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Old 04-10-2014, 07:58 PM
 
6,732 posts, read 9,976,371 times
Reputation: 6848

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Does 'high' mean multiple times a week? Or multiple times a day? Does it mean you want it, or you need it? Can it be satisfied by masturbation, or is partner sex a requirement?

Hos similar does your partner's drive have to be to yours, to be compatible? Your drive will probably change radically during your lifetime, and so will your partner's. How do you plan to deal with that?

Do you prefer a partner with a higher or lower drive than your own? If so, why?
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Old 04-10-2014, 10:23 PM
 
Location: State of Transition
102,126 posts, read 107,381,087 times
Reputation: 115947
hahaha! So funny--everyone's avoiding this thread.

Once I'm with a partner, I'm compelled to make maximum use of that partner. So no, masturbation doesn't cut it. The whole point of being with a partner is....to not need masturbation.
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Old 04-10-2014, 10:25 PM
 
Location: Pa
42,763 posts, read 52,769,580 times
Reputation: 25362
I'm going to have fun with him.:P
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Old 04-10-2014, 10:28 PM
 
Location: Middle America
37,409 posts, read 53,418,348 times
Reputation: 53067
Drives needs to be similar enough that nobody feels consistently like they're going without, and nobody feels like they're mostly going through the motions so the other person doesn't feel neglected.
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Old 04-10-2014, 11:37 PM
 
Location: Copenhagen, Denmark
10,931 posts, read 11,692,733 times
Reputation: 13170
I've been through a near-lifetime of sex partners. I'd say my sex drive is above average. For me it has meant that i am easily aroused and am generally able to act on it quickly. That has not changed much in the 55 years since i have been sexually active. However, my enjoyment of sex - with a partner - never reached it's full potential until i met my match about 18 years ago. So, throw away the earlier years. I was just tuning up!

As far as compatibility is concerned: i made trade-offs and, during my first marriage, my sexuality suffered in return for the rewards I got from my family life, career, and love of money and private property. A divorce took care of the last two items, so my sexuality was back on the table as my first priority. I was extremely fortunate to find a woman who is also very sexual and also very sweet...and most of all who loves me like no other man she ever had sex with before i came along.

I didn't - and i think most young men don't - know very much both about their sexuality and the reality of sexual incompatibility. A vagina is a vagina and sex is a scarce commodity in the US. So, we often make trade-offs in our partners based on lack of information and Victorian morality (sex isn't meant to be that important), the long-term consequences of which can be quite painful. Undoing the choice of a partner can also be quite painful. So, in my case, I weighed the expected benefits of finding a more sexually compatible partner, less the emotional the emotional and financial costs of divorce, against the net benefits of my existing situation. The calculation was easy, but acting on it took me 10 years.

In the end, my first marital experience taught me what I wanted and finding a woman who was sexually compatible with me turned out not to be hard. What i didn't know, and what i didn't find out until after i met my second wife, was how to turn my sex drive into the enjoyment of sex, emotionally and physically.

That's my happy ending!

How often do we have sex? I only remember Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday. I'm old and I was too exhausted after I got back from a business trip to another African sh-t hole on Monday night.
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