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For those wondering ... I never came up with the relationship talk with any of these guys. However, they knew from the get go I was not a hook-up kind of girl. I never talk about the "relationship" aspect first. They're usually the ones who come up with the issue and tell me what I mentioned in my previous post.
I never forced anybody into anything. Chill people. I just asked a general question.
By the way - No point in sending me messages/rep comments to tell me "they don't want to commit to YOU". I got the point.
I don't have an answer for you, because I don't know (not a man after all). And I recently faced the same issue (man got along great with me, liked my company, seemed physically attracted to me... but didn't want to be in a relationship beyond casual dating). Could be a chemistry thing I suppose. But I just don't know.
But your use of the word "commit" has most of the people in this thread talking about marriage, and not just being in a committed relationship (like you are asking). I think they read the thread title and nothing else at times (and I've been guilty of that too in all honestly).
You might have to re-start with another thread because once these things get off track, they never seem to get back on the rails again. Maybe title it, "what makes a man want to be your boyfriend?"
They disagreed with me, but they basically agreed with each other.
Wow, you can never be clear enough for some people...
When it's a yes or no question, i.e. will a man commit to the "right woman," you'll end up with two camps. Given your thread about CD logic, I'd think you'd have better insight into your position. You don't speak for all men nor perhaps even for most men. Or are you insisting you do?
Like I mentioned above, a lot of people won't notice. It's like trying to stop a river of water with a kitchen sponge at this point... too many are off on the marriage tangent. You might be better off starting a new thread and title it something else like "what makes men want to be your boyfriend" since that's what you are really asking.
When it's a yes or no question, i.e. will a man commit to the "right woman," you'll end up with two camps. Given your thread about CD logic, I'd think you'd have better insight into your position. You don't speak for all men nor perhaps even for most men. Or are you insisting you do?
I never said I spoke for all men, and there is no way you could reasonably infer I thought I did from what I have written on this thread. Again, clarity is apparently wasted on some people.
The OP's basic concern was if something about her was making the men in her life reluctant to commit. She got a number of responses that claimed most men would eagerly commit to the right woman. That implies that yes, she may well be the problem.
Given the huge number of men who prefer FWB arrangements to committed relationships, who see marriage as nothing but a trap, who say, "Let's not put a label us us" when pressed by the women they are sleeping with to define their relationships, I find the notion that she is the problem questionable. It is not my perception that most men are dying to get into committed, monogamous, LTR, but just haven't found the right woman yet. Frankly, I think that is a rather naive view.
Stupidity in 99% of the cases.
Social Pressure for the remaining 1%.
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