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So I had a date at my place tonight with a girl I've known for years. We talked, ate/drunk, laughed, listened to music, played PS3. Nothing romantic happened (it has in the past though), other than I gave her a kiss goodnight.
I imagine if I were to enter a monogamist, live in and more serious relationship with this girl. Things would change. And our ability to connect and have a really good time. Would get less and less. Not saying that would happen for sure, but its a reasonably likely scenario.
Which got me thinking, how many of you in LTR's can hang out with your SO's and for the most part get on like best friends nearly all the time? and if you have such a relationship, what are the keys for you keeping it this way?
I have been living with my SO for almost 9 years. We are still best friends who hang out together. We do everything together except play computer games. I don't like Left for Dead and he's not keen on WoW do he's on his computer mowing down zombies and I'm on mine killing other players in battlegrounds.
I can't honestly think of any "keys" to keep it like this. It is a PREFERENCE. I want to be around him more than anyone else I can think of.
We have fun, yes. But it's other stuff, too. When I hear news, I want to share it with him. Oftentimes when I am doing something without him, I think, "Hubs would love this!" or "He would HATE this."
Seeing him as a dad has made me love and respect him even more.
It's just my brain's default setting, I guess. And that's how I knew I loved him. He became my first thought in most everything, and I didn't want to NOT be with him.
So I had a date at my place tonight with a girl I've known for years. We talked, ate/drunk, laughed, listened to music, played PS3. Nothing romantic happened (it has in the past though), other than I gave her a kiss goodnight.
I imagine if I were to enter a monogamist, live in and more serious relationship with this girl. Things would change. And our ability to connect and have a really good time. Would get less and less. Not saying that would happen for sure, but its a reasonably likely scenario.
Which got me thinking, how many of you in LTR's can hang out with your SO's and for the most part get on like best friends nearly all the time? and if you have such a relationship, what are the keys for you keeping it this way?
Gosh I can't imagine NOT feeling this way with the guy I loved. I don't think I ever have fallen in love with someone that I didn't feel that way about. Just seems normal to me.
We have known each other 15 years, been "we" 10 years, married 7 years and we still do the things we did 15 years ago as friends.
It will change if you expect it to change (self fulfilling prophecy) then don't do anything to ensure things don't change too much.
Obviously there will be change as both get older and hopefully wiser but change is indifferent if you accept and adapt to those changes.
So I had a date at my place tonight with a girl I've known for years. We talked, ate/drunk, laughed, listened to music, played PS3. Nothing romantic happened (it has in the past though), other than I gave her a kiss goodnight.
I imagine if I were to enter a monogamist, live in and more serious relationship with this girl. Things would change. And our ability to connect and have a really good time. Would get less and less. Not saying that would happen for sure, but its a reasonably likely scenario.
Which got me thinking, how many of you in LTR's can hang out with your SO's and for the most part get on like best friends nearly all the time? and if you have such a relationship, what are the keys for you keeping it this way?
My wife is my best friend. That goes hand in hand with her being my lover and wife. They are not at all mutually exclusive things in our relationship.
We both mutually enjoy most of each other's interests and hobbies and do a ton of things together spanning a wide range of stuff.
The key to keeping it this way is for us to keep being best friends and doing fun things together. Not take our relationship for granted because we are "married" or fail to take the time to plan and do fun.
My wife and I are coming up on 8 years of marriage this month. We love being with each other and enjoying each other's company. We don't have to be doing anything special, either. Just being around each other is usually good enough. We have three little people that always seem to follow us around but we do try to give them the slip once in a while and make time for us exclusively.
And like friends sometimes do, we can tease and make fun of each other without hurting each others feelings. It's just a fun dynamic. Of course not every day is like hanging out with a friend. Any couple is going to have their moments. But we never go to bed mad at each other and every day has a clean slate.
So I had a date at my place tonight with a girl I've known for years. We talked, ate/drunk, laughed, listened to music, played PS3. Nothing romantic happened (it has in the past though), other than I gave her a kiss goodnight.
I imagine if I were to enter a monogamist, live in and more serious relationship with this girl. Things would change. And our ability to connect and have a really good time. Would get less and less. Not saying that would happen for sure, but its a reasonably likely scenario.
Which got me thinking, how many of you in LTR's can hang out with your SO's and for the most part get on like best friends nearly all the time? and if you have such a relationship, what are the keys for you keeping it this way?
This doesn't answer your question, but I'm curious about the bolded part. Why do you imagine that it's likely things would go downhill?
Which got me thinking, how many of you in LTR's can hang out with your SO's and for the most part get on like best friends nearly all the time? and if you have such a relationship, what are the keys for you keeping it this way?
I still do. I think our key is to listen to each other. Too many couples only think about themselves and don't consider the feelings of their partner. We always try to communicate with each other and understand each other view, hence we hardly ever disagree.
We also share the same values, which I believe is very important. And we like to play around and do things together.
Things only go downhill if you are a selfish person.
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I don't think I ever have fallen in love with someone that I didn't feel that way about. Just seems normal to me.
