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I've got myself in a bit of dilemma an I'm not sure how to resolve it or proceed.... I hope on reading this you don't think too badly of me....
In December (having been single for 2 yrs) I met a really nice guy from home (let's call him T) and we hit off and we started seeing each other, it turned out we lived very close to each other (despite never meeting before) so we spent a lot of time together a each others homes, it was intense... However it was always going to come to an end, we both new at the start I'd be leaving an moving with work (over 7 hrs travel away). Although we fell for each other, we didn't want to get into a long distance relationship, so had a very emotional goodbye and vowed to stay friends.... That was in April. Since I've left we've spoken / skyped at least 2 or 3 times a week, I love talking to him and think about him a lot, however I resolved myself to the fact it wasn't going anywhere.... So Ive been slowly reducing contact.
In late May, I went abroad with a group of friends most of which are single, while away I clicked with one of the guys, who I've known for about a year or so, we've worked together on a project before and we've always had good chat 'banter' and laughter, one night in a drunken state, he confessed he really fancied me and I guess I liked the attention, I fancied him and responded to his advances (let's call him S)... We basically ended up having a week long romance, but again he lives far away (8 hrs travel...) so when we parted again left it as friends (or so I thought). In that time I had no contact with T.
When I got back home S contacted me and said he was coming to see me ( I was really flatter and excited), I hadn't spoken to T, but I knew he was also away with family, but I did feel very guilty, even though we were no longer 'together' I still have feelings for him, but also now had feelings for S... S came to visit for a long weekend and we had an amazing time..
After S left, T text me saying we needed to talk, we had a long chat and he said he didn't care about the distance and wanted to make some plans so at some point we could get back together, really this should have been my queue to tell him about S, but I just couldn't ( I know I'm a chicken...). Meanwhile S also emailed me saying the same thing... Now I'm really confused and I don't know what to do, I really like them both a lot, I don't want to hurt either of them, yet I'm leaving both dangling.... Both are keen to make plans for 4th July as it's a bank holiday, but I keep making excuses as I can't decide what to do.... Any advice??? Help!
Ummm...yea. Good as any solution here. I regard less of how this turns out, sooner or later yer gonna get caught if you keep this up. Mmmm Hmm...yeppers...awkward!!! Ohh I feel your anxiety, its not easy for guys to find out they are sharing a girl, unbeknownst to them. Causes.... interesting...reactions too.
I would just honestly explain the sit to both of them. Tell T how you thought you were supposed to be moving on... so you did. Tell S how you thought T was out of the picture and now he is not. And see what they say. Ask them for suggestions.
If nothing else, hearing how they talk and think about the issue will help you get to know each of them better.
If you break out the webcam I'm sure there is a few bucks in it as well.
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