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He's been texting me all day and I was trying to politely reiterate that I was no longer interested in seeing him. Then it stopped. Then he showed up at my apartment building very drunk. I spoke to him for a few minutes, told him to leave and to stop contacting me. Defriended him on facebook. Immediately started getting huge paragraph texts from him that no matter what I say he knows "I'm his" because he "looked into my eyes and saw it." Then he said "and i feel like this situation, however bad, is not as bad as it could get.".. I took that to be a threat. I sent him one more text to stop contacting me and his reply was "sue me." At what point do I take this to the police? This is the first I've had to deal with this sort of crazy.
Sorry OP I feel for you I really do. This guy has scott peterson written all over him .
He's been texting me all day and I was trying to politely reiterate that I was no longer interested in seeing him. Then it stopped. Then he showed up at my apartment building very drunk. I spoke to him for a few minutes, told him to leave and to stop contacting me. Defriended him on facebook. Immediately started getting huge paragraph texts from him that no matter what I say he knows "I'm his" because he "looked into my eyes and saw it." Then he said "and i feel like this situation, however bad, is not as bad as it could get.".. I took that to be a threat. I sent him one more text to stop contacting me and his reply was "sue me." At what point do I take this to the police? This is the first I've had to deal with this sort of crazy.
I do believe there is an anti stalking law on the books in NYC. File a report with the police, keep and document all contact made by him. Getting a restraining order may not be the best option at this time, it could escalate the situation. Contact the police department and ask for advice.
Do some research in your area for local support. Don't go anywhere alone!
Try to find out as much information as you can about him, do a records search, the more info you have the better prepared you may be.
Tell your family, friends, coworkers, landlord, etc about the situation. Stay safe!!!!!
DO NOT RESPOND TO HIM AT ALL!
Keep in touch on CD so we know you're okay.
If you care to remember what I said in my post, I said that guys who mention love after a week or two are indeed insecure and mentally unstable! I even said that those two guys I dated turned out to be abusive in one way or another ... Well, I was right. Your guy is no better than those two dumb-dumbs I dated. These men are toxic.
I TOLD you that those words came from a place of insecurity not genuine love. Those two guys I dated became verbally abusive after they confessed their so-called "love" "crush" within a week or two. I got a lucky escape but I learned my lesson. I guess your learned yours too!
A guy who makes you believe in rainbows and butterflies after a week has serious issues and you should see them as RED FLAGS. Those guys are narcissists seeking validation to compensate for their insecurities. They're like Mr Jekyll and Hyde. Sweet one day and harsh the next. The only reason why they say such "lovely" things after a week is because they wanna hook you as quickly as possible so that you don't disappear completely until they get whatever it is they want from you. If they were secure enough in themselves they wouldn't need to throw so-called "love confessions" out there after a week only.
I too was very naive but after I dealt with the second guy I finally gathered those insecure narcissist signs.
If you care to remember what I said in my post, I said that guys who mention love after a week or two are indeed insecure and mentally unstable!
Let's not go overboard. Well... again, anyway. Plenty of people say "I love you" within this time frame and don't turn into stalkers. In fact, now that I think on it, my wife and I may have said it to each other within the second week of dating, can't recall. I'll ask her when she gets up
Let's not go overboard. Well... again, anyway. Plenty of people say "I love you" within this time frame and don't turn into stalkers. In fact, now that I think on it, my wife and I may have said it to each other within the second week of dating, can't recall. I'll ask her when she gets up
Well, you have to pay attention to the dynamic of the relationship though. If you guys knew each other BEFORE dating, that's another story. Now when a total stranger tells you he loves you after a week (assuming you saw each other once or twice during that week), that's a little unsettling!
Most likely, he's believes he's in love (which he isn't) with the fantasy in created in his head. Not the reality.
Well, you have to pay attention to the dynamic of the relationship though. If you guys knew each other BEFORE dating, that's another story. Now when a total stranger tells you he loves you after a week (assuming you saw each other once or twice during that week), that's a little unsettling!
Oh, absolutely. You should consider more factors than just these "red flags", that was my whole point. "Proceed with Caution" signs is all they really are. You walk in on the guy having sex with another woman, or he hits you - that's a red flag. Just my opinion.
He's been texting me all day and I was trying to politely reiterate that I was no longer interested in seeing him. Then it stopped. Then he showed up at my apartment building very drunk. I spoke to him for a few minutes, told him to leave and to stop contacting me. Defriended him on facebook. Immediately started getting huge paragraph texts from him that no matter what I say he knows "I'm his" because he "looked into my eyes and saw it." Then he said "and i feel like this situation, however bad, is not as bad as it could get.".. I took that to be a threat. I sent him one more text to stop contacting me and his reply was "sue me." At what point do I take this to the police? This is the first I've had to deal with this sort of crazy.
Stop responding to him! I know it's instinct to want to make it clear to him that it's over but you've already done that and no amount of you explaining it to him is going to get through to him. He's not mentally stable and you can not rationalize with him. Cut all contact and, as mentioned already, save all his messages, then contact the police. There's probably nothing they can do about it now but it's best if they already have this on file so if it escalates further, they have all the documentation they need. Change your phone numbers if you have to.
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