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Reread the OP - in her scenario the bf/gf do not live together. The gf comes over to do the cleaning and cooking. Other women have warned that gf that doing this is a mistake - the bf might think "why buy the cow when you get the milk for free".
I don't think you and I live in the same century. I've never heard anyone use that quote without irony unless it was in a black and white movie.
It still makes no sense to me, especially since this isn't 1940. Don't people who live together generally share such duties? I don't see what being married or not has to do with it.
No no, I'm asking about a question I saw posted on another site. The girl said she cooks and cleans for her bf, but they do NOT live together.
So the responses to her question were that those are wife privileges. Meaning that's an arrangement that men will only experience once marriage has occurred.
I do find it a bit odd to just pop up at your partners house with a mop in hand, ready to clean his house.
I'd clean if I stayed over a lot though, just like it'd be nice if he were to lend a helping hand if he stayed over at my place a lot.
And hey! I used that quote everyone knows "why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free" I live in the US and i'm 20!
No no, I'm asking about a question I saw posted on another site. The girl said she cooks and cleans for her bf, but they do NOT live together.
So the responses to her question were that those are wife privileges. Meaning that's an arrangement that men will only experience once marriage has occurred.
I do find it a bit odd to just pop up at your partners house with a mop in hand, ready to clean his house.
I'd clean if I stayed over a lot though, just like it'd be nice if he were to lend a helping hand if he stayed over at my place a lot.
And hey! I used that quote everyone knows "why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free" I live in the US and i'm 20!
Showing up to clean someone else's house is indeed bizarre, unless they are physically unable to do so and/or they're paying you.
Chores are shared by people who live together. Sex is shared between people who are attracted to each other. Neither has anything to do with privileges, cows, or milk.
I so agree with you! Cooking and cleaning are important tasks that need to be done and done regularly.
There is nothing "submissive" about either job.
Agreed, feeding and cleaning up after yourself is hardly submissive.
Chores just need to be divided so neither partner is doing all or most of the work, the workload will change from outside forces, but in general it needs to be shared.
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Agreed, feeding and cleaning up after yourself is hardly submissive.
Chores just need to be divided so neither partner is doing all or most of the work, the workload will change from outside forces, but in general it needs to be shared.
But not all relationships are the same. If one partner is a stay at home (mother/father) and the other one is working full time, I'd think there is not a balance going on.
The partner who stays home should, in my opinion, clean. They have the time to do so.
All of the relationships in my family are like this however. Woman cooks and cleans (even if she works) while the man is typically the bread winner. Perhaps, as I suggested, it is a cultural thing.
I feel like the term submissive is only being thrown around by a few feminists in here because this has to do with the woman cooking and cleaning. Not so sure they'd cry about the submissiveness of it if this was about a stay at home husband/father (which they seemed to have excluded)
I was friends with two guys whose father was a stay at home husband. But they told me he was lazy and that they struggled financially and the mother was working 2 jobs to support their family of 5. And they said that he didn't do anything around the house. Now that's unfair imo
But not all relationships are the same. If one partner is a stay at home (mother/father) and the other one is working full time, I'd think there is not a balance going on.
The partner who stays home should, in my opinion, clean. They have the time to do so.
That is the same thing. The balance is the guy is at work for 9-something hours, and the woman is home doing cooking, cleaning, laundry, kids, etc. for probably the same amount of time.
It's a partnership. My husband and I have gone through moments of all them, both working full time, me being home full time while he worked, and now me working part time.
We adjust the chores accordingly. It seems kinda like a no-brainer to me. There is "X" amount of stuff that needs to be done: doing something to bring home money, cleaning and eating, and raising the kids.
Just divvy it up accordingly.
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All this constant arguing about chores. It's easily settled: 1 person cooks, the other does the dishes.
Eh, I used to go by this, but not anymore. If one person cooks relatively neatly, cleans up as they go, and leaves little prep, and the other rips up the kitchen and uses a million dishes, utensils, measuring cups, etc., things can get really unbalanced really quickly. I found that my husband makes a concerted effort to cook more neatly and clean up as he goes if it's not a given that I'll be the one cleaning up after him. Most of the time, kitchen cleanup/dishes are a joint effort, anyway. So's cooking, usually. I'll usually help with prep even if he's doing the actual cooking. Goes faster that way.
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everyone knows "why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free" I live in the US and i'm 20!
