He asked me to do what? Why? (marriage, men, husband)
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If your boyfriend is still mulling why his ex divorced him, it's time for you to start mulling whether you should get a new boyfriend. Dragging you into it is just bizarre.
Ask HIM your questions since he is the only one who can give you the reasons he wants the questions asked.
Personally I would drop him so quickly just for asking you to do this.
It is silly and he was married to this woman he should know why he got divorced.
I did ask him, and his reasons were the ones stated above. He, for some reason, thinks I want to get a good look at her. (She is the definitively more attractive of the two of us by the way.) And he says that she will be taken off guard and that women more likely tell the truth when confronted with other women.
He got his answer from her, but he isn't happy with it, and he says he needs me to somehow coax the real answer out of her. Yes, he talks about her often, and divorce as a concept even more so. When I mention he is not over her, he says it will probably take years to heal from the wound, but how long does it really take if you have any care for who you are with presently? That is what I don't understand.
I thought at first, when he said he was going to recruit me for a "spectacle" because I didn't work that evening that maybe we were going to see a show or the orchestra. How stupid did I feel?
I did ask him, and his reasons were the ones stated above. He, for some reason, thinks I want to get a good look at her. (She is the definitively more attractive of the two of us by the way.) And he says that she will be taken off guard and that women more likely tell the truth when confronted with other women.
He got his answer from her, but he isn't happy with it, and he says he needs me to somehow coax the real answer out of her. Yes, he talks about her often, and divorce as a concept even more so. When I mention he is not over her, he says it will probably take years to heal from the wound, but how long does it really take if you have any care for who you are with presently? That is what I don't understand.
I thought at first, when he said he was going to recruit me for a "spectacle" because I didn't work that evening that maybe we were going to see a show or the orchestra. How stupid did I feel?
It sounds like he has been using you for the entire time you have been together. He also sounds codependent. If it was me I would get out immediately. You will never be number one in his eyes.
I did ask him, and his reasons were the ones stated above. He, for some reason, thinks I want to get a good look at her. (She is the definitively more attractive of the two of us by the way.) And he says that she will be taken off guard and that women more likely tell the truth when confronted with other women.
He got his answer from her, but he isn't happy with it, and he says he needs me to somehow coax the real answer out of her. Yes, he talks about her often, and divorce as a concept even more so. When I mention he is not over her, he says it will probably take years to heal from the wound, but how long does it really take if you have any care for who you are with presently? That is what I don't understand.
I thought at first, when he said he was going to recruit me for a "spectacle" because I didn't work that evening that maybe we were going to see a show or the orchestra. How stupid did I feel?
If he isn't over her and past his divorce by now you are wasting your time staying with this guy.
I do hope you move on immediately and find a real man who loves you and does not want to use you to get back at his ex wife. You or anyone else does not deserve to be used and treated like this.
You have no business being dragged into his personal drama in regards to something that happened before you were in his life.
It is his divorce, his ex wife, his drama and his issue, let him deal with them alone.
You do not need to be a "spectacle" you need to be a woman who is happy by herself or happy with a man who loves and appreciates her who does not want to use her or involve her in his unresolved issue.
Also, I am quite sure that you and the ex wife are equal in attractiveness in your own ways.
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