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Old 07-06-2014, 12:15 PM
 
9,001 posts, read 10,154,582 times
Reputation: 14526

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Quote:
Originally Posted by back2MD View Post
I was reading online about psychopaths and it was exactly what i was experiencing read the excerpt below.

The Psychopath’s Hook: Love Bombing, Sex and Flattery



"Psychopaths typically engage in whirlwind romances. They can’t get enough of you. They want to see you and make love to you all the time. They flatter you constantly. They tell you that no woman they’ve ever been with is as smart, as beautiful, as classy as you are. You are the one true love of their lives. Their only love. Victims tend to eat the flattery up, since after all, who doesn’t like to be told such positive and beautiful things? They don’t ask themselves a common sense question: Why is this guy flattering me so much?

This is, indeed, the first question you should ask yourself if you’re being “love bombed,” as they say, by anyone. How many healthy individuals do that? "

"And what makes you so special that out of all the people in the world you turn out to be the most beautiful, brilliant and exciting of all? Could it be that this man has an ulterior motive? Could it be that he told each one of his main targets the same lines?"



The Psychopath’s Hook: Love Bombing, Sex and Flattery | Psychopathyawareness's Blog

The guy who I was talking to gave me a lot of compliments, saying i was the prettiest girl he ever saw in his life, (I thought that was suspect, weird actually) Putting it on way too thick. Silly me, i was rather flattered.
He made plans with me, then canceled, and then said he found someone else the very next day. We were only talking for 3 weeks, we had dinner once and that's it.

Have any of you ever experience this. I will admit i was a bit naive.
I've experienced that, too much, too soon.
Idk if I'd label them psychopaths...
But I definitely call them toxic.....
here's some good reading on it....

Strategies Toxic Men Use To Undermine Women | Teagin Maddox~The Start Over Expert | YourTango

Last edited by believe007; 07-06-2014 at 12:36 PM..
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Old 07-06-2014, 12:16 PM
 
Location: So Cal
52,007 posts, read 52,457,444 times
Reputation: 52522
It usually takes a few more other signs to determine an antisocial personality such as psychopaths or sociopaths, I think the AMA is just classifying them as anti-social personality now... at any rate, he might just be a flake...
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Old 07-06-2014, 12:34 PM
 
9,001 posts, read 10,154,582 times
Reputation: 14526
^^^^ Yes but the root of the problem for many women is:
Why do we attract flakes?

So as I was playing around on the net I came across this...
I think I have been attracting too many flakes in the past few years...
I'm wondering if there's any truth to this....


Are You A Toxic Man Magnet?

And this book-
Toxic Men: 10 Ways to Identify, Deal with, and Heal from the Men Who Make Your Life Miserable
is empowering....helped me get through the most recent mind fu*k or "relationship"

Do you know how to identify a toxic man? - The Globe and Mail
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Old 07-06-2014, 12:38 PM
 
Location: So Cal
52,007 posts, read 52,457,444 times
Reputation: 52522
Quote:
Originally Posted by believe007 View Post
^^^^ Yes but the root of the problem for many women is:
Why do we attract flakes?

So as I was playing around on the net I came across this...
I think I have been attracting too many flakes in the past few years...
I'm wondering if there's any truth to this....


Are You A Toxic Man Magnet?

And this book-
Toxic Men: 10 Ways to Identify, Deal with, and Heal from the Men Who Make Your Life Miserable
is empowering....helped me get through the most recent mind fu*k or "relationship"

Do you know how to identify a toxic man? - The Globe and Mail
God...I'm so glad I'm not out in the dating world.
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Old 07-06-2014, 12:42 PM
 
7,492 posts, read 11,802,433 times
Reputation: 7394
Quote:
Originally Posted by ByeByeLW View Post
Yep, they don't just want quick flings. They want to eat your life.
They have many different purposes for many different people.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Auraliea View Post
If these traits are what lables a psycopath/sociopath then nearly every person I know has socipathic tendencies.

I believe you are looking way too far into it. That guy was pretty much doing what a lot of guys do when they want to hook a girl. They tell you what they think you want to hear, try to make you feel special. It happens all the time.

I don't hardly pay it any attention anymore. This guy doesn't sound like a sociopath at all.
It's not normal to tell someone "you're the most beautiful person I've ever seen!"

Quote:
Originally Posted by rbohm View Post
psychopath is quite the strong word. i think you are over thinking this, and have just dealt with someone who is rather scatterbrained, or more likely he had several irons in the fire, and you were one of those irons. he was able to pick up the iron he wanted first.
That's exactly what psychopaths do; treat people like objects.

Quote:
Originally Posted by back2MD View Post
I was reading online about psychopaths and it was exactly what i was experiencing read the excerpt below.

The Psychopath’s Hook: Love Bombing, Sex and Flattery



"Psychopaths typically engage in whirlwind romances. They can’t get enough of you. They want to see you and make love to you all the time. They flatter you constantly. They tell you that no woman they’ve ever been with is as smart, as beautiful, as classy as you are. You are the one true love of their lives. Their only love. Victims tend to eat the flattery up, since after all, who doesn’t like to be told such positive and beautiful things? They don’t ask themselves a common sense question: Why is this guy flattering me so much?

