What is the incentive for young men to want relationship these days? (wife, women)
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The same incentive there is for women. Men are human, despite the few noisy guys here who will try to tell you otherwise.
Some humans prefer casual sex always, most prefer deeper connection most of the time.
This. It sounds like the OP is selling young dudes short and putting them all in the same pigeon hole. That's unfair--we're not all shallow hedonists. College and the 20's arent' one big frat party. Some of the dudes I hung out with in college were already married by their mid-20's, others in LTR's, or looking for that. On some forums I've seen guys complaining about all the party girls on campus, and how dudes looking for something serious were SOL. (Also a mistaken perception.)
I think the problem is that people looking for serious relationships, men and women both, have trouble sifting through the dreck to find each other.
To answer the OP;s question, the incentive is a true meeting of hearts and minds. Priceless.
For some young guys, there doesn't need to be an "incentive" to want a relationship. Humans need to bond. That's all.
The hookup culture represents a minority of young people. Don't be fooled by all the media coverage of it. The media are into sensationalism. It sells.
Sounds like codepency. I'll never base my happiness on another person.
Sounds like codepency. I'll never base my happiness on another person.
A relationship is not about codependance, and is never based on derriving your happiness from your partner. You have to be happy first, to have a good relationship.
Sounds like codepency. I'll never base my happiness on another person.
Do yourself a favor, step away from the keyboard, and go live life........... Marriage and relationship doesn't automatically mean "codependency"......
Sounds like codepency. I'll never base my happiness on another person.
You've gotta be kidding, right? Bonding is a normal, healthy human thing. All primates bond. If you can't bond, you're in trouble. That doesn't equate to looking for someone else to make you happy. You sound like you have a fear of intimacy.
Hmmm thank you for the input. For the record this is not from blogs that I've gathered this opinion. I have a few very attractive male friends, and this is in fact how things work for them. They have girls that chase them, proposition sex, send naked pics to them etc. Run errands for them, run at their beck and call, etc. And it happens frequently. And the women are often very attractive. I wonder why men in these situations would find a relationship appealing.
On the other hand i do know plenty of guys that want commitment. I admit I just often wonder why... Or at least for men under 30. I guess Ive always thought men were wired differently. Not necessarily that they are just wired by sex, but that they prefer to not get so serious or vested into one women so quickly/easily especially if they don't necessarily have to. Or that it would make little sense to, when you have plenty of options.
Hmmm thank you for the input. For the record this is not from blogs that I've gathered this opinion. I have a few very attractive male friends, and this is in fact how things work for them. They have girls that chase them, proposition sex, send naked pics to them etc. And it happens frequently. And the women are often very attractive.
On the other hand i do know plenty of guys that want commitment. I often just wonder why... I guess Ive always thought men were wired differently. Not necessarily that they are just wired by sex, but that they prefer to not get so serious or vested into one women so quickly/easily especially if they don't necessarily have to. Or that it would make little sense to, when you have plenty of options.
Men when they get a bit older are more prone to being in relationships, I mean, how much booty can you get before you realize that it's all the same at the end of the day, don't get me wrong, but maybe it's because I've gotten much more spiritual the last few yrs, I think bonds with people are important.
I've done the casual sex thing and while it's fun, it gets old..........
Hmmm thank you for the input. For the record this is not from blogs that I've gathered this opinion. I have a few very attractive male friends, and this is in fact how things work for them. They have girls that chase them, proposition sex, send naked pics to them etc. And it happens frequently. And the women are often very attractive.
On the other hand i do know plenty of guys that want commitment. I often just wonder why... I guess Ive always thought men were wired differently. Not necessarily that they are just wired by sex, but that they prefer to not get so serious or vested into one women so quickly/easily especially if they don't necessarily have to. Or that it would make little sense to, when you have plenty of options.
From your first paragraph, I get that all the time. My phone is filled with naked pictures of random girls that I meet and then send me nudes. I don't ever actually continue seeing them. I don't mind one night stands, but I don't pursue them. Maybe if I was younger I'd want to a little more and be out partying, but I'm 26 and hangovers hit me really hard. I much prefer just having a girlfriend I can call any time I want to go out and grab dinner, take a weekend getaway every other weekend and sit in bed on weekdays, eat cake and watch movies.
I have plenty of options, and I still don't pursue them. I have many acquaintences, but I don't like spending too much time with them because I often get bored with people and rarely like getting to know people really well. If I meet a girl that I do like enough for that, I keep her and ignore my other options.
You've gotta be kidding, right? Bonding is a normal, healthy human thing. All primates bond. If you can't bond, you're in trouble. That doesn't equate to looking for someone else to make you happy. You sound like you have a fear of intimacy.
Think what you want. All I know is that I am happier being single than being tied down in a relationship.
For young men, in their prime that constantly find themselves in situations where women throw themselves at them or are sexual early on in the process, what is the incentive to get in a relationship?
Basically none.
The need for a real relationship often hits men later, when they start to care about genuine companionship. And of course, some men never really care about that.
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