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Old 05-23-2014, 09:59 AM
 
Location: North Idaho
32,632 posts, read 47,964,911 times
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There should be nothing insecure about not having a social support system. That situation should teach you to take care of yourself. If you can take care of yourself, you become confident. Without the support system, you might be lonely, but if you have any brains at all, you'll join some sort of social system so that you can have human companionship (club, activities, volunteer work)

Having a poor job and low income can be stressful. Personally, I would be out during my free time either looking for a better job or getting myself qualified for a better job. I like the close family support system, but I am not willing to live in grinding poverty for it.
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Old 05-23-2014, 10:09 AM
 
14,376 posts, read 18,360,681 times
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I'd love #1 - it's easily fixable. I make friends all the time. Not saying the ones I have could be replaced, but I'm good at building support networks. I have awesome people in my life, and I am still very close to my two best friends from high school. But on a planet of several billion people, it is really not an impossible task to meet other folks you're compatible with.

I find situation #2 more of a challenge - it's a lot more work. I have a good career, but I kind of got lucky and stumbled into it. I have friends who struggle and who are just as smart as I am. I think a big part of #2 is related to the opportunities that are available, the economic situation and market trends. "Work harder" doesn't always fix that kind of situation, because sometimes it doesn't matter. I was very strategic in how I went about building a career, and I didn't even know I was being strategic. I had no plan, and all I did was make the wisest decision I could at each turning point - but I'm a big person for options, so I just went with the choices that left me the most options as to my future.
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Old 05-23-2014, 10:27 AM
 
Location: Sputnik Planitia
7,829 posts, read 11,780,328 times
Reputation: 9045
Quote:
Originally Posted by oregonwoodsmoke View Post
There should be nothing insecure about not having a social support system. That situation should teach you to take care of yourself.
Yes, but say you break your leg and now can't walk... you may go to a hospital and they take care of you but what happens when you get discharged? How will you manage? I know that sometimes hospitals don't even take you in for a procedure unless you have someone else with you who can take you back home!
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Old 05-23-2014, 10:27 AM
 
8,781 posts, read 9,445,955 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DennyCrane View Post
#1

Having people there to help you is great IF they can help you. But quite often, they can't, at least not in the way you might need.



I strongly disagree. First, hard work and ambition will only get you so far. You might be working two jobs just to get by. You can't work any harder or get yet another job. You want a better paying job than you have now, but you don't have the skills and education required nor do you have the time and money to acquire those skills. This is how a lot of people get trapped in jobs they hate. As for not understanding why having little money would cause insecurity, have you ever been in a situation where you had little money? Most of us want to feel like we have some safety net. If I lost my job today, I have enough saved up where I could continue paying my bills while I looked for another job. If I got sick and racked up huge medical bills, I have enough where I could pay those bills. Friends and family are great, but how many of them will be able to help pay off a $50,000 medical bill or pay your other bills when you lose your job?
First off, Hard work and ambition have to be spent on the proper avenues and not just in dead ends if you expect change.

There is always a way out of hopping from on job to the next if you are actually willing to devote the time to it and LEARN. A social structure gives you built in connections to grow outward from. There is no "finding" the proper connections, the bigger your social circle the larger your base of outward connections grows.

Money is so damn easy to come by it's the connections to make a better living possible that is the difficult part of obtaining.

And yes I have been without money before, I think we all have at some point. I didn't do what so many other do and are taught and go putting myself in to further debt when I was however, I didn't have the money and i sure as hell wasn't going to make the mistake everyone does looking for a line of credit just to make a few things temporarily easier for me.

It's easier than ever to get an education (if that's what you want) and find your own way in the world, you do to have to go the "traditional" route to have a comfortable living.

Nobody said making your own way was easy or without risk, its in fact not as safe or as easy of a route as just finding a job and doing what your told to. it's a learning process that only you are the fall guy of and requires constant adjustment in all respects.