This is, indeed, the first question you should ask yourself if you’re being “love bombed,” as they say, by anyone. How many healthy individuals do that? "

"And what makes you so special that out of all the people in the world you turn out to be the most beautiful, brilliant and exciting of all? Could it be that this man has an ulterior motive? Could it be that he told each one of his main targets the same lines?"



The Psychopath’s Hook: Love Bombing, Sex and Flattery | Psychopathyawareness's Blog

The guy who I was talking to gave me a lot of compliments, saying i was the prettiest girl he ever saw in his life, (I thought that was suspect, weird actually) Putting it on way too thick. Silly me, i was rather flattered.
He made plans with me, then canceled, and then said he found someone else the very next day. We were only talking for 3 weeks, we had dinner once and that's it.

Have any of you ever experience this. I will admit i was a bit naive.
Be glad it ended there. My mom was with a psychopath and the only way she finally got away from him was when she moved across the country and lied to him about where she was moving.
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Old 07-06-2014, 12:44 PM
 
9,001 posts, read 10,154,582 times
Reputation: 14526
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chowhound View Post
God...I'm so glad I'm not out in the dating world.
Lol you should be
That's why I'm not even looking anymore
Can't be letdown or disappointed
if you're not in the game.
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Old 07-06-2014, 12:50 PM
 
Location: So Cal
52,007 posts, read 52,457,444 times
Reputation: 52522
Quote:
Originally Posted by believe007 View Post
Lol you should be
That's why I'm not even looking anymore
Can't be letdown or disappointed
if you're not in the game.
Tough call.....

Part of me thinks if Mrs. Chow decides to upgrade that I'd just say screw it and be single, but then the other part of me likes having a SO/GF so I don't know...

My dad's wife just died a couple of months ago and he said he's gonna stay single, but I hope he gets himself a GF in a few months. He's not the type to be alone so we'll see what happens with him.
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Old 07-06-2014, 12:59 PM
 
9,001 posts, read 10,154,582 times
Reputation: 14526
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chowhound View Post
Tough call.....

Part of me thinks if Mrs. Chow decides to upgrade that I'd just say screw it and be single, but then the other part of me likes having a SO/GF so I don't know...

My dad's wife just died a couple of months ago and he said he's gonna stay single, but I hope he gets himself a GF in a few months. He's not the type to be alone so we'll see what happens with him.
I love being in a LTR, it's just that I only attract much
younger men for some God forsaken reason


But it would be nice, if serendipity stepped in & brought me a dude
who's got it together & is closer in age to me, lol


As for your father, he needs time; he may never be in a LTR again.
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Old 07-06-2014, 01:34 PM
 
Location: FAIRFAX, VA
599 posts, read 691,754 times
Reputation: 475
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mikala43 View Post
Probably not. Just a guy who found a woman he wanted to be with while he happened to be dating you.

Would it make you feel better to call him a psychopath?
Actually no, it would not make me feel better
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Old 07-06-2014, 01:44 PM
 
153 posts, read 149,852 times
Reputation: 61
Quote:
Originally Posted by back2MD View Post
I was reading online about psychopaths and it was exactly what i was experiencing read the excerpt below.

The Psychopath’s Hook: Love Bombing, Sex and Flattery



"Psychopaths typically engage in whirlwind romances. They can’t get enough of you. They want to see you and make love to you all the time. They flatter you constantly. They tell you that no woman they’ve ever been with is as smart, as beautiful, as classy as you are. You are the one true love of their lives. Their only love. Victims tend to eat the flattery up, since after all, who doesn’t like to be told such positive and beautiful things? They don’t ask themselves a common sense question: Why is this guy flattering me so much?

This is, indeed, the first question you should ask yourself if you’re being “love bombed,” as they say, by anyone. How many healthy individuals do that? "

"And what makes you so special that out of all the people in the world you turn out to be the most beautiful, brilliant and exciting of all? Could it be that this man has an ulterior motive? Could it be that he told each one of his main targets the same lines?"



The Psychopath’s Hook: Love Bombing, Sex and Flattery | Psychopathyawareness's Blog

The guy who I was talking to gave me a lot of compliments, saying i was the prettiest girl he ever saw in his life, (I thought that was suspect, weird actually) Putting it on way too thick. Silly me, i was rather flattered.
He made plans with me, then canceled, and then said he found someone else the very next day. We were only talking for 3 weeks, we had dinner once and that's it.

Have any of you ever experience this. I will admit i was a bit naive.
t
Did he try to murder you ,since a psycopath is truly violent and cold, if hidden beneath flattery etc ?
Maybe he was just a narcissist,plenty of those about ,or a sociopath , plenty of those too.

The latter two will mess you about ,and it is most unpleasant ,but the psycopath would have stayed round, until he had at least made you frightened ,maybe worse .
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