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I haven't had many horrible dates, but there is one that has stood out throughout the years of my life. This date occured about 21/22 years ago. I was at my best friends house for the weekend. The guy she was talking to at the time had called and wanted to hang out. She told him it was not a good time because she had me over. Well he was quick to say that he had a cousin of his visiting from Cuba and could ask him to come along so that I could go along as well. Sort of a blind date situation. *** Mistake #1
We agreed and so we planned to go out. I think we did a movie and some McDonalds or something like that. There was no chemistry, no nothing going on between me and the guy. To begin with, I didn't think he was cute at all. To make matter's worse, even though I am Cuban, I never really was into entire conversations in Spanish and this guy did not speak a lick of English. Anyway, as foolish teenagers we mixed beer into the mix towards the end of the night when my best friends guy wanted to hang out at the beach for a little bit.
When we get to the beach my best friend and her guy kinda went off a bit for some privacy and left me and this other guy alone. He begins to try to hold my hand and get close to me and I was trying to, politely and not hurt his feelings with outright rejection, maintain distance between us. My best friend was not that far away and I caught her looking towards us at one point. I tried to motion to her about getting out of there, but probably cause of the beer or the moment who knows, she thought I was just smiling and waving hi and so didn't respond to the situation.
This guy continued with his trying to get close and put his arm around me and I finally had to flat out tell him to keep his hands to himself. After a few seconds of just looking out at the water, he asks me "whats the matter don't you believe in love at first sight". OMG... I remember I about lost it at that moment. Mind you I was 17 and I just looked at him and said "buddy, you need to get yourself a new book of lines cause that one is so old it has mold growing on it". Okay, I probably could have been nicer but he was on my nerves already.
After that, I really was not caring about spoiling the night for my best friend. I marched over to her and asked her if we could please go as I had enough of this guy. She could see that I was really upset and told her guy we were leaving. On the way to be dropped off at her house she was asking her guy what her cousin did to **** me off like that. He had no clue what it could be.
Anyway, once at her house I told her what took place and she called her guy and chewed him out for his cousins behavior. That night we kind of laughed about it afterwards and it became known to us as "the date with vince, a face like a moose and hands way too loose". To this day, nearly 21/22 years later, my best friend and I can still recall that "date" and what we described it as. It still brings us tons of laughter.
Needless to say, it was my first, last, and only blind date in my life. She promised to never try to set me up on a blind date, and I vowed never to go on one again.
I had the toe licker date. Yep, you heard correctly TOE LICKER.
I had been conversing with this guy for about 2 weeks, over the phone and via email. He was established (VP of company), well educated, well spoken, funny and good looking. Seemed to have everything going on without having that "too good to be true syndrome) so I agreed to a date.
I met him a local place closer to his house. While having drinks and waiting for our table, I couldn't help but notice that he was staring at my feet, now I do keep them manicured well and I thought ok, maybe he's admiring them LOL
Next thing you know, he leans in close and wants to 'ask me a question', then I hear this (and no, I'm not kidding), "I have been admiring your feet all night and want to know if you would let me suck your toes and lick them?"
As you can imagine, I sat there and without missing a beat, I grabbed my purse, told him I was leaving and that if he followed me out, he'd find a surprise waiting for him and not a good one.
He sent several emails after that and asked for me to forgive him and wanted to see me again but I told him that while in hindsite, it was hilarious that it was a little much for the first date so NO to any future dates. Thanks but no LOL
worst date ever?? hmmm.....Homecoming, junior year HS........hottest guy in school.....worst breath in school....ewwwwwww it was so bad I litterally said goodnight, i'll call you, and tried to run inside as fast as i could so he wouldn't try to kiss me.....it was bad.......i offered him gum casually but he was like "oh, no thanx, has sugar in it" and I was like GREAT! Yea, pretty bad date, for me anyway.
I did the whole online dating thing for a while and met a few wackO's... One guy... his name was SKIER something or other... he went on and on about his racing, that I didn't like to ski, his cool new pair of skis he had to pick up... so, he sounded really athletic and the pic he sent was from the waist up- ski poles in hand... So, we decided to meet for coffee finally one day he went to pick up his new skiis.... I got there first and got a window seat...saw him pull in... and then say him get out... on crutches and walk into the coffee shop... HE HAD ONE LEG! Not joking... as said so perfectly in Seinfeld "Not that there's anything wrong with that" BUT he forgot to leave that little bit of information OUT of all of our conversations... I ignored the lack of a leg, sucked down my coffee and high tailed it out of there...
In my work as a massage therapist, I've encountered many who are ticklish when it comes to feet - an obsession. Others relax and moan when you work their trigger points.
I have a couple one-date-too-many as well ... one of which I met a gal online she seemed cute, show up at her door WOW she was about 200 pounds heavier than the pic, not only that when we went to dinner she didn't want to eat anything. Another of which is a really cute gal from college who started crying on our date when I mentioned her ex, never asked her out again. Last but not last, is well on a wonderful first date with a another super cute gal, everything going great, we go back to the parking lot and her car was "hit and run" by some jerk, I guess she was superstitious as we chatted a few times but never dated again.
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but he was like "oh, no thanx, has sugar in it" and I was like GREAT! Yea, pretty bad date, for me anyway.
Oh, I have one right out of a comedy!
