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It hasn't worked for me so far, but I will admit that my profile needs work. I rarely receive responses to my messages, so I will back off of it for a little bit.
eh, guys I met through friends or out and about were even MORE emotionally unavailable than guys I met online. Met one guy through a friend who was incredibly insecure and was practically ready to marry me before even one date. Not sure why he was so insecure, he was loaded and incredibly smart and social...but he turned me off. I never even ran into men like that from online. Blech.
It was a rhetorical statement, trying to make a point that having a 'decent' profile doesn't cut it for the average man. Which is why they remain frustrated on websites for months on end.
I agree. Sure hasn't worked for me.
Quote:
Originally Posted by timberline742
Huh, I guess I don't know what it is. I turn my profile on (when I feel like dating again), get some messages, send some messages, make a few meetings and if something comes out of one of them then great. Simple. I kept my OKC profile up two weeks about a month ago, did four dates, and one has promise. We're going to dinner Friday (fourth meeting). Is that not a true date? I don't know if it will go anywhere, but she's cool.
Sure it does, or it does for the guys I know. But if you're profile isn't working, improve it.
Though, from the messages I see that my female friends get, it seems the real problem for tons of guys is that they seem completely unable to carry on any real conversation via the written word.
That's pretty hard to do when you (a) can't get a response, and/or (b) the other party seems to have no interest in carrying their half of the conversation.
Most people date until they find the one they want to marry. It's not like you decide, "I want to get married now" and marry the next person you date. Of course there are going to be a string of relationships in the mean time.
I get that there will likely be string of dates or relationships but I wouldn't want to touch a man who slept with most of the women they casually dated like that.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
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Quote:
Originally Posted by flathead4
That's pretty hard to do when you (a) can't get a response, and/or (b) the other party seems to have no interest in carrying their half of the conversation.
There will always be some people that aren't interested. You converse with the ones that do engage. That should be obvious. If you can't get ANYONE to engage, then there is an issue with your profile (most likely), who you are (maybe), your intro messages, or your location... or perhaps who you are messaging. If you're not getting approached by women at all though (I get an intro email from a woman for probably every 2 or 3 I send), then likely your profile or who you are is the issue.
If one of those relationships ended it was just a relationship that shouldn't have led to marriage.
When people ask me if I "want to get married", my first retort is "to you?". Getting married for the sake of getting married does not make any sense to me.
So often in dating I found that many women have an idea of the family they want, the house, the lifestyle, etc and they're just looking for the man to plug in the wedding picture. It's incredibly insulting and a huge turn off.
I call that 'having a husband shaped hole to cram an unsuspecting man into'
Honestly, though, I've never yet met a man who was unsuspecting! They tend to be overly so. I tell men I'm looking for the right guy and we will define our relationship to match. But they rarely believe me OR they have their own wife shaped hole they want to fit me into. It works both ways!
LoL, I dated a man last summer who responded that he thought he had a "sex shaped hole" he was trying to plug! At least he was man enough to admit it, and I respected that.
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