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My wife and I haver been married for 36 years. We have three sons aged 35, 34 and 31 and three grandchildren. We've had our ups and downs like everybody and I admit I haven't been faithful the entire time. I've always had a hard time resisting an attractive woman and gave in to temptation many times.
It was a very different story 4 years ago when a woman I was seeing got pregnant and didn't want to have an abortion. The baby boy was born and the paternity test confirmed he's mine. I told her I would help them financially and would visit the child once in a while but he had to be kept a secret.
And so it has worked out like that until now. However, I can't live like this anymore, he's growing up and I can't take the burden in my consciente any longer.
The problem is she'll never forgive me this one and so many years will go down the drain. I'm sure she'll want the divorce and I don't know how my sons will react as well.
Is there anything I could tell her to make her understand why I did this?
My wife and I haver been married for 36 years. We have three sons aged 35, 34 and 31 and three grandchildren. We've had our ups and downs like everybody and I admit I haven't been faithful the entire time. I've always had a hard time resisting an attractive woman and gave in to temptation many times.
Jesus H Thomas. This is an instance where the op needs to be cleaned out of every dime he has left to be alone and penny less for the rest of his natural born life.
My wife and I haver been married for 36 years. We have three sons aged 35, 34 and 31 and three grandchildren. We've had our ups and downs like everybody and I admit I haven't been faithful the entire time. I've always had a hard time resisting an attractive woman and gave in to temptation many times.
It was a very different story 4 years ago when a woman I was seeing got pregnant and didn't want to have an abortion. The baby boy was born and the paternity test confirmed he's mine. I told her I would help them financially and would visit the child once in a while but he had to be kept a secret.
And so it has worked out like that until now. However, I can't live like this anymore, he's growing up and I can't take the burden in my consciente any longer.
The problem is she'll never forgive me this one and so many years will go down the drain. I'm sure she'll want the divorce and I don't know how my sons will react as well.
Is there anything I could tell her to make her understand why I did this?
P.S. How do you change the title? I obviously didn't want to add that smilie.
How can you keep a secret like that, knowing that you had another kid for four years now? It is just now getting to you. Dude, you need a new conscience. I also don't think that you respect your wife, otherwise you would not have cheated. You don't deserve your wife.
Well, there are those who think you should suffer in silence. Obviously, if you feel you have to tell her, it's because the personal consequences of not telling her are worse than the consequences of telling her.
Is there anything I could tell her to make her understand why I did this?
Well....WHY did you do it? That would be a start.
I have no idea how she will react because I don't know her, but I can't imagine she'll take it gently.
The thing that sucks the most is this little boy does not have the privilege of having a father growing up like your other sons did. I imagine your grown sons are going to be extremely disappointed in you, however you look far worse for the way you have treated this other child in my opinion.
Own up to what you did and be a father to this poor child instead of shunning him. If you were my father I'd disown you just for treating this other child as if he were a disease
Edit: Come to think of it, if my husband had some "love child" and chose not to be part of that child's life, well there'd be no chance in hell of us reconciling (if I had even considered it in the first place). Knowing how much time and energy he puts into our children...to deny that to another child simply because he put his dick where it didn't belong...wow...that is cruel and heartless.
Last edited by *Sixy*; 04-13-2014 at 08:59 AM..
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