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Cripes, they already go bat poo psycho when I talk about Mr. CSD staying with his 20+ year long female friends, out of state, all by himself, in their home, without me being present.
You would think the entire world had just stopped rotating and that I am the most naive woman on the planet.
Trust me I'm not naive on many levels but the bottom line is we know we are married to each other, I am not jealous of another woman, I am not possessive of my Husband, he is a grown man who can make his own decisions and I would not dream of "telling" him that he cannot keep a 20+ year friendship active just because that friend happens to be female. What a pot of poo-ola.
I'm telling you, I used to be sooo bad with jealousy. It was ridiculous. And when I met Chow, I was compleeetley averse to any relationship. But, once I decided to go ahead and give it a try, I wanted to give it my all and do everything I could to make the right choices and make it work. Not make the same mistakes I did in the past. I wanted to make it like how I imagined a good relationship to be. For a change. Lol.
I can honestly say I have never been jealous however, the background/childhood I pack in my baggage is partially the reason for that. If you only knew a 100th of those details it might actually shock you but you would have a better understanding of the reason Mr. CSD says my brain is like a Pachinko Machine that never shuts off.
You know what's the worst about this stupid schedule I'm on? I'm not even getting any overtime for it. Carefully engineered to beat my mind and body into submission, with absolutely zero benefit to me. I actually LOSE two hours. I hope my boss is having a good time in Florida though.
I work 11pm today to 11am tomorrow, then I have to figure out how I'm going to come back to this God awful place for Monday morning at 7am. I guess I can just not go to sleep when I get home in the morning and stay awake as long as possible.
Of course, after that dayshift, I have to double back and come back in for 11pm that night.
Ugh......where's a rope and a sturdy rafter when you need one?
Sea, Chow, and CSD, do you have any hints for me before I start committing to a long term relationship (stuff to lookout for). As it is, I'm quite tender, and being cheated on would be absolutely heartbreaking. I would never do it to someone else.
Sea, Chow, and CSD, do you have any hints for me before I start committing to a long term relationship (stuff to lookout for). As it is, I'm quite tender, and being cheated on would be absolutely heartbreaking. I would never do it to someone else.
Adi,
Really all I can tell you is what I told Mr. CSD before we ever because "us":
Do not for any reason lie to me
Do not for any reason cheat on me
Do not for any reason steal from me
Do not for any reason think it is okay to become physically aggressive with me
Do not think that I will not walk out without hesitation if any of the above has happened because I will.
I may not like the fact that I am leaving, I may not agree with the fact that I am leaving but I will not turn around and open that door again.
Don't get me wrong I love Mr. CSD to the core of my being, he is a good man, he is an honest man and he has a beautiful heart and soul and I absolutely trust him without hesitation which is not easy for me to do.
I also realize he is a human and humans can and do lose their minds and their morals at times but the reality of my world is that it is all black and white, no gray and once trust is broken it cannot be repaired adequately.
This only pertains to us though and will be very different for you.
Just trust your "Gut" as Gibbs would say, your gut is rarely wrong.
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j/k...
. I'm back in my tank and sweats and going to bed. Today was a productive day. Good night 
.