he may have been close with, he will still have an an affection for.
Even though I don't like my ex, if I found out her niece was ill, I'd be devastated, she had nothing to do with the break-up and did nothing wrong, therefore I haven't lost my affection for the girl. She was apart of my life, and was a sweetheart. Just because I no longer see her, or speak to any of her family, I would want to know if she had an illness, so i can send my wishes, and I;d actually visit her.
Forget the way she has gone about texting your husband. Yes, she had no reason to message him before the new, unless she had feelings for him. However, this is terrible news, and anyone that has been in that childs life, and I'm guessing your husband was for a while, would want to be updated after the news.
There is nothing to worry about.
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