If you are never willing to make opportunities for yourself, what DO you expect from life? What others want of you?

Last edited by rego00123; 05-23-2014 at 10:54 AM..
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Old 05-23-2014, 01:47 PM
 
8,518 posts, read 15,635,354 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rego00123 View Post
First off, Hard work and ambition have to be spent on the proper avenues and not just in dead ends if you expect change.

There is always a way out of hopping from on job to the next if you are actually willing to devote the time to it and LEARN. A social structure gives you built in connections to grow outward from. There is no "finding" the proper connections, the bigger your social circle the larger your base of outward connections grows.

Money is so damn easy to come by it's the connections to make a better living possible that is the difficult part of obtaining.

And yes I have been without money before, I think we all have at some point. I didn't do what so many other do and are taught and go putting myself in to further debt when I was however, I didn't have the money and i sure as hell wasn't going to make the mistake everyone does looking for a line of credit just to make a few things temporarily easier for me.

It's easier than ever to get an education (if that's what you want) and find your own way in the world, you do to have to go the "traditional" route to have a comfortable living.

Nobody said making your own way was easy or without risk, its in fact not as safe or as easy of a route as just finding a job and doing what your told to. it's a learning process that only you are the fall guy of and requires constant adjustment in all respects.

If you are never willing to make opportunities for yourself, what DO you expect from life? What others want of you?
Ah yes, the standard right-wing argument made by the likes of Paul Ryan and his ilk. Blaming the poor for being poor and telling them they're just not working hard enough.

First, you say that hard work has to be spent on the proper avenues and not just in dead ends. Do you think the people who work at McDonald's or Walmart and similar dead-end jobs aren't looking for other avenues? Of course they are. The problem is they lack in-demand skills and don't have the funds to acquire them.

Second, you talk of time to devote to learning. A lot people work more than one minimum wage job just to break even. Do you think they have time to go to school or enroll in training programs? As for having a large social circle, it's meaningless if those connections can't improve your skill set.

Third, if money is so easy to come by, then why are there so many poor people in this country?

Fourth, debt by itself isn't a bad thing. Businesses borrow money all the time even though they already have debt to pay off. What matters is whether the potential reward outweighs the risk. The guy who goes off to med school starts out with no money and then puts himself into debt. Is that a mistake? Obviously not since he eventually lands a job that pays more than enough to cover the debt he incurred. And by the way, people often go further into debt because they have no choice, not because they want to. If I'm broke and can't lower my expenses any further and my friends and family can't help me, then of course I'm going to borrow.

Fifth, it's easier than ever to get an education? What world do you live in? What kind of education are you referring to? Last time I checked, even local colleges cost money. And they aren't cheap. That brings me back to the issue of savings. If you make just enough to pay your bills with no money leftover, then how are you supposed to save? And if you can't save, how are you supposed to pay for this education that you claim is easy to get?

Lastly, people don't CREATE opportunities. They FIND them. But finding them isn't enough. I might see an opportunity to create a new app for Facebook. But what if I don't have the skills to create the app? What if I don't have the funds? Again, we're back to the same problem. How do you acquire skills if you have no money and no time to learn them?
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Old 05-24-2014, 09:33 AM
 
Location: North Idaho
32,632 posts, read 47,964,911 times
Reputation: 78367
Quote:
Originally Posted by k374 View Post
Yes, but say you break your leg and now can't walk... you may go to a hospital and they take care of you but what happens when you get discharged? How will you manage? I know that sometimes hospitals don't even take you in for a procedure unless you have someone else with you who can take you back home!
Your options appear to be lying down in the gutter just outside the hospital doors and crying until you starve to death.

Or, you could do what other people do and call a cab and have it take you home. Then you learn to walk on crutches and get on with your life. Hundreds of thousands of people have been able to manage it. You probably could, too.

If you are really worried about breaking your leg, you could give up skiing for awhile and be extra careful when you are driving (and keep that insurance paid up)
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