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That is one reason why I adopted this stance - to keep myself from attracting just anyone. But it's like I can't turn it off.
As for sucky dates, it's not so much that the dates themselves have been sucky, it's that there has been no real connection or spark with the guys I've been out with. I feel...shut down. Like my heart is closed or something.
Its all perspective.
You date a lot, but are not satisfied with your dates.
Maybe your dates are not the ones who are the issue. Maybe you are looking for something that doesn't exist, or something that isn't realistic.
You have to be happpy and enjoy life from within, and not look for someone else to bring that to your life.
So interesting how there are some people who can date with no problem and are miserable.
Then there are people who can not date and are miserable.
Most of the time, both people would claim they have it worse.
Become more relaxed, open body language, smile..... all those good things. Also, being friendly with everyone makes you more approachable. Joking with the cashier, saying hi to people in the store.... if you look like you are having a good time people want to join in.
You date a lot, but are not satisfied with your dates.
Maybe your dates are not the ones who are the issue. Maybe you are looking for something that doesn't exist, or something that isn't realistic.
You have to be happpy and enjoy life from within, and not look for someone else to bring that to your life.
So interesting how there are some people who can date with no problem and are miserable.
Then there are people who can not date and are miserable.
Most of the time, both people would claim they have it worse.
I agree that you have to be happy and enjoy life from within first. I think that I probably have some unresolved "stuff" that has been blocking my ability to manifest what I will truly ENJOY in my life. When your energy is off, you still attract things and people, but those things and people aren't right for you.
OP, it sounds like the men you're around are some real p***sies.
Most men i know of don't care and think it's more of a challenge to break through a woman the meaner she acts. They see through to her and get her to open up. Then Boom. Accomplishment.
Like some of the others have suggested, maybe try smiling more. I don't mean go around with a goofy grin on your face like the joker but practice friendly conversation with everyone. Even those you're not physically attracted to. If you stand with your arms folded, stop immediately.
I would say I don't smile more than I smile. But it's not like I'm never smiling.
I just got back in from my corner bar and the 4 single women there gave off the ehh Im into my cell phone vibe than anyone around me vibe. No smiling or anything that would get a man to give them a second look. They were not approached by anyone including me. A smile, a flirtatious look or wink would have gone a long way in that environment. Maybe a simple smile directed at an attractive man would open the door to someone who is interested.
I just got back in from my corner bar and the 4 single women there gave off the ehh Im into my cell phone vibe than anyone around me vibe. No smiling or anything that would get a man to give them a second look. They were not approached by anyone including me. A smile, a flirtatious look or wink would have gone a long way in that environment. Maybe a simple smile directed at an attractive man would open the door to someone who is interested.
This was the vibe I started getting when I was looking around in local bars too. I knew a couple of the women and knew they were single. They were just buried in their cell phones. I just chalked it up as the person(s) they were texting was more interesting/important than the people around them. Some areas just aren't as easy as other areas to get dates and/or meet people. You can smile and be nice all day, but it's still a crap shoot if it's going to be reciprocated or not. I shoot for being nice for myself and the people around me. You have to earn my trust in order for me to want to help you and expect nothing in return.
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