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Old 07-02-2014, 10:49 AM
 
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,938 posts, read 36,759,907 times
Reputation: 40634

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Quote:
Originally Posted by MissSunshine2020 View Post
LOL you don't happen to live in Bethesda, NYC or San Francisco?

Boston, but I've lived in SF (and Chicago and others too), but even there, 27-37 single non smoking non drinking guys wanting and instant family and making 75k are going to be uncommon. And not into sports? LOL.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Mikala43 View Post
Honestly, if that was a guys profile I was reading, I wouldn't go out with him as that person doesn't sound like any fun. Too much on healthy eating (and I do eat healthy), no drinking, and other stuff....

This this this. As I eat my steel cut oatmeal breakfasts and spinich salad, the last thing I'm looking for is someone that can't cut loose on occasion, and proclaims they always want to maintain control and think things she isn't interested in is a waste of time. It screams: I am not fun. That is probably the case. Way too serious and can't go with the flow.

 
Old 07-02-2014, 10:51 AM
 
Location: SacTown
1,259 posts, read 1,245,661 times
Reputation: 1965
39 and you look really young? Please post a pic? I want to see a near 40 year old that looks 25- I've never seen one before.

A quick selfie no make up would be suffice.
 
Old 07-02-2014, 10:51 AM
 
85 posts, read 59,356 times
Reputation: 26
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dewdrop93 View Post
A couple of things stand out to me - but I've never done OLD so take it with a grain of salt.

You are 39 but are looking for someone younger than you who looks even younger than they actually are… Why not look for people around your own age? It doesn't matter how young you look - you are how old you are. It's great that you think you look younger - but you ARE 39 and would probably have more in common with someone around your own age than someone in their late 20's. Just my two cents.

And the other thing- you make it sound like you think it's great that you don't have children - yet you said in one of your later posts that you want to get married and have a child before you turn 43. I wouldn't emphasize your happiness at not having children if you actually want to have children. I would say that you haven't started a family yet or something - because they way you have it worded - it sounds like you don't want children.
My situation is hard to explain to people, but I'll try. Yes, I'm 39, but I haven't had the issues that many people typically experience by the time they reach my age. For starters, I'm an introvert. I don't believe in pre-marital sex and lastly, I don't drink, smoke or socialize in bars, clubs, lounges etc, because I lead a very clean lifestyle. I've always been this way. In college I attended maybe 2 parties at most, and stayed for only 10 minutes. I have never been in a long term relationship, but I have been on many dates. Typically, it's usually the guy who will tell me that he has decided to move on, even when I am trying to be extra nice and attempting to make our relationship work long-term.

I look very young and due to how I look, It would be very strange if I was paired with a guy who happened to be my age, but was divorced with a child or two and an ex smoker. Quite frankly I wouldn't feel comfortable dating an old looking guy.
 
Old 07-02-2014, 10:53 AM
 
85 posts, read 59,356 times
Reputation: 26
Quote:
Originally Posted by soy sauce View Post
39 and you look really young? Please post a pic? I want to see a near 40 year old that looks 25- I've never seen one before.
I have disclosed a lot of personal information about myself, so I don't feel comfortable posting a real picture.

Imagine if my coworkers also read city data and happened to come across my pic. That would be very awkward. I'm a private person and do not want all of my business out in the open.
 
Old 07-02-2014, 10:55 AM
 
Location: The point of no return, er, NorCal
7,400 posts, read 6,338,494 times
Reputation: 9636
No to pre-marital sex, and at your age? Good luck with that. Have you tried a religious dating site?
 
Old 07-02-2014, 10:55 AM
 
Location: SacTown
1,259 posts, read 1,245,661 times
Reputation: 1965
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissSunshine2020 View Post
I have disclosed a lot of personal information about myself, so I don't feel comfortable posting a real picture.

Imagine if my coworkers also read city data and happened to come across my pic. That would be very awkward. I'm a private person and do not want all of my business out in the open.
Direct message me with a photo?
 
Old 07-02-2014, 10:55 AM
 
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,938 posts, read 36,759,907 times
Reputation: 40634
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissSunshine2020 View Post
My situation is hard to explain to people, but I'll try. Yes, I'm 39, but I haven't had the issues that many people typically experience by the time they reach my age. For starters, I'm an introvert. I don't believe in pre-marital sex and lastly, I don't drink, smoke or socialize in bars, clubs, lounges etc, because I lead a very clean lifestyle. I've always been this way. In college I attended maybe 2 parties at most, and stayed for only 10 minutes. I have never been in a long term relationship, but I have been on many dates. Typically, it's usually the guy who will tell me that he has decided to move on, even when I am trying to be extra nice and attempting to make our relationship work long-term.

