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I really don't get her theory on redirecting my order at restaurants, I mean, if I got fat, that'd be my business. If she got fat, I wouldn't redirect her.
I really don't get her theory on redirecting my order at restaurants, I mean, if I got fat, that'd be my business. If she got fat, I wouldn't redirect her.
She wishes to control and dominate you Grasshopper.
this fall we'll both be seniors in high school ( YES !!!!! FINALLY !!!!!) and we've been dating since fall of our sophomore year. My girlfriend Amber is sweet, funny, and gorgeous. Her flaw is how " motherly" she is. I know everything she says to me, is said with good intentions. She's the oldest of 3 and because her mom is always working, from a young age, she was " mom" to her two brothers( great guys btw). She dished out the chores, cooked dinner most nights, broke up fights between brothers, etc so it's in her fiber to act this way, but it's annoying.
I'm not exaggerating with anything I'm about to tell you. If it's a Saturday and she's over during the day, we can't leave for dinner until I've cleaned my room( I'm a teenage guy, I consider " well I can see the floor at least" as clean.) and they must be cleaned by her standards. If it's a Friday, we can't leave until I've done the " light" homework, you know, worksheets, math problems, vocabulary words, basically anything that's not studying for a test or a paper. Her argument being " now you don't get to procrastinate" If we're at a restaurant, she insists I tell her what I plan on ordering, again, being a teenage guy, being " healthy" is not my plan, if she doesn't approve her response will be " looks unhealthy, I think you should consider the______.". She doesn't do any of these things with dictator like tones by any means. What she's doing to me is what she does to her brothers. They can't go do social things unless their rooms are clean, homework is done, and all of the meals she cooks for the 3 of them are healthy. How do I talk to her? I've tried little talks, but she keeps doing it. Suggestions?
let it go. she grew up doing this, and it is now very hard for her to try and stop doing it. just go with the flow and let her be her, you wont change her and you wont like it if she changes trust me.
look at this as a growing experience for you though, she is pushing you to be better than you are right now, and trust me that is actually good for you. especially if you plan on going into the military. you think she is always pushing you, wait until you get a real boss or a DI.
I really don't get her theory on redirecting my order at restaurants, I mean, if I got fat, that'd be my business. If she got fat, I wouldn't redirect her.
I draw the line on food.....f-that! You don't need this any of this brudda.
If this girl can't figure out the difference between her little brother and her boyfriend, then it tells you she likes to control people. If you want this young lady running your life, telling you what to eat etc for the rest of your life, then keep her. Otherwise, time to say adios.
Get straight to the point. Don't sugarcoat it by telling her how wonderful her intentions are either.
Don't get mad while you tell her either. Just matter of fact tone in your voice.
When she starts in on state of your bedroom, say "well, it's my room" and bring the subject right back around to whatever you two are going to do (out to dinner). Don't talk about your bedroom anymore even if she does. Don't respond.
Tell her you will order whatever it is you are planning to order and just order it. Let her go on about what's healthy or not. Don't respond.
Tell her you will procrastinate if that's what you want to do. It's your homework.
Simply tell her to quit telling you what to do. Tell her you will make your own decisions and to stop doing it. Nobody likes someone telling them what to do. We all have to suffer through that during childhood from our parents and teachers. After that, nobody gets to order us around (unless it's your boss at work of course, but that is it).
Just tell her to stop ordering you around and advising you. That you don't like it, don't need it, and it's a big turnoff too. She prob doesn't realize you hate it. You have to tell her. Otherwise you'll walk around silently resenting her and she'll be confused and it'll all blow up into something passive/aggressive and nasty.
maybe if I spoil her she'll stop or the brothers and I should revolt
Last edited by thatguyfromthatthing; 07-07-2014 at 05:44 PM..
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