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Don't be his other woman, and stay out of it. Now if you wanna warn his wife bad enough, get a tape recorder and record him saying it, or use sound record on your phone, then let her hear it.
It seems like alot, but no more than sleeping without someone just to get dirt on them.
And don't be his other woman for any reason. You told him correctly. if he wants you so much, leave his relationship like a man first.
If he can't leave her for you, he doesn't care for you. You're just an extra dish on the side he'll enjoy if he and his wife are fighting, or if he just wants something different. But he'll still keep her gladly. I think more often than not, men dump their mistresses before their girlfriends and wives. I think only a few may start something serious with a side dish, and leave their wives for them.
I know a girl in your exact position. I bring her up alot, because she works for many examples of bad, and desperate. lol
The Mistress
Spoiler
She's stuck on herself--least she acts as such. She brags about being in Law School, having a killer body, and hot face, and great hair. She also thinks her personality is fine. She's a mistress to a man who has a girlfriend of 5 years. She's been sleeping with him for 10 months, and hates his girlfriend because she's ugly, and doesn't deserve the guy she has. but he has not left his girlfriend for her, blows her off, spends more time with his girlfriend than her, blocks her on facebook for weeks at a time, and even asked her to come to his place and take her pants off for him and his friends. Clearly he does not love this woman. but she's very hot, does whatever he asks her to do in bed, and lets him lead her around. then she gets mad that he treats her like a prostitute.
She states she's knows she's an idiot to be used like she is, and a jerk for being a mistress, but she's attracted to the guy and can't leave. Well if she allows herself to be used like a *****, no surprise she'll be treated like one. It's been 10 months, and this man has not left his girlfriend for her. He was single for a bit, but only because his girlfriend left him lol, but I think they're back together now. And when his girlfriend was gone, the guy tried to get her back, and still didn't make effort to spend time with his mistress. He's fine seeing her once every few weeks for sex, he wants her for nothing more, though she says they text consistently, when he's not with his girlfriend--in which case, he ignores her texts
This is a sad girl--not even a woman, a little girl in a woman's body. And for someone that acts so stuck on themselves, she doesn't seem to have any self-respect, or willpower.
DO NOT become his mistress, even once. Because if you do it, you're just as bad because you willingly slept with a man who had a wife. Why get yourself dirty just to shame someone else.
But if you absolutely must get involved, do a recorder. because she won't believe you without proof. She'll just think you're trying to split her and her husband up because you want him. So, record a conversation, then take it to her.
Like asking him "Do you remember what you told me about fooling around without your wife knowing?" He;ll probably answer with something like "Yes", and you got him. He admitted it to you, and his wife would hear it.
Or asking him, "You said you wanted to hook up with me, are you still interested?" Again, he'll answer with a yes, and you got him.
Last edited by HappyRain; 06-19-2014 at 04:01 PM..
Yeah that's what I'm leaning towards. But I still need evidence!
No, you don't. But think about this: how does his position at work relate to yours? If you blow the whistle to his wife, could he cause fallout for you at work?
I told him no thanks! He said he thought I was one of the hottest women he ever met and his wife is a frump and he wants to leave her. I've seen pictures and she looks fine to me. He thinks she has let herself go. He has talked so much about her and she is much more intelligent and educated than he is. Plus, she makes more than him in her career. I do not have many friends at work, but this was one guy I got along great with. I liked his personality. He is very good looking, but I never considered this! I told him that he was just looking for excuses to leave his marriage because he's not happy. It has nothing to do with me at all. Then he said I'd be good motivation. I told him if he wanted to get with me he has to leave her first! But even then he sounds like a jerk and not some guy I'd want now. But I am thinking about taking him up on his offer one time and then telling his wife. I'd say she deserves better!
That's very selfless of you, but you don't need to do that. I'm sure he's telling several other women that they're "one of the hottest he's ever met" and trying to cheat with them too, so you aren't his wife's last hope.
Yeah that's what I'm leaning towards. But I still need evidence!
And how would having sex with him, unless you take a video or pictures of it, would you have evidence? I like how you're all "Oh, HELL NO" and "He's a jerk" to then "oh, I might take him up on it but just once"
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,699 posts, read 41,742,544 times
Reputation: 41381
Quote:
Originally Posted by Shay Dee Forester
With me!
I told him no thanks! He said he thought I was one of the hottest women he ever met and his wife is a frump and he wants to leave her. I've seen pictures and she looks fine to me. He thinks she has let herself go. He has talked so much about her and she is much more intelligent and educated than he is. Plus, she makes more than him in her career. I do not have many friends at work, but this was one guy I got along great with. I liked his personality. He is very good looking, but I never considered this! I told him that he was just looking for excuses to leave his marriage because he's not happy. It has nothing to do with me at all. Then he said I'd be good motivation. I told him if he wanted to get with me he has to leave her first! But even then he sounds like a jerk and not some guy I'd want now. But I am thinking about taking him up on his offer one time and then telling his wife. I'd say she deserves better!
So you want to risk losing your job and having a scorned wife on your a$% like the FBI and having a rep as a homewrecker? Only someone with just no class or self-respect would consider this.
If he wanted to leave his wife because of the sole reason he is unhappy he would have. People don't seek to stay in situations that make them uncomfortable.
he looking for a side benefit or a jumping off point/excuse to force his situation to what he knows it can't be under the current guise.
Tell him to deal with his self made problems before he attempts to make others and then leave him be. His life and surrounding problems within are not yours to deal with.
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