I look very young and due to how I look, It would be very strange if I was paired with a guy who happened to be my age, but was divorced with a child or two and an ex smoker. Quite frankly I wouldn't feel comfortable dating an old looking guy.

What does a young, successful, educated guy in a big city who wants to enjoy life and have fun/relax after working in his upwardly mobile career get from being with you? What do you have to offer a dude?
 
Old 07-02-2014, 10:56 AM
 
12,535 posts, read 15,154,564 times
Reputation: 29087
1. I'm a spiritual person. I try to do good, each and every day. Like what?

2. I love to travel; I've visited countries in West Africa, Northern Europe, the Caribbean, Canada and many states within the U. S. I'm looking forward to venturing to China and South Africa in 2015. Interesting.

3. I enjoy eating healthy and I try to maintain a stress free, active lifestyle. I do not smoke or drink and recently I cut out sugarcane from my diet. It was far easier than I initially thought it would be, probably because I tend to cook a lot of my own meals. If you want a health nut, great, but usually there are boxes to check for smoking and drinking, so there is no need to reiterate here. Also, I wouldn't go into the part about sugar because it will leave a lot of men wondering if you're going to preach to them.

4. Although I like children, I must admit that I enjoy not having any, because I'm able to focus much of my spare time (and resources) towards my own self development.





That right there is going to turn a LOT of people off because it makes you sound incredibly self-absorbed. Heck, I'm a woman, I don't want or particularly like children, and I stopped reading right there because it just sounds so crassly egotistical. Again, there are checkboxes for whether someone wants kids or not. Use them.
 
Old 07-02-2014, 10:58 AM
 
Location: SoCal again
20,687 posts, read 19,824,686 times
Reputation: 42955
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissSunshine2020 View Post
I have disclosed a lot of personal information about myself, so I don't feel comfortable posting a real picture.

Imagine if my coworkers also read city data and happened to come across my pic. That would be very awkward. I'm a private person and do not want all of my business out in the open.
Well, they are more likely to see you on a dating site as here. And there is even more info about you there.

I came across several of my coworkers when I was on OLD. Awkward at first, then we laughed about it and gave each other advice on how to improve our profile.
 
Old 07-02-2014, 10:59 AM
 
8,518 posts, read 15,600,195 times
Reputation: 7711
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissSunshine2020 View Post
I would like feedback on my online dating profile. Do you think it's good or should I be a little less direct?

--------

I'm funny, witty, intelligent, kind heart-ed, caring, ambitious, loving, dependable, sweet, (a little shy) and other nice adjectives.

A little additional Information about me:

1. I'm a spiritual person. I try to do good, each and every day.

2. I love to travel; I've visited countries in West Africa, Northern Europe, the Caribbean, Canada and many states within the U. S. I'm looking forward to venturing to China and South Africa in 2015.

3. I enjoy eating healthy and I try to maintain a stress free, active lifestyle. I do not smoke or drink and recently I cut out sugarcane from my diet. It was far easier than I initially thought it would be, probably because I tend to cook a lot of my own meals.

4. Although I like children, I must admit that I enjoy not having any, because I'm able to focus much of my spare time (and resources) towards my own self development.

5. I really enjoy taking very long walks/hikes, camping, reading, painting still life, photography, blogging, cooking, dining out at healthy establishments, visiting family, and spending time with my pet.

6. At times, I enjoy solitude, but I also like being around thoughtful, intelligent and creative people who lead very healthy lifestyles.

7. I rarely watch TV.

8. I'm rarely bored.

9. I love being around diverse cultures and learning new things.

10. I'm often told that I look much younger than my actual age.

11. I have no political affiliations or leanings towards democrats or republicans...

----
First, I would try to organize this into paragraphs, not a list. One paragraph to give a little background on who you are, where you grew up, what you do for living, etc. Another paragraph to talk about what you like to do, your personality, and so forth.

Next, I would leave out the things that the reader either won't believe, such as #10, or just doesn't care about (item 8)

Quote:
Originally Posted by MissSunshine2020 View Post
I only posted the information in my "about me section." There is another section where I post, what I am looking for.

I've included it below:
-----
I'm looking for a (27 - 37 year old) single, heterosexual, intelligent/professional, physically fit, health conscious, morally grounded man who resides in the same city. I like all colors/ethnic backgrounds.

I do like children, but I prefer a mate who doesn't have any.

Thanks in advance for taking the time to read my profile.
--------
Give the reader terms they won't misapply to themselves. Everyone thinks they're intelligent, even when they're not. A lot of people think they're fit even though they're not. Morally grounded could mean anything. If you're going to spell out who you want, it should be blatantly obvious to the reader whether they meet your requirements. For example, saying you want someone with no kids is clear. Non-smoker is clear.
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