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Absolutely! For me, sex is very important. I don't care what my husband (if I had one) looks like, I'd always be sexually attracted to him. Many times a week too. I might be shallow, but I couldn't marry someone that didn't believe sex was an important part of marriage. A wife/husband needs to be satisfied financially, emotionally, and sexually, just my thoughts.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,962,945 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bucktownbabe
I won't speak for Ruth, but personally if spending some time outside my own circle means hanging out with people who don't like to have sex, I think I'll have to pass.
I find your perspective to be truly bizarre, OP. Who are these people who don't like having sex? I mean, I know they exist, but they certainly aren't even close to being the majority. Most humans enjoy sex quite a bit.
Cosigned. I really am glad my filter keeps these people out of my life.
Quote:
Originally Posted by srjth
When they are young, I believe women's libido is lower than males. When they get older (say 35+) I believe the roles reverse and women's libido surpasses males. It's stupid really.
with my girlfriends, I really don't talk about men's libedos or make fun of them. Actually, we hardly ever talk about sex. I think that's a myth perpetuated by TV and entertainment. Actually, I think the jokes about men are a myth also perpetucated by TV and entertainment as well.
Agreed 100%. Go figure that so many men believe all that nonsense.
Women talk less about it, that's all. When we do talk about men being sexy, we often disagree because our tastes vary more from individual to individual. Men all seem to like big boobs and big lips, etc. Except for the select few hot guys who might be universally attractive, most guys won't appeal to all women, but they'll appeal a LOT to certain women. This is why it's boring for women to even talk about hot guys - we can't agree on it. We end up insulting eachother's tastes.
TRUTH. Man can we make that a sticky somewhere? SO many guys on this forum just don't get that.
Quote:
Originally Posted by orangeapple
Here's the thing.... Women are visual, but perhaps less so than men when it comes to sexual attraction. A man can be sexy by the way he makes a woman FEEL, emotionally and physically. If a woman loses interest in her partner, it's often far less to do with his looks than him no longer being a good lover (or perhaps he never was and infatuation just made up for it). Being a good lover goes beyond physical stuff - it includes the emotional connection. This doesn't mean listening to her feelings (but that's nice), but arousing her emotionally. Men often stop wooing and seducing women once they've "got" her.
A man needs to BE desirable for a woman to desire him, and that often has less to do with looks. So basically, women just have different turn-ons. The brain is called the biggest sex organ for a reason.
Phrases like "wham bam thank you ma'am" and "pounding away" exist for a reason. Lots of men fail at sensuality and nuance of touch.
Those who don't fail at that and aren't desired anymore likely still "suck" out of bed. They are not good lovers in the broader sense.
I said this in another thread and it got a LOT if reps from female posters:
A lot of men don't want to consider they are bad lovers and prefer to believe women just don't like sex. They dont want to face the idea that women don't like sex with THEM. Those same women may like sex just fine with another man. And as I noted, it likely has far less to do with looks than other factors.
Meh I find that hetero gals generally desire certain guys. It's understandable to me that the gals who rant and rave about hot guys wouldn't have sex with their husbands as it seems for gals sex is also emotionally tied and according to studies most married gals are unhappy with their marriage as in not emotionally attracted or attached to their partner (understandably why to me most divorces are initiated by gals)
Studies show that gals generally get less than half as many orgasms as their partner and that generally guys in every age range get more oral than they give. So I buy that all of these just suck in bed at least to my pleasure orgasm standard and totally understand gals finding the subject of sex fascinating just not participating in it. Why participate in my opinion when it's likely going to suck with the orgasm gap, guys seem selfishness, the 'her orgasm is her responsibility' mindset, and the risks it comes with rape, pregnancy, STDs, and STIs .
Someone once said:
Women have to be reasonably satisfied with the relationship in order to want sex.
Men have to be getting sex in order to be reasonably satisfied with the relationship.
Not true universally, but for a lot of couples, there's a lot of truth to this.
For example, I would never purposely, consciously, withhold sex because my partner didn't do his part around the house, but the fact that he doesn't do his part around the house might keep me annoyed enough so that sex is the farthest thing from my mind. If he's done something inconsiderate, and I'm hurt or angry, it could make sex the farthest thing from my mind. The issue would have to be resolved before I'd be able to enjoy sex. But if I do something that's hurtful or inconsiderate toward him, he would still want sex as soon as I'd mention it. Then his hurt or anger would be gone, just because he got sex.
Another truth. Sex is NOT the same thing to women, as it is to men, and I go further and say that this is true for MOST couples. Once a man learns this, he will be far more successful with relationships.
Realize this, you are not giving a gift to men by having sex with them. Get off the high horse, lol.
Bit curious as to how did you think it was applicable for her to realize she is giving a gift to guys by having sex with them from her basically saying the idea of sex is better than the reality.
Meh I find that hetero gals generally desire certain guys. It's understandable to me that the gals who rant and rave about hot guys wouldn't have sex with their husbands as it seems for gals sex is also emotionally tied and according to studies most married gals are unhappy with their marriage as in not emotionally attracted or attached to their partner (understandably why to me most divorces are initiated by gals)
Studies show that gals generally get less than half as many orgasms as their partner and that generally guys in every age range get more oral than they give. So I buy that all of these just suck in bed at least to my pleasure orgasm standard and totally understand gals finding the subject of sex fascinating just not participating in it. Why participate in my opinion when it's likely going to suck with the orgasm gap, guys seem selfishness, the 'her orgasm is her responsibility' mindset, and the risks it comes with rape, pregnancy, STDs, and STIs .
OMG, sounds like an epic guy fail, what's up with that?
Another truth. Sex is NOT the same thing to women, as it is to men, and I go further and say that this is true for MOST couples. Once a man learns this, he will be far more successful with relationships.
Don't you have to, um, actually have a relationship before this is even an issue? So the proper understanding has no bearing on success for those seeking but not in a relationship.
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