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Unfortunately, much of the advice here perpeptuates the 'Woman is a victim' attitude. I was raised that an adult woman is an equal and by saying she is someone to taken advantage of would imply she is less than that; I don't feed into it.
Whatever you end up doing take responsibilty for your own actions. Your an adult, I wouldn't judge you one way or another on your choice: Have your first experience with this guy "Good for you!". Save yourself for your One and only "Good for you!". Have drunken sex in a car for your first experience, sounds awkward to me but "Good for you!"
People will treat you the way you allow them to. In this scenario you are basically saying you are worth no more than a warm hole for a married guy who's a long way from his wife to stick it in. If he liked you, he could get a divorce and be your boyfriend. He doesn't like you. He just wants to use you for sex. Don't lower yourself to this. You will wind up with feelings for him, and feel very used when he is still in love with and married to his wife 6 months later.
P.S.-Women getting into bed with men unless they are planning on sex is a really dumb idea. It sends a confusing message. Do not get in bed with someone unless you are ready for sex.
I hear you, thanks for your input.
I don't see how it can be confusing to sleep in a same bed than a man if i'm sleeping in unflattering clothes, make up free, and that I'm basically on the other side of the bed
Well, if it's something you really want (to experience sex) then I guess someone you know, and are attracted to could help you with that...as long as you realize and accept that there can't/won't be any strings attached..there's nothing wrong with wanting to experience sex
It could be more rewarding for you though, if you waited, and found someone who cares about your brain as much as your body..and wants to love ALL of you....but that's really your choice..just be careful, and above all else love and respect yourself.
The thing is, now I'm ok with the no strings attached idea, but if I have sex with him, I don't know if my agreement to no strings attached will still work for me, that's the big reason why I have been hesitating. I'm having a hard time believing someone could possibly love me for me some day, that's just weird, and I don't want to end up 40 and still a virgin (no offense to anyone).
Unfortunately, much of the advice here perpeptuates the 'Woman is a victim' attitude. I was raised that an adult woman is an equal and by saying she is someone to taken advantage of would imply she is less than that; I don't feed into it.
Whatever you end up doing take responsibilty for your own actions. Your an adult, I wouldn't judge you one way or another on your choice: Have your first experience with this guy "Good for you!". Save yourself for your One and only "Good for you!". Have drunken sex in a car for your first experience, sounds awkward to me but "Good for you!"
The car theme seem to be fairly common and I have heard of much worse from former gfs . My suggestion which only applies to me would be take the matter into your own hands. If you decide this is the one, control when, how and where it happens. I have only been with two Vs in my life and I was very slow and patient both times. It's about the best you can do unless she's been taking care of business with something else in the past.
Unfortunately, much of the advice here perpeptuates the 'Woman is a victim' attitude. I was raised that an adult woman is an equal and by saying she is someone to taken advantage of would imply she is less than that; I don't feed into it.
Whatever you end up doing take responsibilty for your own actions. Your an adult, I wouldn't judge you one way or another on your choice: Have your first experience with this guy "Good for you!". Save yourself for your One and only "Good for you!". Have drunken sex in a car for your first experience, sounds awkward to me but "Good for you!"
This is a good point. Would the advice be the same if the OP was a 24 year old male virgin? I'm sure a lot more people would say go for it because we automatically assume men can easily separate emotion from sex so the experience won't leave any emotional scars. The OP just has to realize that regardless how she feels after sex, there is no future with this man because of his situation. If you are okay with that, go for it.
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. My suggestion which only applies to me would be take the matter into your own hands. If you decide this is the one, control when, how and where it happens. I have only been with two Vs in my life and I was very slow and patient both times. It's about the best you can do unless she's been taking care of business with something else in the past.
