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Well this thread took veered well off into another direction.
I thought it was talking about this 3 dates no sex and now it's talking about average and above average.
And I don't understand what the big deal is. Most people are average. That is the definition of average. And yet average people including average men have been able to meet and marry average women and have average kids.
If everyone decided to be above-average then that would be the new average.
As far as the three dates and no sex, she could be waiting to see if you're that jerk of a guy who is trying to sleep with her and never talk to her again. You gotta keep in mind that maybe once she opens that door, it will never close
Well, the "three-date" rule is nonsense anyway. A creation of Hollywood.
It is what it is. If you've known someone for 11 years but never dated them, then suddenly you do, sex on the first "date" is not in any way an unusual thing.
It really is based on what the two people involved do, not what anyone else says.
I understand completely, (SuperDave72). No matter what, it's a crap shoot. It's up to each person to be honest with themselves. And “average” too is an individualized perspective on the person's frame of reference. What are their variables they're working with? Experience, friends, movies, porn?
Agreeing with (lovesMountains) we can be our worst enemy in many a situation. The likelihood that I will be my future partners first is unlikely. But I'll be damned if I'm going to think about, worry, or care about any of her previous experiences. First, is she disease free and clean, everywhere! I will focus on her, pleasing her first, second, third, and eventually me (just the way I am) and pray that this time, I made the right decision and all will fall into place. There are no guarantees that even if I encounter my compatible mate will the status quo always be. It's life, s#*t happens. All I can control is myself, my attitude, my actions, my reactions, my thoughts, my feelings...me. And be honest with myself. I believe with anything, you get out of it what you put into it. Yes, sometimes the dice fail, yet, I can't waste energy and time trying to stand out more than the previous guy or another guy and could really give two craps about them. I am secure with myself that I'm willing, patient, and if I really desire someone, just as with the efforts many a human puts into the “courting”, that mindset does not fade with time with me. Imagination is limitless. That's why I hate Valentines Day. Insulting! “OK, all you lameos out there, in case you forgot to think of your special someone for the whole year, here's your opportunity to do something special to make up for not doing something special any other time” I don't need reminders, marketers, or society's methods of how I should, could, can't be with the one I hold dear. My frame of reference is vast, have had them from 26 to 54, all being unique, no two alike and no guarantees that the wild ones would remain wild, remain faithful, etc. And it did not matter that it was LTR or momentary lapse of reason. It didn't make a difference if they put out first date, or refrained till much later. You work at it, truly work, do your best and pray that your partner will do likewise. Nothing is guaranteed other than death and taxes.
I can't read through 43 pages of this, but in case no one mentioned it:
It's Mardi Gras. Meeting someone during MG counts as having been on 12 dates. You should have been able to (how to put this delicately) get to the 5th base the same night. Or was there an alcohol shortage in New Orleans during the holiday?
There's also the best case scenario - she thought you were the best thing since sliced bread and wanted to keep you past St. Joseph's Day
I can't read through 43 pages of this, but in case no one mentioned it:
It's Mardi Gras. Meeting someone during MG counts as having been on 12 dates. You should have been able to (how to put this delicately) get to the 5th base the same night. Or was there an alcohol shortage in New Orleans during the holiday?
There's also the best case scenario - she thought you were the best thing since sliced bread and wanted to keep you past St. Joseph's Day
She said she had a headache and took a St. Joseph's aspirin.
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