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It's hard when I am still in love with him, to this day.
He puts me down, talks down to me, degrades me, lies to me. Yet, I take his verbal abuse, all because I love him.
That is not love what keeps you around him. Love is something what does not contain abusing from any party.
You might miss what he was when you were in love together and he was good to you, you might love the feeling of being in love itself, you might be afraid of losing someone you once loved. It is fear which keeps you thinking you love him, but that is not love. Love does not cry, it laughs in a good way. Love does not equal misery.
Love puts you up, love talks you up, love honor you, love is the truth. Don't waste time with someone who took love away from your live. You already forgot what it is. Give your love to someone who brings it back to you, as wonderful gift it is
Throughout your thread you made comments recognizing that your choices might not be the best for you. For whatever reason, you seem to have lost your sense of self-worth in my opinion and you need to find a way to get it back. Honestly, I think a couple of good counselling sessions would help you. If you have decent health insurance, it might even cover some sessions. Sometimes we need help with our issues and there's nothing wrong with that.
I'm working on it... going to see a counselor, that is. *hugs*
You are thinking way too much about this man and not thinking about YOUR OWN health. This is both physically and mentally very unhealthy for you. Try to look at things from that perspective and let go of this man.
The more you keep contact with this guy, the more you hurt yourself. You need to cut 100% contact, go through the grieving period and then you'll be over this guy and ready for someone new to enter your life.
He is coming over and contacting you in other ways, because he is stringing you along and using you.
Is is very difficult to just stop loving a person. The feelings don't just turn it off like a faucet (like folks believe/hope they will).
You may not stop loving him (I won't stop loving my exSO), but when love isn't reciprocated, it's best to put those feelings in a box on a shelf in your heart.
Find your happiness rather than expect another person to "make" you happy. As you describe him and your relationship, you weren't happy with him - maybe just afraid to be alone. (???)
That seems to be her problem. She wants to be happy right now and not take into consideration things like the rest of her life. Sometimes it's better to be miserably in the present if that means moving on from a bad relationship. Not being happy right now would be a horrible reason to get back with Mr. Bad News. You might want to listen to those around you. They seem to see him better than you do, OP.
To the OP: that's an excellent decision to see a counselor. After you've had several sessions, please come back online and let us know what you're finding out about yourself: your growing up years, where you are now, and where you want to go as you move forward.
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