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I've heard this from gf's, and from one of my cousins. Women have told me I've the first dude to ask 'em out in a couple of years. And these are smart women, cool women, but they don't have the flashy kind of looks. They don't stand out in a crowd.
I have never experienced this though I can see it.
Maybe it's just the crowds I run with or the city I am, but women are never flattered to be asked out. They are quick to reject and really without even thinking twice about it.
If you are a black woman, and to a lesser degree Indian or East Asian, then I can see how those women might not get asked out nearly as much. But still, in my experience, it's never "Oh wow, a date, it might turn into something."
You are all crying as if you can't approach anyone. What about the 60% of guys who are not 8, 9, or 10? Is every female in a relationship considered gorgeous? Uh...have you seen Honey Boo Boo? Hardly a model figure.
I'm unsure how the post you quoted is 'all crying as if you can't approach anyone' when it states They may choose whom they approach.
You chose not to read (or retain in your memory) the part of my posts that said women who get turned down when they approach still don't have a choice. I mentioned women approaching in several posts.
You honestly think women get turned down more frequently then men? That's almost laughable. I'm not saying a woman will always be accepted, but I'm willing to bet she has a better shot of getting a date on any random occasion.
You are all crying as if you can't approach anyone. What about the 60% of guys who are not 8, 9, or 10? Is every female in a relationship considered gorgeous? Uh...have you seen Honey Boo Boo? Hardly a model figure.
And what are the women doing to get the 8, 9 or 10 guy? Sitting next to the 10 blonde feeling nothing but resentment. How about you make a guy feel desired, go up to him, and say "hey, you look interesting, let's talk". Then you take his attention away from the "hot blonde" enough to see your hot personality. Or is that a little too nontraditional???
Guys can get rather rude if you interrupt them while they're busy trying to find an opening to talk to the hot '10'.
It's not uncommon for average chicks to pine after a guy... then to hear from someone that he's been turned down by the girl he was more interested in. Then guess who calls? That's not really a flattering situation to be in, to know that you're second choice. That's life, though.
I'm unsure how the post you quoted is 'all crying as if you can't approach anyone' when it states They may choose whom they approach.
I think I meant to quote who that person was quoting. But I still don't see how it's entirely on the guy. It's on both genders equally. Just like one person has to choose to approach the other, that person has to choose to accept the approach. Saying it's all on the guy is just silly.
I didn't say that. I said some get none. Some may get approached once or twice in a blue moon. And if you want to call it at 35% or 40%, fine. That still leaves 60-65% who rarely get a chance to say yay or nay. For some reason, men like to argue that women have so many options, but that's a minority of women. The point was, there are many women in the same boat as the guys complaining about a lack of options, but those women are never cited as examples.
I ask out average and below women all the time.
Like usual, I have no idea what your MO is here. What are you trying to say? Average women don't get asked out and are dying to be asked out?
But then you have to ask yourself, if the girl doesn't particularly stand out in the looks department, why would a guy approach them to begin with? Are they wearing their graduation gown with a chain around their neck displaying their diploma to show off their education? If they want to be noticed for something other than their looks, how do they show that asset?
This is a key question. They can show their personality, and be bubbly and outgoing, fun, or interesting to talk to. This is where it's helpful for men to value personality over star-quality looks. The woman with the star-quality looks and a half-dozen guys trying to get her attention may have a personality that's a turn-off.
But there's been some interesting articles on this topic recently. The way to show their non-physical assets (this is for both men and women) is to put themselves in situations where they can get to know people over time, so others can notice their unique qualities. That means: joining group activities of some sort. Experts are saying for the top 30% or so, looks are enough to attract a mate. For the rest, "uniqueness" is the attractant, but usually that's only noticeable in recurrent interactions over time.
90% of the women interested in me are overweight and I don't mean a little chunky. I don't register in the radar of the majority of girls that are 5 and 6. I'm 31, 5'11" 180 lbs and this is what my face looks like.
I'm hoping you don't take this the wrong way, but you look like a killer. For the love of God SHAVE and stop trying to meet people on the internet.
OP I feel you. At that age there are not a lot of men who will be interested. Unless you look like a porn star. The best you can do is a man older than you. The men your age who are not awful are married and raising their kids now. Sad but true. BTW we are in the same age group, and I'm speaking from experience.
If you look like (um who is supposed to be attractive...) OK Kim Kardashian, Adriana Lima or Mila Kunis (thanks Google) you can get a rich older man. If not, you will get a broke older man. One of my friends just got married. She's older than you. Her husband is a bald, fat, unattractive older man with kids. After spending a lot of her money and her time dating online, driving across the country and up and down the eastern seaboard, that is the best she could do.
She is sweet, fun, well-educated and well off. In my opinion, she deserves better, but men don't really think that way. Don't waste your time. Are you really going to have kids at your age? It is also going to be a PITA to involve another adult into your life. There is a saying in Spanish "Mejor sola que mal acompanada."
My advice would be to plan to adopt kids or get a surrogate or something, and start a business. Money is more important than a husband. And frankly, the time and money you are going to invest in finding a man is statistically not going to pay off. If your main goal is to have a family, you can do that without marrying someone.
If you are lonely, you can also date stress free. If you are good looking, stop meeting people online. I don't care how many people do it, I think it is better to meet face to face. Do some of the activities you like and meet men to date, and don't worry about trying to get one to marry you. As some people have mentioned, many men your age will want a younger woman if they are marriage minded...Sorry 2B harsh.
Guys can get rather rude if you interrupt them while they're busy trying to find an opening to talk to the hot '10'.
It's not uncommon for average chicks to pine after a guy... then to hear from someone that he's been turned down by the girl he was more interested in. Then guess who calls? That's not really a flattering situation to be in, to know that you're second choice. That's life, though.
Hahahaha. Okay let me get this straight. You never go into a bar and have your eye on that one guy who seems to be what you're looking for? Women don't clamor over that "tall, dark, and handsome" guy with the great smile? So much so that they don't even notice the other guy who can't keep his eyes off of you?
Every date you've gone on has been with the guy who you saw and said "that's the guy I want in my life"? It has never been "well, that guy there didn't ask me out, but this other guy who is also attractive did"?
Like usual, I have no idea what your MO is here. What are you trying to say? Average women don't get asked out and are dying to be asked out?
LMAO.
I'm just asking you why you pick examples like this:
Quote:
Originally Posted by JJS99;
I knew a woman who had at least 7 guys interested in her in the year that I knew her, all guys that she knew. So, I'm not even counting the guys who went up to her at bars and crap like that. I would say that's pretty typical for an average white woman in their 20s, because that is what she was, so why would I have a reason to think different.
to moan about, when that represents only about 30% of women? You're presenting this as if it's the norm, which it isn't.
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